


Posh Boys and Fucking Foxes

by Callymoon



Category: Harry Styles - Fandom, Louis Tomlinson - Fandom, One Direction (Band), Zayn Malik (Musician), liam payne - Fandom, niall horan - Fandom
Genre: A LOT OF DIALOGUE, Again a lot of dialogue, Alternate Universe - College/University, Anal Sex, Anxiety, Classism, Dirty Talk, F/M, Fingering, Fluff and Angst, Gemma is kind of annoying for some of it, I'm terrible at editing, Liam isn't in it that much, M/M, Money, Oral Sex, Posh Boys, Privilege, Seriously a lot of dialogue, Some angst, Some humour I hope, long fic, scholarship, snobbery, some smut, sorry Gemma, sorry liam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-22
Updated: 2016-10-22
Packaged: 2018-08-16 02:39:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 32
Words: 80,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8083408
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Callymoon/pseuds/Callymoon
Summary: Harry wins a scholarship to the esteemed Oxford University where he meets Zayn, Louis, Niall and Liam. Harry and Zayn quickly fall for each other but family expectations intrude.
Snobbery and misunderstandings.
Narry roommates, Zouis friendship.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TrashTalkingTozier](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TrashTalkingTozier/gifts).



> For Americanhorranstory (Urbanizayntion)
> 
> Thank you so much for your prompts. I loved the Buffy one and if I'd been braver I would have given it a go, but I went for the one University because I felt more comfortable writing that!!
> 
> This is my first time writing a complete fic. I would like to thank the organisers of the Exchange, this is my first time doing anything like this and you were supportive and helpful even when I was extending the deadline and being a pain in the arse!
> 
> I didn't have a beta so all the mistakes are my own. If there are warnings that you think need to be added please let me know, or huge mistakes then I will rectify them!
> 
> I apologise for the length, I am the worst editor ever, and I ramble a lot so again a lot of dialogue!
> 
> One final thanks to my lovely friend M who helped read some of the chapters and was very supportive of this. She is the Zayn to my Harry.
> 
> Thanks to all who read.

Harry wasn't frightened of many things, but the thought of moving to Oxford was scaring the shit out of him. Obviously he would miss his family and friends that was a given, but that wasn't the real issue. It was Oxford itself, not the place but the university.

Harry had worked so hard throughout his A Levels and it had paid off in the form of a scholarship to Oxford. The day he got the letter was both the best day and most nerve wracking day of his life so far. His whole family was so proud of him, he'd been accepted into one of the most prestigious institutions in the world. Harry was also aware that with the place at Oxford and the scholarship came pressure and the expectation that he was going to do well.

Academically Harry thought he would be alright, but there was always a lingering doubt at the back of his mind that he wasn't good enough, that he'd somehow fluked his way into landing the scholarship.

The real issue, the one that had been causing Harry endless sleepless nights was how he was going to fit in at Oxford. Harry was a naturally charming person, when he was talking to someone he gave them all his time so it felt like you were the only person in the room. Being at Oxford was going to be different, it was traditional, it was upper class, it was everything Harry wasn't and he was terrified.

****************

Zayn hated unpacking, it was dull. He'd been back in Oxford for a week and had only just finished unpacking his last box. He was looking forward to this year, he'd partied a lot in his first year safe in the knowledge that your first year doesn't count and doing just enough to pass the course. Zayn knew the second year was when the real work started. 

It was a shame that Niall was resitting the first year, but he'd partied harder than anyone and in all honesty didn't seem that bothered. In fact it gave him the impetus to change his degree course completely. The delight on Niall's face when he discovered he could stay in halls for another year was a picture. 

Niall and Zayn met in secondary school, when Niall's family moved over from Ireland and they'd been friends ever since. Zayn was going to miss living with Niall, he was the most cheerful person he'd ever met. Zayn was sharing with Liam who he'd met last year at a party and Louis.

Zayn and Louis had been best friends since they were five years old. They had attended the same private school and were two of the very few non-boarders. Both Zayn and Louis' families had been of the strong belief that children of that age were far too young to be boarders, so apart from school trips both boys went home after school and weekends. 

Some would say they brought our the worst in each other, Zayn and Louis would disagree. Louis helped Zayn come to terms with his bisexuality and Zayn helped Louis come to terms with the fact he was a sarcastic cocky fucker who never learnt to keep his mouth shut. They were each others first best friends and first kiss, a kiss that was never going to happen again when they realised it felt more like kissing your brother. 

When they were fifteen Louis had nearly been expelled from their elite private school, but thanks to Zayn's plea to his Dad who was on the board of governors Louis was only suspended. The suspension galvanised Louis to such an extent that he finished first in his class ultimately leading him to get a place at Oxford alongside his best mate Zayn. Louis had also scraped a pass in his first year and like Zayn was now ready to crack on with his studies. The partying and going out wouldn't stop, but it would calm down.

After Zayn had finished his unpacking he thought the least he deserved was an afternoon nap, so he picked up Misty the stray cat they had somehow managed to adopt and laid down on his bed for a relaxing afternoon of doing nothing.

 

****************

Harry had slept for maybe two hours on and off last night. He hadn't been able to stomach anything for breakfast and now he was standing in the hall with his Mum while Gemma and Robin loaded his things into the car. He felt sick, and he wasn't sure a car ride with Gemma at the wheel was going to help any.

"Ready love?” Harry’’s mum Anne asked.

"As I'll ever be I guess." Harry couldn't hide the slight frown that appeared on his face.

"Harry are you worried."

"A little bit." Anne took Harry into her arms and hugged him till it felt like he had no breath left. 

"Mum, Mum, I can't breathe." Harry said struggling.

"I'm sorry darling." Anne said reluctantly letting Harry out of her arms.

"No, it's alright, you know how much I love a cuddle."

"What has got that frown on your beautiful face? You know you can come home and visit anytime  
you feel home sick." Anne said, her eyes full of concern.

"It's not that Mum."

"Then what?"

Harry thought how he could explain adequately. ”It's Oxford ,with all the tradition and poshness and I'm just this scholarship kid, and what if no one likes me, or the work is too hard, oh my god what if I fail, what if they take my scholarship away, I don't want to be a disappointment." Harry could feel his throat beginning to close and his skin felt clammy.

"Right Harry, listen to me. One you've never been 'just' anything, two you are the cleverest person I know, although if you tell Gemma that I will deny I ever said it, and three you could never be a disappointment to me. Whatever happens at Oxford, good or bad, we will support you. If you graduate with a First we'll be there shouting and screaming and embarrassing you, if you come home after the first term because you hate it then I'll make you cookies and Gemma will braid your hair. We love you Harry and that isn't dependent on how well you do at Oxford. Please believe me when I say that." Anne said, with sincerity in her voice.

"I know you'll all still love me, and it's not really that I'm worried about. It's like, I'm going to be different to people there you know. I don't know, maybe I'm worrying over nothing." Harry said as he rubbed his hands over his face.

"It's natural to be worried love, you're going off to a strange environment where you don't know anyone."

"Yeah that's not really helping Mum."

"Sorry, you know what I mean though. Harry you have this amazing ability that makes people warm to you instantly. So yes it might be scary at first, but you are so brave when it comes to achieving what you want. You have no fear, so use that."

Harry wished he was fearless, but his Mum and Robin and Gemma had always believed he was braver than he really was.

"I'll try Mum."

"That's all we can ever ask of anyone love." Anne was so full of pride and love for her son.  
"Come on then, otherwise your sister will be barging through the doors in a minute to get you into the car."

"That's because most people don't want to go anywhere willingly in a car with her."

"There he is, that's my Harry.” Anne said 

Both of them turned towards the door as an angry beeping could be heard. "We've got about 20 seconds before she comes in so let's go." Harry said.

Anne put her arm around Harry and they walked out the house, Harry locking the door behind them. They walked to the car and Harry loaded his final bag into the boot, before sliding into the passenger seat. He put his seat belt on and glanced across at his sister.

"Ready H?" Gemma said.

"As I'll ever be." Harry said trying to hide the tremor in his voice.

"You'll be fine Harry, just don't fall in love with a posh boy and forget about us." Gemma joked.

"As if I could ever forget you." Harry said before sticking his tongue out at Gemma. "Come on then, let's get moving."

Gemma started the car and pulled away. Harry watched the scenery pass by as he said goodbye for a while to Holmes Chapel.


	2. Chapter 2

Harry had thrown up four times on the drive down, a combination of nerves, travel sickness, and Gemma’s driving. “For fucks sake Gem you just missed that other car.”

“Language Harry!” Anne shouted.

“Yeah language Harry.” Gemma said, sticking her tongue out at Harry.

“Oh fuck off Gem." Harry said before Anne tutted from the back seat. "Sorry Mum.”

“It’s alright love, we’ll blame it on your nerves.”

"Nerves yeah right, it’s not like Harry usually swears" Gemma said sarcastically.

“I hardly hear any bad words coming out of Harry’s mouth, you on the other hand Gemma.”

“Yeah Gemma." Harry said smugly.

“Oh fuck off Harry”. Gemma just about managed to get out. The four occupants in the car burst out laughing almost resulting in Gemma missing the turnoff for Oxford. “I am going to miss you baby Styles.” Gemma said with fondness in her voice.

"l'll miss you too old lady.” Harry was going to miss his family dearly, especially his sister. There is something special about the dynamic between an older sister and younger brother. Gemma would do anything for Harry, kick his arse when he needed it, listen to him when he was sad and generally just be there for him. 

It worked the other way round too. When Gemma’s boyfriend broke up with her a year after she moved away to University, Harry was on the first train there and the two of them proceeded to spend the next week getting shitfaced and moaning about all men being bastards. 

When he was fourteen Gemma was the first person he came out to. When Harry was sixteen and he had his heart broken, for the first time, Gemma bought ice cream and vodka and they sang karaoke all night. When he found out he got the scholarship to Oxford she was the first person Harry told, and the first person he expressed doubts to about not being up to it.

After what felt like a never-ending journey, mainly due to Gemma's ability to get lost, they finally pulled up outside of the building. Harry's jaw dropped. He'd seen Oxford on the TV, one of his guilty pleasures was watching Lewis, but nothing could have prepared him for seeing it in all it's glory. "Oh my God." Harry exclaimed. It was like nothing he'd ever seen before. Harry had been offered a scholarship on the basis of his application and academic ability, he'd never seen the campus before. There had been admission days during the summer, but Harry had been too busy working to visit. "It's huge, it looks like a castle." Harry said with awe and a little bit of fear in his voice at the thought of being a student here.

“Do you know which building it is love, they kind of look very similar.” Anne said.

“I think it’s that one Mum, it's Balliol College.” Harry said pointing out just one of many of Oxford’s intimidating buildings.

Gemma parked up and they began to unload Harry’s suitcase and boxes and prepared to take them up to what would be his home for the next year.

“I really hope it’s not the top floor H.”

“Build those muscles up in your arms Robin.” Harry said before ducking out of Robin’s reach.

"Cheeky little shit.”

In unison he was greeted with "Language Robin" from Anne, Gemma, and Harry. Goodness Harry was going to miss the fuck out of his family.

Much to Robin's dismay Harry's room was indeed near the top. When they finally finished trudging up the stairs they found the room empty, although it was clear someone had been there as there were boxes on one of the beds. Anne, Robin and Harry placed their boxes on the floor whilst Gemma placed her final box on the bed that was unmade.

"Cheers Gem."

"No worries, I think that's the last one."

"I guess this is it then. I'm finally at Oxford." All four of them including Harry himself heard the tremor in his voice.

"Oh love you'll be alright, and if for some bizarre reason there is anything wrong, you know me, Robin or your sister are only a phone call away." Anne said reaching out for Harry.

"I know I know. It's just.....what if they don't like me? What if my roommate is awful and I have to spend the next year living with them?" Harry said quietly.

"If anyone is mean to you or treats you like shit because of what you might not have then I will be on the train to kick their arse so fast they won't know what hit them. Literally Harry. You're my baby brother and I won't let anyone mess with you, especially some uppity posh boys or girls. You're the best of us and the fact you don't know that makes you more special. So fuck them if they can't see it too, and yes mother I'm well aware I just said fuck.” Gemma said.

"I think on this occasion I can let it slide love." Anne said smiling at Gemma. “Right Harry we're going now, because if I stay much longer I'm going to be a weeping mess and nobody wants that, least of all me. Now listen to your mum for a moment." Anne said, squeezing Harry tight for a minute before letting go. "You are going to have the best time here, you'll make friends and you'll be a great student. But, if you ever change your mind be it in two months or two years then there will always be a place at home for you. All I've ever wanted for both my children is for them to be happy, and if that means you need to stop doing this then you do it love, no judgement from any of us.”

"You're the best mum, you know that right."

"Obviously."

Harry threw his arms around Anne squeezing tightly before being joined by Robin and Gemma. "I just want to say that I love you all so much."

"You too baby brother."

"Yeah H me too.” Robin said.

There was hardly any room to move in the small space with the four of them in a group hug surrounded by boxes, but they managed to hold onto each other for a fair while before Gemma started fretting and pulled out of the hug. "I think we need to go Harry, otherwise your roommate is going to find out we come as a package deal.”

Robin stood back leaving just Anne and Harry in the centre of the room still hugging. "You'll be alright love."

"Promise?"

"Promise Harry." 

Anne reluctantly let Harry go. "Right. Enjoy your first term and we'll see you for Christmas yes??"

"Of course."

"Unless Harry gets invited to some fancy country house by one of his new posh friends." Gemma  
joked. 

"As if Gem. A Styles family Christmas can't be beaten."

"Never forget that baby Styles." Gemma hugged Harry one last time before making her way down  
to the car. 

"Think that one is going to miss you more than you know H." Robin said. 

"She'll be fine, she's got her own studies to concentrate on." Harry said.  
"Well maybe I was talking a bit about myself then." Robin said before pulling Harry into a final hug. 

"Look after Mum for me."

"Always H." Then Robin walked down to the car to comfort Gemma.

"I'll make this quick love. I've never been prouder of you, whatever happens. Love you."

"Love you too Mum." Harry hugged his mum for one last time before she made her way down the stairs holding back the tears.

Harry took a deep breath determined not to cry. He could do this. Harry leant out of the window waving goodbye as Gemma drove off. He waited until the car had long gone before shutting the window and flaking out on the tiny space on his bed not covered by boxes. After the drive down and the realisation that he was finally at Oxford, Harry felt both physically and mentally drained so he let his eyes shut before drifting off to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

"Motherfucker. Jesus what the fuck? Oi mate, any chance you can move some of the boxes lying about?" Niall shouted before peered down at the sleeping boy. "Fuck, not even a peep out of him." Niall was impressed with the boys ability to sleep through his fall and subsequent swearing. "Seriously mate come on, I do not want to shove you off the bed." Niall began shaking Harry's shoulder trying to wake him up but nothing, so he began to poke him with his finger, getting progressively harder as there was no response. "Wake up, wake up, wake up."

"Ow, fuck. What are you doing? Get off me." Harry mumbled. 

"He's alive!!"

"Yes I'm fucking alive, albeit with a bad shoulder now." Harry said as he rubbed the spot on his shoulder where Niall had been poking him.

"Sorry mate, did you not hear me tripping over your boxes when I came in? You know, the ones that are currently taking up most of our room."

Harry looked mortified, this was not how he wanted to start things off with his new roommate. "Oh my God I'm so so sorry, I just laid down for a minute, I was so tired from the journey, and then my family saying goodbye, and I was up really early, and then we like got lost because Gemma, that's my older sister, took a wrong turn despite all of us, me, my Mum and Robin who is my stepdad, telling her it was the wrong way, but seriously you can't tell Gem anything she always knows best, so anyway we ended up down this country lane, the sort you see in horror films where everyone dies, so our journey ended up taking two hours longer than it was supposed to, and then we had to unload all the boxes and then we all had to say goodbye, and I only laid down for a couple of minutes but I think I was more knackered than I thought so I must have fallen asleep, so I think that's probably why I didn't hear you. Once again I'm so sorry." Harry took a breath. 

Niall just stood there mouth hanging open.

"Sorry I ramble when I'm nervous, you know go off on a bit of a tangent and I felt bad because you must have hurt yourself and did I mention I'm really sorry."

"Wow. I've just.....fuck me mate that was a lot of words there."

"The most important one being sorry though."

“Fuck. you speak like really slow mate as well. I mean that's not a bad thing, and like don't sweat it I'm fine, just got a bit of a shock that's all. No harm done." Niall said cheerfully.

"Are you sure?"

"Absolutely. Look, how about in the spirit of getting to know each other you buy me a pint sometime to make it up to me."

"Yeah sure anything." Harry said eagerly.

"Anything? Careful what you wish for there mate." Niall said.

Harry couldn't help the laughter that escaped from his lips. "Ok, a pint it is then. Oh and I'm Harry Styles by the way."

"Niall Horan, good to meet you. What are you reading?"

"Law."

"Ooh does that mean I have to be on my best behaviour." Niall said with humour in his voice.

"Nah, do what you like mate. I'm not bothered."

"You might live to regret that, you haven't met my friends yet."

"Sounds like fun." Harry said.

"Tell you what, we're going for beers tonight you can tag along if you want."

"Really? I won't be intruding?"

"We're roomies now which means unfortunately for you, my friends are now your friends. God help you."

"They can't be that bad surely."

"They're alright, and I've known a couple of them a good few years now."

"Oh so you already knew people before you came then?" Harry said.

"I did, but I'm also repeating my first year which is why you get the pleasure of my company. That also means I actually know quite a few people already."

"Must feel a lot easier when you already know people." Harry said wistfully.

"It is and isn't. Like I was lucky that I already knew Louis and Zayn, they're two of my best mates from home and so that was brilliant, but uni is supposed to be about making new friends and having new experiences which can be tricky when you already have tight bonds with people. Luckily we met Liam so we became a little foursome and he introduced us to some of his mates and they introduced us to some of their mates and so on. Honestly Harry you'll be fine. You'll make friends in your classes and you have an open invitation to join me whenever you like."

"Appreciate that Niall, really." Harry said relieved to find that his roommate was so friendly.

"How about we get these boxes sorted and then you can get yourself ready for beers tonight. You might want to do something with your hair mate it's wild." Niall said gesturing to Harry's mop of brown curls that were currently all over the place.

"I like it like that, gives them something to hold on to." Harry joked.

Niall couldn't help laughing. "You're going to be fun Harry I just know it. Wait till you meet the rest of the boys they'll love you." Zayn especially thought Niall.

"I don't know about that."

"Tell me about yourself whilst we're unpacking your shit. What school did you go to?" Niall said as he crouched down and began opening one of Harry's boxes.

Harry knew what that meant, it was a way of determining what class he was. Private school versus comprehensive. He'd only known Niall fifteen minutes at most, and this was where it could all come crashing down. I mean Niall seemed easy going and friendly enough, but Harry had been fooled before. Oh well, it was fun whilst it lasted Harry thought, might as well get it out of the way now. "I went to my local comp then sixth form." Harry said the defensiveness clear in his voice. 

"Oh."

There it was. Freshers week hadn't even officially started yet. All the misgivings that Harry had before he got out of the car came flooding back. Fuck he wanted to leave. He wanted his friends back home, he wanted Gem, he didn't want to be here. "Actually Niall I think I've got the boxes, I'm probably just going to have a quiet night in after all, bit tired still, maybe another night yeah." Harry was giving Niall an out, making it easy on him. There was always the chance he'd beg Harry to come, but Harry suspected that wasn't going to be the case this time.

"Only if you're sure mate, like you said maybe catch up on your beauty sleep."

Niall took the out. Harry decided to give it one last go. "Exactly, and I've got the open invitation from you right?." Harry didn't have to look very hard to see the doubt appear in Niall's eyes or hear the hesitation in his voice when he spoke.

"Course, anytime like I said. Well I might as well get off now then, get a few extra pints in. Good meeting you Harry, catch you later."

"Good meeting you too Niall, have fun."

"Always do mate."

Niall headed out the door leaving Harry surrounded by his unopened boxes. "Great fucking start." Harry said before slumping back down on to the bed.

****************

Niall knew he'd fucked up the minute Harry hastily backtracked out of going to the pub. Harry had tried to hide the dismayed look on his face after Niall's eloquent 'oh', but Niall was far from stupid despite what some people thought. Sliding his phone out of his pocket he hastily called Zayn's number.

"Yo Niall, what's up mate?” Zayn said sleepily

"Yo Zayn? Really? Who the fuck says that anymore."

"Alright how about, good afternoon young man how are you on this fine and splendid day." Zayn said sarcastically.

"Fuck you."

"Good mood then I see. What's wrong?"

"I fucked up."

"With what?"

"My new roommate."

"Not again, did he catch you fucking some poor fresher like the last time?"

"Rude, and no he didn't."

"What happened then?"

"I think he's a scholarship kid." Niall said.

"So? Since when did any of us give a fuck about that?"

"Exactly."

Zayn sighed. "What did you do Niall"

"I just, I was surprised that's all."

"And......"

"I asked what school he went to and he told me he went to his local comprehensive and then sixth form, and then I might have said 'oh'"

"For fucks sake Niall what did you say that for?" Zayn said with a hint of annoyance in his voice.

"I was surprised that's all, I mean he had some really good clothes on and......"

"You mean as opposed to rags like all the scholarship kids wear nowadays. Maybe he was trying to make a good impression on his posh dick of a roommate. Honestly Niall sometimes I despair."

"I didn't mean it like that Zayn, honest. I was just surprised and fuck I even invited him for beers tonight and he was coming too, well until...."

"Where are you now?" Zayn said, the resignation clear in his voice.

"On my way to yours, just by the pub."

"Stay where you are, I'll come to you and then we'll go sort it out with your new roommate. What's his name?"

"Harry."

"Don't move I'm leaving now."

"Cheers Zayn, love you."

"You too dickface." Zayn said before hanging up on Niall.

Niall breathed a sigh of relief, secure in the knowledge that Zayn would sort everything out like he always did.


	4. Chapter 4

Zayn rolled off the bed dislodging Misty in the process, who then proceed to let out an angry mewl before running under the bed. "Sorry babe, I'm blaming Niall for this." Zayn stuck his arm under the bed and gave the cat a quick stroke. "I'll be back later Mist for cuddles." Misty looked at Zayn and licked his hand. "Niall's fault this, you can scratch the fuck out of him next time he's round." 

Zayn stood up and headed for the bathroom grabbing his skinny jeans on the way, he knew he wouldn't have time for a shower so he had a quick wash, brushed his teeth and spent ten minutes getting his hair to look somewhere he would consider half decent. Zayn grabbed his keys, phone and wallet and headed out to meet Niall at the King's Arms. 

Living only ten minutes away from the pub it didn't take Zayn long to stroll through the streets until he was there. Niall was standing outside talking to some random that Zayn didn't recognise, Niall knew everyone, not literally, but Zayn swore it sometimes felt like it. Niall had this natural ability to charm people, which is what must have happened with Harry before he'd fucked up. "Niall!"

Niall looked around and spotted Zayn, he hastily said goodbye to his classmate before running over to Zayn. "Alright mate."

"Yeah good man. So, let's go and clear this shit up with your new roommate."

"Honestly Zayn I just couldn't stop myself, it was like some kind of deep rooted reflex, and you know I'm not like that. Harry seemed really nice as well, although he rambles like fuck when he's speaking which come to think of it is kind of endearing. Fuck.” I’ve messed up thought Niall.

Zayn draped his arm around Niall's shoulder to comfort him. "Don't stress Niall, I'm on the case now, let Uncle Zayn sort it out for you."

"Seriously I've told you about that uncle stuff before, it creeps me out."

"Why do you think I keep on doing it." Zayn said winking at Niall.

"Such a dick."

"Yet you love me anyway." Zayn joked.

"Always." Niall shouted before smacking a big sloppy kiss on Zayn's cheek.

"Ugh Niall I don't want your spit all over my face." Zayn said wiping the remnants of Niall's saliva off his face.

"I bet you've had worse all over your face. I remember that Oliver bloke, holed up in your room for days at a time you both were.....so did he?"

"Did he what?"

"Come on your face." Niall said cheekily.

Zayn elbowed Niall straight in the ribs. "I'm not talking about this in the middle of the fucking street."

"Fair enough......but did he?” Niall persisted.

"I''m not telling.......but I will say that I don't have such smooth skin for nothing.” Zayn said, bringing Niall’s hand up to his face to feel.

"Yes I knew it!" Niall said triumphantly.

"I'm joking you dick." Zayn laughed.

"Got my hopes up then."

"You often think about people coming on my face Niall?" Zayn sniggered.

"Oh shut up. I'm just taking an interest."

"An interest on whether people come on my face."

"Right end of conversation."

"Yes, I win." Zayn said, high fiving himself. 

"Why are we friends again." Niall sighed.

"Like I said before, you love me."

"That I do Zayn for my sins, that I do."

"Love you too mate.This thing with Harry, we'll sort it out so try not to worry too much." Zayn said, noting the concern on Niall's face,

"You didn't see his face though, he looked really gutted, like people have been judging him all his life and now his new roommate does too." Niall said dejectedly.

"Right this is the plan." Zayn said, clapping his hands. "We'll get to the room, you'll apologise, then I'll apologise for you and explain you didn't mean it and how you're actually decent and not a prick."

"Do you think that'll work?" Niall said hopefully.

"We can only try Niall, and then if that fails we'll take him to the pub to meet Louis and Liam and get him drunk. Then he'll see what immature dicks you all are and it'll all be fine."

"I hope so Zayn I really do. I don't want to spend a whole year with a roommate who hates me."

Zayn stopped and pulled Niall into a hug. "No one hates you Niall, like absolutely no one. You're the loveliest person I know."

"Thanks Zayn."

"Come on then we're here now. Let's go charm your roommate." Zayn said, pulling Niall along with him.

 

****************

Harry had one last box to empty and it was the most important in terms of his academic study, as it was some text books he’d managed to buy second hand. He placed them on his chest of drawers for the minute and picked up Ella, his guitar. He sat on the bed strumming a few random melancholy chords. Harry wasn't prone to feeling sad usually, but times like today when Niall had judged him instantly for the school he had been to made him feel particularly blue. He knew that people would treat him differently, he was a scholarship kid, he came from a totally different background than most of the student body. However, he'd perhaps naively hoped the judgement wouldn't come from his roommate before class had even started. 

Harry put the Ella down and picked his phone up toying with the idea of phoning Gemma before putting it back down again. It was his first day and he refused to cry on the phone to his sister, maybe tomorrow but not today. Suddenly the door flew opened and Niall stumbled in, despite all the boxes now being cleared away. 

"Fuck, shit, bollocks."Niall exclaimed.

"Smooth Niall, real smooth." Zayn laughed.

Harry looked up from Niall's sprawling figure on the floor to see what surely must be a figment of his imagination. It was simply not possible for any human to look like that. He shut his eyes certain in the knowledge that when he opened them the vision standing in his doorway would have disappeared. Harry counted to three before opening his eyes again, but no, there was still an impossibly beautiful boy standing there. 

Harry knew he was gawping at the boy, but he couldn't stop looking. His cheekbones alone were frankly ridiculous and as for his eyelashes, they were so long. Harry had never seen anything like that before. The boy's face was perfect, which is a word that is often used incorrectly but on this occasion it was accurate. Harry couldn't be sure, but he thought there might be a freckle in the boy's eye, he wanted to get closer to see but didn't for fear of coming off odd.

Zayn was also staring at the boy opposite him. Niall had obviously left something out of their conversation. His eyes alone were enough for Zayn, a perfect green that had images of Zayn's childhood garden flashing through his mind.

"Earth to Harry, earth to Zayn, what the fuck is going on?" Niall said from where he was sitting on the floor.

"Two minutes Niall, I'll be back in two minutes." Zayn said, before leaving the room.

Don't go Harry wanted to say, but he could hardly say that to someone he didn't know. Instead he just sat on the bed waiting for Niall to speak.

 

****************

Zayn stood outside Niall and Harry's bedroom. "I'm going to fucking kill Niall, I will actually bury that little fuckers body in our back garden and let Misty piss all over him. I'm so fucked." One thing not many people knew about Z is that he’s a romantic. He defied every stereotypical, preconceived, and outdated notion of what a romantic should look like with his tattoos and piercings. Underneath the carefully crafted exterior beat the heart of someone who believed in love at first sight, who believed that love conquers all, and someone who believed that just maybe a scholarship kid could end up with someone who had so much money it overwhelmed him at times. 

Zayn's parents had been together for what felt like forever, and there was no doubt in Zayn's mind that they loved each other just as fiercely as they did on the day they got married. Zayn wanted that, he wanted it all. 

Cool,calm, and laid-back were three words Zayn's friends often used to describe him. Looking at him now, flustered, panicked and sweaty were more appropriate. Zayn took his phone out of his pocket and rang Niall.

"Where are you?" Niall said.

"In the hallway."

"What the fuck? Why?"

"Because Niall." Zayn sighed.

"What sort of answer is that.I'm coming....."

"Stay there a minute you little fucker. Why didn't you tell me?"

"Tell you what? I don't understand what is happening here. Are you alright?"

"Of course I'm not alright Niall. Why didn't you mention about Harry?"

"I did! I told you what happened earlier." 

"No not about that, about him."

"Specifics mate."

"Just......fuck....like.....he's like.....he's really hot, and just he's stunning yeah, and fuck me he's got curls and...you didn't...."

"Hang on." Niall said.

The phone went dead and Zayn looked up to see Niall emerging into the corridor. 

"Right, get it the fuck together mate you're supposed to be helping me sort shit out with Harry and you can't do that if you are freaking out in the corridor. Yes he's hot, yes he has curls, take a deep breath and let's sort this out and we can all go and get a beer together." Niall said gripping Zayn's shoulders.

"Fine, but don't leave me alone with him at the pub." Zayn pleaded.

"Scared you'll try and jump him." Niall said, gently pushing Zayn.

"Hardly, at this point it'll be an effort to look at him let alone talk to him or anything else." The sound of the door creaking open made them both jump as Harry's head poked out the door.

"Hi, is everything alright? I mean if you need the room to talk I can go out for a coffee."

"Nah mate it's fine, Zayn here was just have a minor freak out about the start of term. All good now though, how about we go back inside because we wanted a quick chat with you."

Harry went back inside the room swiftly followed by Niall dragging a reluctant Zayn with him. The three of them stood in the room with Zayn resolutely looking at anything but Harry.

"Ok, so Harry, I just wanted to apologise for my behaviour earlier. I promise you I'm not a snob I just got a shock and I was being a dick so I'm really really sorry and please come out with us to the pub. I feel like we got off on the wrong foot, and that's on me so I'll buy your drinks tonight."

"What because I can't afford them being a scholarship kid!" Harry said trying not to get angry.

"Shit, that's not what I.....look I really didn't...fuck...Zayn, seriously are you going to be any help here?"

"Sorry, yeah so what Niall said, he's not a snob, at all. Genuinely." Zayn managed to get out, his eyes resolutely on the floor.

"The thing is Zayn." Harry said with as much disdain as he could manage. "Is that your words would be more sincere if you actually looked at me when you're speaking."

Zayn felt his skin heat up at Harry's words, he raised his head and braved looking at him. Oh fuck. He hoped Harry couldn't hear his audible gulp as he gazed into Harry's almost unnatural green eyes. "Sorry." Zayn took a deep breath before speaking again. "I was being sincere, Niall is probably the loveliest person I know. Not a bad bone in his body."

"Don't tell the girls that though Harry, they like the bad boys." Niall chipped in.

"Niall you are about as far removed from a bad boy as you can possibly get, you're like an overly excited puppy sometimes mate."

Harry couldn't help letting out a giggle at Zayn's description of Niall. Adorable, that was the only word Zayn could think of. He was royally fucked. 

"As I was saying before Niall's rude interruption, he really didn't mean it, he rang me as soon as he left here he was so mortified with what happened. Please forgive him or else I won't hear the end of it for weeks and he'll be moping around here like a sad puppy. He really is sorry and he certainly does not think less of you because you have a scholarship. In fact I would hazard a pretty strong guess that Niall and the rest of us, who hopefully you'll meet later, are really impressed that you are smart enough to get a scholarship. They're few and far between and you had the brains and drive to land one.That's pretty stellar mate. So Harry, think you can cut my boy here some slack."

Harry was silent for a minute considering Zayn's request.

"Please Harry." Zayn said, trying really hard not to flutter his eyelashes at him.

Harry looked up and smiled at Zayn. "Bet you can get anything with that face of yours."

Niall burst out laughing, whilst Zayn looked at the floor in order Harry couldn't see the embarrassment written all over it. 

"Sorry, that was inappropriate of me. I accept Niall's apology and I'd be happy to join you all for drinks." Harry smiled at them.

Zayn looked up again and saw Harry's smile with accompanying dimples. For a second it felt like he couldn't breathe, because looking at Harry was just too much. "Great, so my work is done. I'll leave you both alone to sort out your making up." He turned to walk away before Harry's voice stopped him.

"Erm Zayn, will you be at the pub later? Just anxious for another familiar face besides Niall." Harry said shakily, hoping Zayn didn't realise the actual reason he wanted him there.

"Not sure, I've got some pre-course reading to do." Zayn said, hoping the lie wasn't obvious.

"Oh right, yeah course sorry." Harry mumbled.

"But, it was lovely to meet you Harry. Probably see you around now you're Niall's roommate." Zayn said, smiling softly at Harry.

"I'd like that." Harry said smiling widely at Zayn, his dimples on full display,

"Niall walk me out yeah?"

"Fine." Niall said. "I'll be back in a bit Harry." Niall and Zayn walked out leaving Harry sitting on the bed.

Zayn waited until they were far enough away from the bedroom before speaking. "Dimples Niall, you couldn't drop that into the conversation either no?"

"You honestly think I notice stuff like that? Come on Zayn. Besides he never smiled at me the way he did just then." Niall said teasingly.

"Really?" Zayn said, trying to appear casual.

"Yes and what is all this shit about pre-course reading. You've done all your reading."

"He makes me flustered alright, and I didn't think I could spend the whole evening out with him. I don't want to embarrass myself and I know I wouldn't be able to talk to him properly, and then it would be awkward. He's also a first year, he doesn't want some second year fawning all over him. I'm going to stay in tonight and let you and the boys take him down the pub. Maybe next time." 

"Definitely next time, otherwise whatever this is will only get worse mate." 

"Besides, he might not even like boys and I don't want to embarrass myself." Zayn said sadly.

"Seriously Zayn, even I'm a bit gay for you."

"Fuck you."

"You wish pretty boy."

Zayn pushed Niall over. "Twat."

"You love me really."

"Yes unfortunately I do." Zayn said, pulling Niall up off the floor.

"Not like how you love Harry though."

Zayn was tempted to drop him back to the floor. "I've only just met him, I don't love him Niall."

"Yet." Niall said jokingly.

Even though Zayn had only met Harry for what was most likely less than fifteen minutes total, he knew there was already a very good chance that Niall was right.


	5. Chapter 5

Harry lay face down on his bed thinking about Zayn, more specifically about how someone could have a face as perfect as he did. Harry had never seen anyone like him before. He was beautiful and all Harry could think was he hoped he hadn't embarrassed himself by staring at him. 

All of a sudden the realisation that Zayn would be at the pub later kicked in. Harry leapt off the bed and walked over to his wardrobe. "What the fuck I am going to wear." He began frantically pulling out everything he had unpacked from the boxes earlier, his thoughts racing. "Get it together, he's just a boy. Yes a beautiful boy, but that's beside the point. He's still a human just like you.....maybe not one who talks to himself like this, but human all the same. Fuck." 

Harry stared at the clothes on his bed. "Ok, black skinny jeans, they say casual and I know they make my legs look good, doesn't look like I'm trying to impress even though clearly I am. Now what top to wear.....band tshirt? Rolling Stones? Pink Floyd? No wait, are they a bit too try hard for a night at the pub with Niall and the impossibly beautiful boy? I mean they're second years, I'm just a first year. Can't be too eager." H picked up the Rolling Stones tshirt and pulled it over his head and looked in the mirror. "Not too shabby, and I can actually list their albums, oh fuck it this will have to do, I need to shower and sort my hair out." 

Harry grabbed his towel and slipped into the bathroom. He squeezed out of his jeans and tshirt, grabbed his shampoo and shower gel and got in the shower. Harry tried to let thoughts of Zayn escape with the water running off him but it was no good. 

"I mean he might have a boyfriend, or a girlfriend and then I've got no chance unless he's bi, could he be bi? In which case I would still be in the running, but wait no because if he has a boyfriend/girlfriend/partner/significant other" Harry's hand slashed through the air after each word. "Then I have no chance because he's already attached/taken/snapped up/ensnared/trapped with someone, someone who isn't me. Fuck me I really need to stop talking to myself, what if Niall had come in and heard me wittering on about his mate, that would have been so mortifying." 

Harry knew this was a nerves thing, he'd done it when he was a child and rather than filter his thoughts and keep them in his head they all came spilling out, some at the most inopportune time. There was an incident involving Gemma, the boy next door, and Harry that Gemma refused to talk about even to this day. It hadn't happened for so long that Harry had almost convinced himself it had gone away, but then he hadn't been this nervous around someone in a long time. "Gemma would rip the absolute piss out of me if she could hear me."

"Harry did you say something?"

"Fuck." Harry hadn't even heard Niall come back in. He really hoped Niall hadn't heard him chatting away to himself about Zayn. 'Nah just singing a bit in the shower, I didn't think anyone was in." Please believe me Harry said to himself.

"Just got back from walking Zayn home. So you sing then?"

"Well.....erm....hang on a sec let me get out the shower and we can finish chatting." Harry rinsed the shampoo from his hair and stood there for a couple more minutes letting the water run down his body until he felt fully relaxed. He wrapped his hair up in a towel the way both Anne and Gemma did, before drying off and slipping his boxers on. If Niall had still been out he wouldn't have bothered, but he didn't want to push his roommate too far on his first day, after all everyone had different levels of comfort. When it came to nudity, Harry was firmly on the side of let it all hang out. He picked up his outfit for the pub and walked back into the room to find Niall laying on his own bed drinking a bottle of beer and scrolling through his phone. "Alright Niall.'

Niall looked up from his phone and immediately spat his beer out. "Jesus fuck."

"Oh shit I'm sorry, I knew I should have put more clothes on".

"I don't give a fuck about your lack of clothes mate, you can walk around naked for all I care." Although maybe not when Zayn is around Niall thought, laughing on the inside.

"Thank God, I hate clothes after a shower unless I'm leaving straight away. I just didn't want to freak you out."

"Take more than a glimpse of your cock mate to freak me out. I went to private school for fucks sake."

Harry did a silent fist pump in his head. Plus point for Niall. "So why did you spit out your beer? Was it my hair turban? It's the only way I can get it dry?"

"Hair turban? I've never heard it called that before, but no that's not why I spat the beer out."

"Then why? Have I still got shower gel on me or something?" Harry said trying to turn around and see his back.

"No it's nothing like that. You'd think by now I'd have learnt not to judge a book by its cover. When I first saw you, you were like a cute little kitten with your hair all over that place. Now look at you, all tatted up with your abs and all that going on.” Niall said before gesturing to Harry’s stomach and chest, and then his biceps.

“Eyeing me up were you Niall, I knew you'd succumb to my charms eventually.”

“Just wasn't expecting them that's all, you'd give Zayn a run for his money with all your tattoos.”

Harry felt his heart stutter at Niall's words. Tattoos were one of his weaknesses. Trying to sound as calm and relaxed as possible he began to quiz Niall. “So Zayn has tattoos as well?”

“Shitloads, you'll see them at some point I'm sure.”

Harry hoped beyond belief that was true. “Are they quite visible then?” Zayn had been wearing a hoodie and jeans earlier so he couldn’t really see any.

“Some of them.”

Fuck, but Harry already wanted to see the ones that were not visible.

“How about you, any hidden under your boxers?” Niall joked.

“Wouldn't you like to know Niall, I've got keep some secrets.”

“I'll just have a proper look next time you are swanning around naked”.

“Advance warning Niall, get too close I might poke your eye out if you know what I mean.”

Niall let out what could only be described as a snort. "You're going to be fun Harry I just know it. Now get some clothes on we've got a pub calling us.”

 

****************

Zayn lay on his bed giving Misty the hugs he'd promised earlier. "You should have seen him Mist, he was just.....like...fuck..he was beautiful and he's got fucking dimples babe and you know that's my weakness. Well that and tattoos, but I could barely look at his face let alone anywhere else so who knows on that score. I mean he's probably got a girlfriend or boyfriend, and I know I don't stand a chance, but fuck, just once I want to find someone who loves me as much I love them. I know, I know Misty you don't have to tell me it's far too early to be talking about love, and yes you're right I don't really know anything about him apart from his name, oh and the fact that he's smart, he's got a scholarship did I already say that? Well he has, so he must be determined, and brave too, to take up a scholarship here away from his family." 

Misty let our a particularly loud purr as Zayn ran his fingers through her fur. "Yes you may well ask why aren't I going to the pub then, and honestly I can't. I already told Niall I don't want to embarrass myself. I'm not good with small talk and it'll be awkward and I don't want to make him uncomfortable so it's Netflix for me and you tonight Mist." Zayn looked up as his bedroom door opened to find Louis standing there leaning comfortably against the wall.

"Fuck you is it Netflix and the cat. Get your arse off the bed and into something spectacular. Now."

"Listen Lou I can't really, I've got pre-course reading to do as well."

"Bullshit. Niall has already spoken to me and I know that's bollocks so get up now, and also don't lie to me, we don't do that.”

"Sorry babe."

"Don't apologise, just don't do it again. Niall has already filled me in on his hot new roommate so come on, now. Oh, and stop having deep and meaningfuls with the cat. It doesn't give a crap and would happily scratch your face off given half the chance.”

"I'd scratch half your face off given half the chance."

"Good comeback Zayn, really. Now get up before I drag your arse out of bed myself."

"I really don't want to Lou.”

"Why?" 

"Because." Zayn huffed,

"What are you, twelve? Come on Zayn don't be a dick, I'll make sure he's at one end of the table and you're at the other, There'll be five of us, you can easily avoid conversation and we won't leave you alone with him."

“Promise?"

"Not even if Liam wants to blow me in the bathroom."

"Ever the romantic Lou."

"Always. So.....is that a yes?"

"Fine." Zayn reluctantly said. "Sorry Misty, no cuddles for you, blame nasty Louis for that."

"Fuck off and stop stalling. Get your bony arse up and in some skinny jeans so we can get some beer.”

"Erm rude mate. Just because you're got a big arse no need to body shame those of us who don't."

"Pretty sure you've never had trouble pulling anyway Zayn, and you just said I've got a big arse."

"That's a fact."

"Whatever, just get the fuck up. I'm giving you ten minutes then I'm going to send Liam in to get you and he'll quiz you relentlessly about Harry.”

"For fucks sake did Niall tell everybody.” Zayn said with a sigh.

"He's not called big mouth Horan for nothing."

Zayn jumped off the bed and changed back into his skinny jeans from earlier. “Done."

"What about your hair?"

Zayn looked in the mirror, grabbed some product off the bedside table, scooped some onto his fingers before running them through his hair. "Is that better for his majesty.”

"Perfect. Now let's go impress a fresher." Louis laughed at Zayn's put upon sigh before grabbing his hand. "I'm just getting all the teasing out the way before we get to the pub. You know I'd never do anything to embarrass you right?"

"Lou you've been embarrassing me since we were six years old, I wouldn't expect you to stop now."

"I know that, but like I think that maybe Harry could be important to you."

"You've not even met him yet.” Zayn said shaking his head.

"Zayn you were talking to Misty about him, you only talk to her about important stuff. God knows that cat must know your deepest darkest secrets by now."

"I've met him once Louis, once."

"Yeah and you've been freaking out about meeting him twice since you got in. I just, I know you fall  
fast Zayn, so be careful."

"This is why I don't want to meet him again. I don't want to give myself a chance to let that happen, and what if he's straight. Falling for straight boys suck." In Zayn's last year of sixth form he'd fallen hard for one of the boys in his art class. It didn't end well and Zayn had spent most of his first year at Oxford avoiding any sort of intimate relationships despite the other boys constant pleas.

"One you don't know if he is straight, two you don't know if he is straight and finally.....say it Zayn."

"I don't know if he is straight.” Zayn parroted.

"There you go. On that note a little bird..."

“Niall."

"A little Irish bird told me that Harry seemed to take an interest in the fact you had tattoos."

"Maybe he's a wannabe tattoo artist.”

"Or maybe he wants to see what's under that long sleeve top you're wearing, in which case..." Louis let go of Zayn's hand and grabbed a sleeveless top off the floor. "Here."

"I'm not wearing just that."

"Fine." Louis picked out a red plaid shirt from Zayn’s wardrobe and handed it to him. "There. If it gets hot you can take it off and reveal all your tattoos. I'll monitor Harry’s reaction."

"That's ridiculous."

"Is it? Come on, please. Do it for me."

Zayn pulled his long sleeve tshirt off before sliding on the sleeveless one followed by the plaid shirt. 

"Happy now?"

"Ecstatic.Now move it."

Zayn and Louis walked out of the bedroom, Zayn grabbing his phone and money before they headed downstairs to a waiting Liam.


	6. Chapter 6

The Queen’s Arms was the oldest pub in Oxford and was popular amongst the students. It was also fairly relaxed which is why Niall thought it would be good to take Harry there for his first pub visit.

Niall and Harry were sitting at a table at the back of the pub already two beers in, both of them nervous for different reasons. Niall because he was aware he'd fucked up badly earlier when Harry had told him he was a scholarship kid, and Harry for two reasons. One, he was meeting new people and he wanted to make a good impression, especially as Niall was going to be his roommate for the next year, and two was Zayn. The conversation hadn't exactly been flowing so far, neither of them wanting to upset the other.

"Are you usually this subdued Niall?"

"Fuck no.” Niall replied.

Harry laughed. "Just with me then."

"It's not you Harry."

"Oh the old 'it's not you, it's me' line. I've only know you for about an hour Niall and you're already giving me the brush off. I didn't even get a kiss out of it." Harry couldn't help but smile at the look of concern on Niall's face.

"I didn't mean it like that.” Niall hastily said.

"I know, I'm just trying to break the tension."

"Well you know what would break the tension?"

"What?" Before Harry knew what was happening Niall had launched himself at Harry and landed a big sloppy kiss on his mouth.

"There's your kiss mate.” Niall said proudly.

Harry burst out laughing before an unfamiliar voice interrupted.

"Can't leave you alone for five minutes Niall. I mean I know you love fuck a fresher week, but I didn't realise you'd broadened your horizons to boys now as well. God help Oxford is all I can say."

"Louis, took your time didn't you."

"Apparently enough time for you to start getting off with this curly haired chap who I assume is your roommate, going from your description."

"Hi I'm Harry." 

"Good to meet you mate." Louis sat down beside Niall and took a swig of his beer.

"Dick."

“Oh shush Niall."

"Where's Liam and Zayn?"

"Zayn is outside finishing off his fag and Liam is keeping him company. They'll be in soon. Stop distracting me Niall from the real issue at hand. Why you were getting off with Harry?”

"That's not what was happening." Harry said in a panic.

"Calm down mate, I don't really give a shit either way. I just like teasing your roommate, and you seem like someone who has way more taste then to get off with Niall."

"Who was getting off with Niall?” Zayn walked in and heard the tail end of the conversation.

Oh great thought Harry, why did Zayn have to walk in at that moment. He didn't want Zayn to think he was getting off with anyone let alone one of Zayn's friends.

"I walked in to find Niall all up on Harry, proper getting it on they were."

"Oh right...erm....yeah....ok....don't really want to imagine Niall and Harry together thanks very much." Zayn said casting his eyes to the ground.

Harry bristled at the implication behind Zayn's words. "Do you have some sort of problem with two blokes together."

Zayn looked up to see the glare on H's face. "What!"

"This should be good." Louis muttered under his breath to Niall.

"You know Zayn it's 2016 and not the middle ages." Harry said indignantly.

"Harry.....I...."

"I know I've only just met you all, but so far I'm not getting a very good impression. First Niall with the scholarship stuff and now you with the homophobia." Harry could feel his heart pounding and his anger building. "I'm gay so if you have a problem with that then don't come and visit Niall when I'm there because I'm not changing my behaviour to suit anyone." Harry looked away because he couldn't bear to see what looked like hurt on Zayn's face, and if anyone had a right to be hurt it was Harry not bloody Zayn with his impossible beauty and homophobic attitude.

"Right well, if that's how you feel I'll just leave now then.” Zayn said.

"Fine." Harry huffed.

"Fine" Zayn murmured. Before he could flounce off in a strop Louis grabbed his wrist. 

"Stop. This has got way out of hand. Don't be a dick Zayn."

"Excuse you, but you aren't the one being called a homophobe.” Zayn said, his voice getting louder

"If the cap fits mate." Harry blurted out. He knew you could never trust the pretty ones.

"Harry you stop being a dick too. What Zayn said about you and Niall is so far beyond how you took it."

“Really? He said he didn't want to think about the two of us together, couldn't be more blatant than that." Harry could see the hurt and anger in Zayn's eyes but he couldn't look away.

"If that's what you think, not much more I can really do about it is there."

"Oh for god's sake Zayn stop being so stubborn and tell him.” Louis said.

"Tell me what?" Harry couldn't help the look of confusion.

"Yeah, I'd rather not thanks, so you can let go of my wrist now Lou I'm going home."

Choruses of 'don't be stupid, stay Zayn' rang out from Niall, Louis and Liam.

"I'll catch up with you all some other time, well maybe not you Harry." Zayn said sadly.

Harry definitely didn't miss the sadness in Zayn's voice that time. Louis reluctantly let go of Zayn''s wrist, he knew Zayn was far too stubborn to stay now.

"See you later boys." Zayn said as he turned around and left.

Harry watched as Zayn trudged out of the pub, a sad slump to his shoulders. All the boys turned to Harry and their gaze made Harry shrink back into the corner.

"Well that was a great big fucking mess. Harry as your roommate I feel I get extra special privileges and you really need to go after Zayn now."

"I'd rather not if it's all the same to you." 

"Harry believe me you want to go after him. I'm not bullshitting you, and you'll regret it if you don't. Zayn is genuinely one of the best people I've ever know. Promise. Get your curly arse up and go talk to him." Niall said.

"So, was he not being homophobic?” Harry asked the boys.

"Far from it." Niall said quietly. "Please Harry. Look when Zayn is in a mood he ambles along so he won't have gone far. You'll catch him up in no time."

"Really?"

"Go on curls, you'll kick yourself if you don't. Like Niall said, Zayn is the best, truly. I know I've only just met you so really you have no reason to take my word for anything, but seriously mate just go." Louis implored.

"Right ok." Harry maneuvered himself up from the seat and looked at the four boys surrounding him.

"GO!!!" they all shouted as one.

"Jesus, alright." Harry walked away from the boys and headed out the front door of the pub. He looked left but no sign of Zayn, then right and saw what could have been Zayn in the distance. Harry took a chance and began to jog towards the figure, gaining on him with every pace until finally he was alongside him. “Zayn."

"Look Harry, if you've just come to give me another bollocking for something I'm not guilty of then I'd actually like you to just fuck off in all honesty." Zayn felt like he had obviously misjudged Harry. Fooled by a pretty face. That could be the title of Zayn’s autobiography at this rate.

"I just, I wanted to know what your remark meant. I thought it was offensive, but the others say you're not like that and made me come after you.”

“Fine.” Thank goodness for his friends. “What I meant was I didn't want to imagine you and Niall together because it would be like imagining your sibling with someone. I don't want to imagine him with you, or Louis, or Liam, or Sally who works behind the bar, or Tanya in my art class, or Ben who lives next door to me."

“Oh."

"Yeah. You didn't really give me much of a chance to explain you just went on the attack a bit."

"Sorry, it's a defence mechanism.” Harry said quietly.

"I get that.”

"With respect you're not gay Zayn, so I'm not sure you do."

"You're right I'm not. I am bi though so I get flak from all angles mate."

"Fuck. Shit, I'm....god....I always do this....I just rush into saying stuff and like maybe I should have given you a chance to explain but I didn't I just let my mouth run away with me. It's my first day meeting you all and I've already fucked it up.Now everyone is going to hate me, Niall won't want to share a room with me anymore. I'll end up living with someone called Tarquin who likes hunting and shooting, and who hates scholarship kids, and I'll have to go back home and disappoint my family and all I want to do is enjoy my time here and make friends I'll know forever and I feel like I've ruined that now." 

Zayn stared at this boy who spoke with the slowest voice he'd heard, his eyes landing on Harry's downturned mouth. 'Harry?"

H kept his eyes firmly cast towards the pavement.

"Hey Harry, look at me."

"I'm embarrassed.” Harry said, as he still continued looking down at the pavement.

Zayn reached out and grasped Harry's elbow. "Please." Harry looked up and Zayn could see the embarrassment all over his face. "You've got nothing to be embarrassed about Harry, you thought I was being homophobic and despite the fact it was your first night here and you were probably worried about fitting in, you still called me out on it. That's fucking admirable.”

"Really?"

"Course. I mean you had no clue, you don't know anything about me we've only just met."

"I'm sorry for thinking that about you."

"It's all good." 

"Will you come back to the pub with me? I'll buy you a beer."

"Well if there's a beer in it then I'm in."

Zayn and Harry began slowly wandering back to the pub neither of them appearing to be in any rush, both comfortable with the silence. It didn't feel awkward, it just felt normal. They'd almost reached their destination when Harry finally spoke. "What are you studying?"

"Art and English."

Harry let out what could only be described as giggle. Adorable thought Zayn yet again. "Erm what was that for?"

"Just if I could have guessed one subject for you it would have been art."

"Yeah yeah yeah, I've heard it all before. Tortured artist look all that shit.” Zayn smiled used to this by now.

"Yeah obviously, but that's not all I was going to say."

"Oh, sorry."

"I was going to say that I know I've only met you a couple of times, but both times you looked at me like you were taking all of me in. Like even when we were in the pub and I was cross with you or back there just now you looked at me like you were kinda memorising parts of my face and like the structure of it and that's something I always imagine artists doing when they are getting ready to draw.:

Zayn pondered his response, he knew he wouldn't be able to say what he was actually thinking, that he only did that with Harry's face and no one else's. "You've got an interesting face." Fuck's sake Zayn thought, interesting face what a great compliment.

"Interesting, mmmm not sure how to take that if I'm honest. Interesting in a good way or interesting in a bad way like when people are trying to be painfully polite."

Zayn let his eyes roam over Harry's face taking in his long nose, his plump red lips that he wanted to bite, and eyes like no others he had seen before. "In a good way Harry."

Harry beamed at Zayn. "Well alright then. I'll take that. Now can I buy you a drink, make up for earlier?"

"Nothing to make up for, but I'll take the beer anyway." Zayn opened the door and held it open for Harry. "After you.”

"Proper gentleman eh."

"You've no idea mate." Harry laughed as he made his way to the bar and Zayn went to find the other boys who were still tucked away in their usual booth.

"Ah the wanderer returns. Did you Harry kiss and make up then?" Louis drawled before throwing a wink Zayn's way. 

"Yes we've made up."

"No kisses?"

"Shut up Louis."

"Not yet at least."

"Shut up Niall."

"Wait, does Zayn like Harry?"

"Shut up Liam.” Three voices said in harmony.

"Alright it was only a question." Liam mumbled. Louis placed his hand on Liam's thigh and gently squeezed.

"Sorry Li, make up blow job later? I'll even do that thing you like with my fingers."

"Please don't, I'll never get any sleep otherwise." Zayn muttered.

"Poor baby. I'll try and be quiet, I'll use the gag if necessary."

"There are so many things I don't want to know about your sex life Lou and gags is one of them." 

"Oh shut up Zayn you're just jealous because you're not getting any. Don't forget I slept in the room next to you and Anna when we were away on that English trip at college. What were her words again 'oh yes sir right there, right fucking there' followed by noises two fucking foxes would be proud of."

"You are so full of shit Louis, never once did she call me Sir."

"The fucking foxes part is right though, thank fuck for noise reducing headphones."

Harry chose that moment to return with two beers for himself and Zayn. "Ooh are we talking about wildlife, big fan. Although not so much fucking foxes they make the loudest noises, it's really quite disconcerting when you hear them."

Zayn looked at Harry fondly, Harry had used the words fucking foxes and disconcerting in the same sentence. He was really quite something, although maybe hanging out with the others had skewed his perception of the vocabulary that people use.

"I was actually comparing Zayn fuc......" Zayn's hand shot out and covered Louis’ mouth before he could finish the sentence, casting a glare at the other two boys with an implied warning of what would happen if they finished Louis’ sentence off for him.

"No one needs to hear that Lou, now if I take my hand away from your mouth will you be quiet?" 

"Didn't realise you and Louis were into roleplaying" Niall quipped.

Zayn took his hand away from Louis’ mouth allowing Zayn to give Nial the finger, followed swiftly by a big' fuck you' from Louis.

"Oh I didn't realise you and Louis were together.” Harry said, sounding affordably confused .

"With Zayn? God no, give me some credit. I mean yes he's beautiful, yes he's not lacking in the cock department, and yes at one time I was responsible for his sexual awakening, but to be honest now it would be like getting off with a relative so no thanks. Zayn is totally single, unattached, companionless, flying solo blah blah blah. You know just in case you were interested."

"For fuck's sake Louis. Harry I apologise for Louis he has no filter, just ignore him that's what I've been doing since we were little."

"Liar you love me." Louis smirked

"Whatever." Zayn couldn't help smiling at his best friend. Shared memories of growing up with Louis flooded his mind. He couldn't wish for a better friend than Louis. He'd been there for Zayn through everything and he trusted him like nobody else.

"Enough of this love fest, this is supposed to be a night to meet my cracking new roommate Harry. Hary you already know Zayn, you met Louis earlier so it's just Liam left and they both live with Zayn. Boys meet Harry.”

"Hi." Harry waved shyly.

"Sit down sit down, I'm sure you've got questions for us." Louis joked.

"Yeah ok."

Niall, Louis, and Liam were sitting in the middle of the table leaving a space on either end for Harry and Zayn. Well that’s what Zayn thought, until Louis gave Zayn a sly grin and moved the three of them up leaving space for both Harry and Zayn to sit together. Zayn shot Louis a quick glare before settling down beside him, swiftly followed by Harry on the end.

"So, I guess like how did you all meet? I mean I know that you, Niall and Zayn knew each other before you all started and that you met Liam here. I don't know how you all knew each other before and how you ending up meeting Louis. 

"Well now young Harold...."

"It's Harry, Loui."

"Harold, Harry it's all the same."

"It's not."

"Practically."

"Not really."

"Seriously H, don't even waste your breath he'll never give up on that." Zayn said with a knowing tone to his voice.

"Listen to Zayn mate, he's known Louis the longest." Niall said.

"Fine, you may continue." Harry smiled.

"As I was saying young Harold before you so rudely interrupted. There was a boy......"

"A very strange enchanted boy?” Harry mumbled.

Louis Liam and Niall all looked at Harry blankly. 

"They say he wandered very far, very far." Zayn muttered. 

Harry's eyes lit up. Did Zayn know this song, he must do surely, so he chanced the next line. "Over land and sea."

"What the actual fuck is happening here." Louis said. "Is this some sort of poem?”

"No Louis, they're lyrics. 'A little shy and sad of eye But very wise was he'."

Harry couldn't hold in his excitement. "I can't believe you know the song. How do you know the song?" Please say Moulin Rouge, please say Moulin Rouge, Harry chanted in his head. 

"Can't remember." Zayn said looking down at the table.

"Bullshit Zayn, you are full of it. You hardly ever forget anything, I should know you've remind me of all the stupid shit we got up to as kids all the time. Spill it Malik."

"Moulin Rouge." Zayn mumbled. Harry's eyes widened slightly and he mentally gave himself a high five. 

"Speak up Zayn seriously, it can't be that embarrassing."

"Moulin Rouge Louis.”

"The Ewan McGregor film?" Louis chuckled.

"Yeah. My mum really loved that film and she used to watch it all the time. Song got stuck in my head didn't it. Not much I could do about it.”

"So you didn't like the film then?" Harry said with a hint of disappointment.

"Was alright. Look can we stop talking about it and get back to Louis’ big grand tale of how we all met please." Zayn grumbled.

"Nah I can't be arsed now grumpy pants. To cut a long long long story short Harry, Zayn and I met at primary school, Niall joined us in secondary, and we met Liam freshers week last year. He liked us enough to stick around so now he lives with me and Zayn, and we have a whole friends with benefits deal going on……"

At that bombshell Harry spat his drink out, with Niall taking the brunt of H's beer. 

“Fucks sake.” 

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry, it was just....like...you know...the whole friends with benefits thing, I was just shocked. I wasn't expecting you to say that, I mean earlier you'd said you and Zayn were like related so I was just surprised is all. I'm really sorry Niall.”

"Hold up curly, don't get your knickers in a twist, that's not the first time Niall has been covered in beer and it won't be the last. Also I was talking about Liam not Zayn so you can rest easy.”

Harry wanted the ground to open up and swallow him, he really hoped he wasn't as transparent about his feelings for Zayn as apparently Louis thought he was. 

"Lou leave him be yeah. You've only just met him, you don't want Harry's overriding impression of you to be that you're a complete tosser" Zayn said, before turning and smiling at Harry. "You want to at least give him the chance to meet you a few more times, before you come to the same conclusion as all of us.”

"What might that conclusion be oh wise one? Funny, witty, hot, great arse, modest......do you want me to go on?"

"No need. I think sarcastic fucker about covers it." Zayn winked at Louis.

"You should be grateful I love you. Now let's stop all this chitter chatter and let's get piss. Cheers." Lo shouted.  
All five boys downed their beers and settled in for a long session.

 

***************

 

The night went by in the blink of an eye for Harry. The instant connection he felt with the other boys was also reciprocated. Harry quietly sipped at his beer, having lost count of how many he'd drunk ages ago. He looked around at the boys as Niall finished off the punchline to a joke. Niall was hilarious, he had such a great outlook on life Harry couldn't imagine him ever feeling unhappy or anyone wanting to hurt him. He was just bright and full of joy. Harry knew that he himself was a happy person, but Harry didn't think even he could beat Niall in the loving life stakes. 

Liam was a bit quieter than the rest in terms of loudness (well compared to Louis and Niall) and seemed lovely, he'd asked Harry lots of questions about Holmes Chapel and what school was like there, and he genuinely seemed interested in Harry's life before he arrived at Oxford. 

Louis was...well..Harry had never met anyone quite like him. He was this non-stop bundle of energy, who was funny and sassy and smart despite trying to play that part of himself down. Then there was the boy sat next to him, the one who Harry found it difficult to look at for any length of time for fear he'd embarrass himself. Apart from the obvious aesthetic beauty that no one could ignore, Zayn was charming. Yes Zayn was a bit quiet at first, but once he opened up he was engaging and listened to Harry as he wittered on about music and his family and endless nonsense that came bubbling out of his mouth through sheer nerves. That someone like Zayn was remotely interested in listening to him was staggering to Harry.

Harry had tried to split his time chatting evenly with them all, but inevitably he was always drawn back to Zayn. They had somehow managed to draw closer to each other as the night progressed, Harry doing his best not to automatically lean into Zayn's side as he grew more comfortable. 

"Right lads, what say we take the party back to Zayn and the double L's house?" Niall shouted.

"Ugh give it up with the double L's Niall, it's never going to catch on." Louis moaned.

"I'm just trying it out, seeing if it sticks."

"He's been trying it out for a year and it hasn't stuck so far." Zayn muttered out the side of his mouth, quiet enough for only Harry to hear. Harry giggled again, he honest to goodness giggled and Zayn was beginning to realise he wanted to hear what other noises he could make come out of Harry's mouth. He was fucked, well and truly. 

Harry was a fresher, he'd only just arrived, and he was Niall's roommate. Zayn knew he couldn't mess this up so he was going to maintain a level of aloofness, he would be perfectly friendly with Harry but that was all. He wanted Harry to enjoy his time here and getting involved with Zayn wouldn't work. Zayn wasn't good at casual hook ups so he didn't want to draw Harry into starting something serious, not in his first year. 

"Fine, let's take this back to Zayn, Louis and Liam's house. Everyone satisfied with that?" With nods from the other boys Niall downed the rest of his pint and they all headed for the door. 

Harry was worried. Zayn hadn't spoken to him since they'd left the pub, not that Zayn gave the impression of being a chatterbox but he'd literally not said one word to him. Harry was walking ahead sandwiched between Niall and Liam whilst Zayn and Louis were hanging back, with Louis' arm slung casually around Zayn's shoulder which had not gone unnoticed by Harry. They're just friends that's all it is, best friends, but not benefit with friends, no wait that's the wrong way round thought Harry, friends with benefits, but it's alright because it's the double L's that are that. Harry snickered at the thought of the double L's and Niall's insistence on getting that to stick as a name.

"What's so funny up front there Curly? Niall and Liam wowing you with their banter." Louis joked.

"No, I just thought of the double L's and couldn't help it." 

"Give me a break Harry." Niall groaned.

"Sorry mate. I'm so drunk I think I'm finding anything and everything hilarious." Harry replied.

"Yeah that's usually the only reason people find Niall entertaining, they're drunk." Louis said before hitting Niall around the head.

"Rude fucker, anymore of that and I won't make my famous roast potatoes next week."

Louis instantly dropped to his knees in front of Niall and grabbed his thighs. "Please Niall don't withhold the potatoes from me, anything but that."

Harry and Liam chuckled whilst Zayn looked on fondly at Louis on his knees in the middle of the pavement. "Get up Lou you absolute tit."

"But it's Niall's potatoes Zayn, you know how I feel about them." Louis looked back up at Niall. 

"Promise me your potatoes Niall, promise me your salty goodness."

Harry burst out laughing. "That sounds filthy you know that right?"

"Oh he knows. There's nothing more Louis loves than a bit of good old fashioned innuendo." Zayn smiled at him. Harry felt his heart skip a little. Maybe not a whole beat, but there was definitely something there. 

"Lou get up we're almost home and you know there's nothing you could do that would stop Niall making those bloody potatoes for you."

Louis jumped to his feet and gave Niall a hug. "Love your potatoes Nialler".

"I know you do mate. Now enough hugs we're practically at your house now and I can already hear pizza and weed calling. Oh and Misty, can't forget her."

Harry looked at the boys quizzically. "Do you have another flatmate?" No one had mentioned anything at the pub earlier, Harry was sure of it, but then......oh maybe Harry had missed it when he was too busy concentrating on not staring at Zayn. 

"In a sense?" Liam said cryptically. "You'll meet her soon enough."

"Ok". Harry said, still not entirely sure what was happening or what Liam meant. The fresh air was supposed to help clear the alcohol induced fog, but all it seemed to do was make his head even fuzzier. "Are were nearly there yet?"

"Just round the corner mate for the Malik, Tomlinson, and Payne household. Believe me Harry it'll look a lot tidier than our Horan/Styles home. They have a cleaner."

"A cleaner?" Harry said with wonder in his voice. Harry didn't know anyone who had a cleaner, well there had been that one boy Callum in his English class. Callum’s Dad had left and moved in with a younger woman who had insisted on employing a cleaner. It was the talk of the village, well until something equally thrilling had happened, and by thrilling Harry meant painfully dull. 

"Too busy studying for cleaning, and it's not like the three of us can't afford it." Liam casually said.

"Yeah right, good idea." Harry wondered what that would be like, being able to afford whatever you liked including a cleaner. Harry was lucky and talented enough to have been awarded a scholarship for his studies and housing so he didn't have to worry about tuition or accommodation fees. As part of the scholarship Harry was also allocated a monthly stipend for books and a small amount for living expenses. However, the living expenses wouldn't even cover this first night out. Harry had saved most of the money from his part-time job at the bakery back home and Anne, Robin and Des had also contributed some, but Harry knew that if he wanted to enjoy more nights out like this as well as basics such as food he was going to have to find some form of work to survive. Harry knew how to do two things, bake and pull a half decent pint, so he really hoped he could find work at either a bakery or a pub.

"Right this is us. Harold are you alright there, you look deep in concentration."

"Sorry Louis, just the beer." He smiled at Louis, noticing Zayn's puzzled look from the corner of his  
eye. "So is this where I get to meet the mysterious Misty."

"Only if you're very unfortunate." Niall joked. 

"Fuck I came out without my keys, Louis, Liam I really hope one of you remembered.” Zayn said, sounding worried.

Louis pushed up behind Liam and stuck his hand in Liam's pocket. "Yep Mr Sensible has his key, knew you wouldn't let me down love." Louis gave Liam a quick squeeze before removing his hand with the key firmly between his fingers. "Let's get inside and stick those pizza's in the oven, I'm so hungry I'd even eat my own food.”

"Bold statement Louis." Zayn drawled.

"Fuck you Malik." Louis snapped back before opening the front door and beckoning everyone inside. "Harry welcome to our humble abode. Shoes by the door otherwise Jenny our lovely landlady will kick my arse.” 

Harry slipped his boots off and felt his toes sink into the luxurious carpet. He couldn't help the contented sigh slipping out his mouth. 

"For fucks sake not you too Harry. First time we viewed the house Jenny made us all take our shoes off. Zayn nearly came in his pants when his bare feet touched the carpet. True story."

"Is it fuck, that is such an exaggeration you wanker." Zayn elbowed Louis in the stomach. "You wait I've got years worth of untold stories that I can share with Liam. Real embarrassing shit babe."

"You don't scare me. Did you or did you not make the same noise as Harry when you took your shoes off. Truth Zayn.”

Zayn looked down at the carpet. "I may have made a small noise of appreciation, that may have been somewhat similar to the noise that Harry made." Zayn looked back up to see Louis smirking at him and Harry gazing at him with what appeared to be a fond look on his face if he wasn't mistaken.

"See Zayn that wasn't too difficult was it now?"

"Fuck you Lou."

"Well as beautiful as yours and Harry's mutual love of carpets is, can we please sit down and eat some fucking food. I'm starved." Niall whined.

"You're not starved Niall, you're just hungry as always." Zayn said.

"I'm a growing boy mate, all I need is food, alcohol, weed, and the love of a good woman. Now I've only had one of the those things so far tonight, please for the love of Jesus can we rectify that with some food and weed."

Zayn flung his arm around Niall's shoulder. "Come on then babe, let's get you all sorted. Liam shut the door behind you and you can help me put the pizzas in the oven. Louis can skin up and Niall can give Harry a tour of the house.”

"Actually Zayn, as Niall is so hungry why don't Liam and him sort out the food, I'll skin up and you can give Harry a tour of the house, I mean you live here after all it would make more sense. Right?"

Zayn shot a dirty look at Louis, that meddling little shit, but he couldn't really say no because he didn't want to offend Harry. "Sure no problem, like you said that makes more sense." Zayn said whilst thinking of multiple ways he could hurt Louis without leaving any bruises. "Harry did you want to follow me and I'll give you the short guided tour." 

“Yeah sure, maybe I'll get to meet Misty too?" Harry suggested to Zayn. Louis, Liam, and Niall all laughed and wished Harry good luck.

"Misty isn't that bad." Zayn responded to the boys mocking."Ignore them Harry you'll be fine." 

"Zayn will protect you Harry from big bad Misty." Louis sniggered. Zayn shot another glare at Louis before turning again to Harry.

"Come in and welcome to our home." Zayn set off down the hallway with Harry in tow.

"It's much bigger than I thought it would be for a student house." Harry mused as he wandered down the hall with Zayn.

"By bigger do you mean cleaner and posher?”

Harry laughed. "That's exactly what I mean."

"Jenny the landlady is a friend of Louis' Mum and she hooked us up with it. There's actually a spare bedroom too because we'd arranged it all before Niall found out about failing his first year. He still could have shared with us, but he was happy to stay on campus for another year because he likes the vibes.”

"You didn't think about getting another flatmate to share, you know like to help out with the rent?"

"Erm, you know we could kinda....." Zayn looked down at floor because he didn't want to explain to Harry that in all honestly he could probably afford to buy the house himself let alone rent it. 

"Fuck I'm an idiot, course you don't need help with rent. Just ignore me, I forgot who I was with for a minute.'

Zayn could instantly feel his hackles rise, because Harry had made that sound like a bad thing. "What does that mean?" 

Harry heard the unmistakable sound of annoyance in Zayn's voice. "No I didn't mean anything by that, it came out wrong. I just meant, you know like...erm...so I'm not back home and it's different people here and you can afford stuff like rent and not have to worry and then there's me and….."

"It's fine Harry. Maybe we should leave the tour for now and just go eat yeah.”

Harry knew he'd upset Zayn and he didn't mean what he said in a bad way. Zayn began to walk away so Harry reached out and grabbed Zayn by the wrist. As cliche as it sounded he felt a shock as his fingers touched Zayn's skin. 

"Wait, please don't. I didn't mean to upset you, I just, I get flustered sometimes and erm it didn't come out how I meant it....you know a bit like Niall earlier with all the scholarship stuff, he wasn't being rude and neither was I Zayn I promise. Look all I meant was that I'm not used to being around people who don't have to worry about things like rent, and I didn't mean it in a judgey way honest. I would never be rude to people that's just not me and I would never judge anyone on their means or abilities or anything....and like I'm really sorry if that's how it came across because like I said before that wasn't my intention and I would never want to offend anyone, least of all you Zayn because you're like you know and so please accept my apolo......" Before Harry could finish Zayn pushed him against the wall and gently lowered his lips onto Harry's. He felt Zayn's thumbs brushing against his cheekbones, but before Harry had a chance to deepen the kiss and respond he felt Zayn pulling away. "Wait." He looked at Zayn and could see the mortification all over Zayn's face.

"Oh fuck Harry I'm so sorry. I honestly didn't mean to do that. I should have asked, I virtually leapt on you, I didn't give you any sort of choice in the matter. Fuck. I think we should just go and join the others and Louis or Liam can show you around if you ever decide to come back." Zayn was so embarrassed, he couldn't believe he'd done that after his earlier decision to treat Harry as a friend. He'd been alone with him for five minutes and he'd just fucking pounced on the poor boy. He knew why he'd done that, it was the rambling, the slow drawling rambling that Harry had engaged in when he was apologising to Zayn, and Zayn had repaid that by kissing him.He hurried away down the hall eager to get back to the boys. 

"Zayn wait." Harry wasn't bothered that Zayn had kissed him, he was bothered that Zayn felt so guilty about it. "Please."

"I'd rather not talk about it Harry if I'm honest, I'm really embarrassed." Zayn couldn't even look at Harry at this point.

"Zayn I don't even…."

Louis popped his head around the kitchen door. "Tour all finished yeah, good because we're done skinning up and pizza's are on the go. Get your arses in here."

"Actually Lou I don't feel so good." Zayn mumbled.

"What's up mate?" Louis looked concernedly at Zayn.

I'm dying of embarrassment on the inside and can't bear to be around Harry for fear of humiliating myself further. "Just a headache I think. I'm going to get my head down and I should be alright tomorrow."

"Are you sure, there's a spliff with your name on it in there." Louis said trying to tempt Zayn in. He knew something was wrong with Zayn and it was not a headache, but he didn't want to call Zayn out on it in front of Harry.

"As tempting as that sounds I think I just need a good nights kip, but cheers mate." Zayn just needed to get to his room and mope in the darkness with Misty as company.

"Alright, but if you need anything then just shout. Harry why don't you head into the kitchen and help Li and Niall with the food."

"Ok, night Zayn. See you around?" Harry said hesitantly.

"Yeah night." Zayn glanced at Harry for a second before looking back down at the carpet. 

"Bye then." 

"Bye Harry." Zayn didn't look as Harry trudged into the kitchen so he wouldn't have seen the despondent look on Harry's face or the slump of his shoulders. 

"Are you going to tell me what's really wrong with you?" Louis whispered to Zayn.

"Not now, we can talk tomorrow though." Zayn said before Louis pulled him in for a hug.

"Are you sure? I can sack off the weed and we can chat now?"

"Nah you're alright babe, I just want to go to bed and forget, but thanks you're a really good mate when you're not being a dick.”

"Rude but I'll take it as a compliment." Louis pulled back from Zayn and studied his face. "I do worry about you sometimes."

"I know, but it's nothing serious just embarrassing, I'll explain tomorrow."

"Love you Malik."

"You too Tommo." Zayn kissed Louis on the cheek and walked off down the hall to his bedroom.


	7. Chapter 7

Harry was sat in what was probably the most comfortable sofa ever and he should really be appreciating that fact. He should also be appreciating the beer, pizza, good company and the haze of weed that was permeating the air. Yet the only thing Harry was thinking about was Zayn and how upset he had looked earlier, how his beautiful face had been marred by his frown, how his brown eyes looked sad, how he hadn't smiled when he'd said bye to Harry, how he could barely look Harry in the face. 

"Earth to Harry, come in Harry." Niall was sat next to Harry clicking his fingers in front of his face. "Mate are you there.”

Maybe he should find Zayn, yeah maybe he should just go check on him make sure everything was ok, they could talk it out, hug it out, maybe even kiss it out. Harry smiled at the thought of Zayn's lips, of his mouth, his eyes...."Ow what the fuck Niall!" Harry rubbed his leg where Niall had just punched him. "What was that for?”

"I've been trying to talk to you for about 10 minutes, and you've just been sitting there with this blank look on your face looking all spaced out. You do know you've not even smoked right?" Niall laughed.

"Sorry it's the beer and I might not have inhaled mate, but I can barely see you through the fog. You are Niall right?" Harry joked as he reached out and rubbed his hand all over Niall's face.

"Very funny Harry. Are you alright though, you are having fun yeah?" Niall said with concern. Niall knew how difficult it was to arrive somewhere not knowing anyone and trying to make friends. Luckily when he started his new secondary school he met Louis and Zayn and they made everything perfect. He wanted Harry to have the same experience, sure they'd got off on a shaky footing buh he hoped that everything was back on track now. 

"Promise I am Niall, I think I've just had a few too many beers that's all. I'll get my second wind in a minute then i'll be good." Harry said smiling at Niall. 

"Great, because Louis and Liam want to play Fifa if you're up for it?"

"I'm in, I might just pop to the loo first sort myself out." And try and find Zayn at the same time.

"Course, I'll get some more pizza and maybe a water for you." Niall nudged Harry and winked at him.

"Lightweight." Liam shouted from the kitchen where he was currently getting another pizza out of the oven. 

"Ignore him Harry.The first time we took Liam out he drank three beers and a vodka, came home and pissed the bed." Louis said with a smug smile.

"LOU!!! You promised you wouldn't tell that story anymore!"

"Sorry love." Louis said with not a hint of apology in his voice. 

"It was just over excitement that's all." Liam whined.

"Yeah from being in my bed." Louis, Niall and Harry all erupted in laughter.

"Was it fuck, I thought you were a massive prick the first time we met and you know that." Liam said as he carried the freshly baked pizza into the front room.

"I think you meant 'I thought you had a massive prick the first time we met' eh?" Louis said smugly.

"Imagine my disappointment then when I finally got your trousers off." Liam responded.

"Ooh point to Liam. This is fun, screw Fifa let's keep playing this." Niall shouted. 

"No, game over. Fifa and more weed time." Louis sulked. Liam plonked himself down on Louis' lap and grabbed his hand.

"You know I was only joking, I love your cock."

"Shouldn't joke about a man's cock Liam." Louis said grumpily.

"How about I make it up to you later?" Liam gently squeezed Louis' cock through his jeans making Louis gasp.

"Yeah, alright." Louis said placing a gentle kiss to Liam's temple.

"Oi you two, me and Harry are still in the room so let's crack on with FIFA."

"Actually I do really need the loo so can you get me all set up, I won't be long."

"Sure Harry no worries. It's down the hallway second door on the right, just next to Zayn's room."

"Great, cheers Niall." Harry eased himself off the sofa to avoid a head rush and made his way out of the front room and down the hallway to Zayn's room. Alright I can do this thought Harry, he'd just knock on the door and see if Zayn was still upset. No big deal. If Zayn was asleep he'd just turn back around and go back to the boys and hope he'd catch up with him another time. He stood outside Zayn's bedroom door and took a deep breath, but before he could knock he could hear Zayn inside talking to someone.

"Fuck my life Misty, seriously what did I do that for. Harry must hate me, he must think I'm some kind of lech who just throws himself at people. Fuck!!! Well yet another thing I've ruined. We probably can't even be friends anymore and that would be a real shame because he was nice Misty. I know I know you don't have to tell me that word is so generic and overused, but he really is. Yes I know I don't really know him and under those curls and dimples and fucking ridiculous eyes he could be a real cunt, but I don't think he is and I know I've messed it all up, sometimes Mis....." Zayn was suddenly interrupted by a curly haired boy stumbling through his door on shaky legs like a fawn.

"I am nice, I'm not a cunt I prom....." Harry stopped mid-sentence at the sight before him. Zayn was lying on his bed with just a pair of black boxers on and a cat across his chest purring. "Oh......oh god....you're half naked......with tattoos....and a cat." It was almost too much for Harry so he hastily put his hands over his face. "Don't look, don't look, don't look." Harry turned around and faced the door with his hands still over his face. "Don't look, don't look."

"I'm pretty sure the hands over your face mean you can't see, you don't have to face the door as well." Zayn laughed.

"I peeked... I opened my fingers and peeked, so I'm facing the door now so no peeking now, no peeking for Mr Styles." Harry laughed.

"Are you high?"

"No." Harry spluttered indignantly.

"You sound high." 

"No you sound high, you were talking to a cat Zayn Like having a proper conversation with her and everything."

"Your point is?"

"My point is.....my point is....what is my point? Zayn what is my point?" Harry sounded confused.

"I have no fucking clue." Zayn liked this Harry, high Harry was funny and adorable and cute. "Turn round. I can't talk to you properly when you're not facing me."

"Can you maybe put some clothes on first?" Harry knew he couldn't turn around until Zayn was wearing more clothes.

"Sure Harry, whatever you want." Zayn eased Misty off his chest and grabbed his hoodie and trackies from the floor. Zayn watched as Misty began to weave in and out of Harry's legs, his very shapely legs, his long never ending legs.

"Oh is that Misty?"

"No it's me Harry, it's how I interact with everyone who comes into my room. I love a bit of cat roleplay."

"Not helping Zayn." Harry groaned.

“Right I'm dressed, you can stop playing peekaboo now and turn around." Zayn was now sat on the bed with his back against the headboard and his legs stretched out. 

Harry took his hands off his face and turned around to look at Zayn. God did he have to look good in everything Harry mused. I mean he's got an oversized hoodie on and he looks amazing. All softness and jawline, fuck I want him wearing my clothes, I want him drowning in them thought Harry.

"Harry are you alright?" Zayn looked at Harry puzzled. "You're just kinda staring mate, have I got something on me?"

Harry could feel his face heating up. "God sorry, I just...erm..doesn't matter." Harry could still feel Misty rubbing up against his leg so he bent down and picked her up and she nuzzled into his neck. "Hello there gorgeous, aren't you lovely and friendly."

"Huh, that's weird. Misty usually hates the world, I'm pretty much the only one she lets touch her." I'm fucked Z thought, even Misty likes him.. 

"I've always been good with cats and dogs and animals and just people in general, it's part of the me not being a cunt thing." Harry smiled cheekily at Zayn.

"I don't really think you're a cunt Harry, I just...I was...erm...look Harry do you want to sit down a minute?" Please take the chair, don't sit on the bed, don't sit on the bed, don't sit on the bed....Harry sat on the end of the bed with Misty still happily nestled in his arms. Zayn tried to ignore the feeling that Harry sitting on his bed was giving him and instead held his arms out for Misty who simply gave him a withering look that only cats seem to know how to do. Zayn watched as Misty nudged Harry's hand for him to pet her which he duly did as Misty purred loudly in his arms. "Traitor Misty.”

"Misty can't help it if she has good taste. She must know I give good hugs." Harry winked at Zayn.

Zayn felt his stomach flip flop, well this wasn't doing his just be friends ethos any good. "Erm so not that it's not good to see you Harry, but can I ask why you stumbled through my door? I assume it's not just because you're high."

"Zayn.....I'm not high honest. I have slight asthma and smoking hurts my chest. I usually only shotgun, it doesn't hurt as much, but I didn't even do that. They have been smoking a shit ton of weed so I may have inhaled some, but I'm not high, well not intentionally high."

“Sure?"

"Maybe a bit tipsy. You know tick tock don't stop etc like Kesha said." 

Zayn couldn't help his fond gaze as he stared at Harry. "Why didn't you shotgun? Niall usually loves that."

"I didn't want to shotgun with Niall. The person I wanted to shotgun with wasn't there." Harry couldn't look at Zayn anymore so he continued petting Misty.

"Oh right, like is it someone back at home?" Please say it is, please say it is, please say you have an old boyfriend who you miss dreadfully, who you used to smoke up with all the time, please don't say me, please.

"No Zayn it's not anyone back at home." Harry stared intently at Zayn whilst Zayn's gaze remained firmly on his bed his fingers picking at the tassels on his hoodie.

"I just wanted to apologise for earlier, you know in the hallway. I shouldn't have done that, I crossed a line, we don't even really know each other and erm....yeah I'm sorry. If we could just forget about it and pretend like it didn't happen that would be great." Zayn muttered as he still couldn't bring himself to look at Harry. 

"What if I don't want to forget about it?"

"No yeah of course, fuck sorry you have every right to not want to forget it I shouldn't have asked you that, I'll just...erm I'll stay out of your way for a bit and I'll only come and see Niall when you're out so you don't feel uncomfortable." Zayn flinched as he felt Harry's hand rest on his.

"Hey look at me." Harry said softly.

"I can't." Zayn whispered.

"Why not? I don't bite, well not unless you ask nicely." Harry joked as he saw what he hoped was a hint of a small smile on Zayn's face.

"I'm embarrassed Harry, well mortified would be a better word actually."

"Look at me Zayn......please." 

Zayn took a deep breath and lifted his head up to see a very smiley Harry Styles sitting in front of him. 

"Ok listen to what I'm going to say. I don't mind you tried to kiss me, I mind you pulled away from me, I mind that a lot, but the kiss....that I have no problem with....and like...erm if you ever, you know....erm want to try that again, then I would be up for that....if you wanted to...like no pressure...I mean you're you and I'm me so if you don't that's fine too." Smooth Styles, very smooth. Now it was Harry who couldn't look at Zayn.

"You're not cross with me?"

"God far from it." Harry said. "About what I said, do you think you might want to do that again, maybe?" Harry could feel himself blushing, his face felt like it was on fire but he raised his head and looked straight at Zayn. 

"The thing is Harry…."

Just like that Harry felt his shoulders slump. "Right yeah course, don't worry about it, was just a suggestion we can forget it. I should probably get back to the boys, Niall wants to play FIFA." Harry stood up still cradling Misty in his arms. "Oops better leave you with Misty, just in case she needs a chat." Harry picked up one of Misty's paws and began waving it to say goodbye before gently placing Misty back on the bed. "Bye Misty, lovely to meet you. Look after Zayn for me.”

Harry was killing Zayn, seriously how was he supposed to cope with this. Before Harry could walk away Zayn gently grabbed his wrist. "Wait, please don't go let me explain first." He tugged Harry back so he was once again sitting on the bed. He was barely there for ten seconds before Misty climbed into his lap. Lucky Misty. Zayn held onto Harry's hand "I'd have to be an idiot not to want to kiss you again and kiss you properly. But....Harry look it's your first night here, you're Niall's roommate, and I think all the boys have high hopes that you are going to become one of our friends and I don't want to ruin that. I have a habit of messing things up and if we kissed...." 

All of a sudden the situation from earlier was reversed and it was now Harry's lips gently brushing Zayn's before he reluctantly pulled away. "Harry" Zayn laughed, "Did you not listen to anything I said?”

"Course, I just ignored it." Harry smirked at Zayn. "Look I get your concerns and they're valid. We've only just met etc and I agree, so I was thinking that maybe we could keep this as a casual thing. No strings, just fun, no one gets hurt because we aren't invested in it. Maybe a bit like what Louis and Liam have?" Harry asked hopefully. Zayn sighed and Harry's hopes sank. "Ok before you say no, let me….."

"Harry I'm just going to stop you now. I don't have a problem with casual relationships as such, and what Louis and Liam have works brilliantly for them, but they don't work for me. I'm always the one who gets into deep and always the one who gets hurt in the end and I can't do that anymore. As much as I would really like to keep on kissing you I can't, because I don't do casual and also I'd really like to keep you as a friend Harry. Is that ok? Me saying no does that mean we can't be friends?" Now it was Zayn's turn to look hopefully at Harry. "I mean we can still hang out together and I figure we'd be seeing a lot of each other because we're pretty much with Niall all the time, but there just wouldn't be any kissing.”

"No kissing at all, not even New Year's?" Harry cheekily asked.

"How about if you're not with anyone then we get one mistletoe kiss at Christmas and one at New Year. Deal?”

"What if you're with someone though?"

"I won't be......" I'd rather be with you. "Deal then?”

"Sealed with a kiss?" Harry chanced his luck as Zayn shook his head fondly at him. Harry was going to be the death of him.

"A hug for now. Think you can control yourself Styles?"

"Hey you kissed me first Malik. Come on bring it in let's hug it out." Harry stood up and grabbed Zayn's hand before pulling him up off the bed. "I should warn you that I am the best at hugs. You haven't experienced a proper hug until you've been hugged by me."

"Big words Harry."

"I'm a big boy Zayn." Harry waggled his eyebrows at Zayn before winking. Zayn felt his stomach lurch. 

"You're filthy you know that right."

"Oh Zayn you have no idea." Harry pulled Zayn towards him and wrapped his arms around him.

"You smell of weed.” Zayn said.

"You smell of cat.” Harry replied.

"Fuck off. I do not. If anything you smell of cat after Misty was whoring herself all over you." Zayn resisted the urge to snuggle closer to Harry, but it was really hard.

"Ooh jealous of a cat are we. Wish it was you leaving your scent all over me?" Harry's voice had suddenly dropped very low and his mouth was now awfully close to Zayn's ear. 

"You wish." Zayn managed to choke out as Harry pulled Zayn's body even closer to his.

"I really do Zayn." Harry dipped his head down and began slowly leaving open mouthed kisses on Zayn's neck. He heard Zayn's breath catch in his throat as he continued ravaging his neck. Harry's heart was beating fast and their bodies were pressed so close together he was sure Zayn could feel it. 

"Harry....we have to....fuck....just ok...shit...." Zayn was struggling as Harry's lips continued their relentless assault on his neck. It was only when his cock began to twitch and an embarrassing whine emerged from his mouth that Zayn knew he had to pull back before he did something that he would regret, despite how much he was enjoying it. Zayn gently eased himself out of Harry's embrace."I''m sorry Harry we have to stop now otherwise I won't be able to." 

"Are you sure?" Harry whined.

No thought Zayn, I would like nothing more than to lock my door and spend the night with you. "Yes babe I'm sure."

Harry tried not to let his heart flutter at Zayn calling him babe, he'd heard Zayn call Louis that earlier but it still sent a little thrill through him when the word left Zayn's mouth."Ok fine." Harry pouted. 

"Fuck Harry, your lips are just....." They were bright red and swollen from where Harry had been kissing Zayn's neck. He looked up and could see that Harry's pupils were dilated and his skin was flushed, Zayn wondered if his reflection in the mirror would show the same. "Ok, so friends yes. We're doing that." He could see the disappointment in Harry's eyes and he felt his own disappointment just as strong. "How about in the spirit of new friendship I come join you and the boys for a game of FIFA?" Zayn couldn't help smiling as Harry's eyes lit up. Shit he really was quite extraordinary. 

"Yes, yes, yes!!" Harry was unable to hide his excitement and Zayn just laughed.

"Alright calm down, they'll think I'm fucking you in here." Zayn joked.

Harry drew Zayn closer again and whispered in his ear. "Oh I'm much louder than that love." Harry smiled at the goosebumps breaking out on Zayn's arms.

"You're going to klll me Harry. You honestly are."

"A bit of flirting never hurt anyone.You don't mind flirting do you Zayn?" Harry said fluttering his eyelashes at Zayn.

"Louis is the biggest flirt ever, he taught me all I know so prepare for some hardcore flirting babe. You don't mind me calling you babe do you Harry?" Zayn said before fluttering his eyelashes back at Harry.

"Bring it on love." Harry winked before grabbing Zayn's hand and pulling him out of the door.


	8. Chapter 8

The first term at Oxford flew by for Harry, fresher's week was a blur of parties and societies, and yet more parties. Despite Harry's initial misgivings about what the student body would be like, everyone had been pretty friendly so far. He suspected that was partly down to the fact that everyone loved Niall. It was just like Zayn said, everyone knew Niall and as he was Niall's roommate that helped ease him in to the social side of University life.

Harry didn't really see Zayn much that first week, it was as if he was giving Harry space to find his feet without interfering. They texted each other though. A lot. Harry more so than Zayn, random shit and pictures of things he considered interesting or that he thought would make Zayn laugh. Not seeing Zayn for a whole week had helped Harry in that it calmed down the ridiculous attraction he felt for him. 

After the initial rush of freshers week came the first week proper with lectures and seminars and Harry getting to know his new classmates. He'd had a few sideways glances from people on his course when they inevitably found out he was on a scholarship, but in all honestly they seemed like twats anyway so he wasn't too fussed. 

Harry had also found himself two part-time jobs within the first month to help supplement his scholarship. He was now working Saturdays at a small independent bakery in the centre of Oxford. His previous experience had earned him the job, and his dimples and curls also helped sway the manager. Niall had also hooked him up with a job at a local bar where he now pulled pints Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. Working so much meant he had to maximise his studies during the day so Elizabeth the Librarian was his new best friend. Harry had somehow managed to charm Lizzie into saving him his favourite table every day, the homemade muffin from the bakery also working its charm. 

This was now Harry's life, class, study, work, sleep. It gave him little chance to socialise, but he always tried to spend Saturday nights with either his new friends from class or Niall and the boys, which also included Zayn. He tried not to monopolise all of Zayn's time on their nights out because he knew Zayn just wanted to be friends and Harry was respecting that, however, difficult he found that to be. Harry was still holding out for his mistletoe kiss though, it wasn't long until Christmas and as of yet Harry hadn't met anyone else. Well that was until the end of November arrived.

 

****************

 

It was a standard night at the pub, Harry had come straight from the bakery because he'd worked late. Zayn thought he smelt delicious so he'd situated himself at the other end of the table as far away from Harry as he possibly could. The evening was going well, conversation bubbling along nicely, Zayn and Harry both giving each other heated glances when they thought the other wasn't looking. Niall being loud and bright and Louis being loud and sarcastic whilst Liam tried to rein him in. Nothing different, until the idea of Secret Santa got floated, then things started going downhill rapidly. 

Harry forgot sometimes just how well off the other boys were. They didn't make him feel any less than them because he was on a scholarship and had to work. In fact they were more than happy to help out with feeding Harry either before or after the nights he worked at the pub because they knew he didn't have time to do it himself. Harry wasn't even sure how they got on to the subject of Secret Santa considering there was still another month to go until Christmas. 

"I'm assuming everyone is in for Secret Santa again this year." Louis said excitedly.

"Yes Lou." three other voices said in perfect harmony. 

"Try not to sound too excited boys, Harry can I count you in?" 

"Yeah sure, is it standard Secret Santa or do you have different rules?" Harry asked.

"Just the standard version, we all pick a name out of a hat, you buy that person a present for a set amount and then we all get together the week before we head home for Christmas and open them together." Louis said.

"You don't wait and open them on Christmas Day?" Harry asked.

"Not since Louis thought it would be hilarious to get Niall a massive dildo as his Secret Santa when the three of us were fifteen. Niall had no idea what it was and he opened it on Christmas Day in front of his whole family. How Louis and I wished we'd been there." Zayn laughed. 

"I've never seen my Mum blush so much in my life." Niall said, shaking his head at the memory.

"Last year we did it in halls and this year we thought we'd do it on a Sunday at ours. Niall is going to cook a roast and there will be decorations and everything."

"Decorations like mistletoe?" Harry smirked.

"I'm sure that's already top of Zayn's list." Louis said before unsubtly elbowing Zayn.

"Fuck off Louis." Zayn said.

"Yeah yeah, so Harry are you in for Secret Santa?"

"Definitely. I love everything about Christmas."

"Great, so we have a set gift price of £100, but you're allowed to go a tenner over if you see something that you really like for someone. Is that alright?" Louis smiled at Harry. He knew Harry was working now so he was confident that Harry would be able to join in.

"Erm.....well." This is when Harry remembered how different his life was to the other boys. He could barely afford to spend that on presents for his family, let alone one of the boys. He wasn't embarrassed that he didn't have money he was frustrated that other people had the ability not to worry about what they spent their money on. Harry had done secret santa with some of his mates at college and even a little one in the bakery in Holmes Chapel, but the most they ever spent was a tenner. "Actually Louis that's probably a bit much for me but thanks for the thought."

"Come on Harry, you've got your scholarship and your two little jobs." Louis really didn't mean to sound patronising but Harry could feel his anger building up within. "We don't want you to miss out so how about it?"

Harry wondered if this was an indication of what the rest of the year was going to be like, he really hoped not because he liked the boys, but he wasn't going to be talked into spending money that he didn't have. "I'm going to have decline, but like I said before thanks for asking me. Speaking of jobs I probably reek of the bakery, so I'm going to get off home. I need to study tomorrow so I don't want to get too wasted, and I need to wash the smell of cake and bread off me. Enjoy the rest of your night boys and I'll catch up with you all later. Niall see you at home." Harry slid out of their usual booth and hurried towards the door not looking back to see if anyone was coming after him.

"Well that was awkward. Ouch Zayn, what was that for?" Louis rubbed his arm where Z had punched him. 

"Fucks sake Louis, what on earth made you think Harry could afford £100 on secret santa."

"I wasn't trying to be rude Zayn, I just didn't want him to feel left out. If it's that big a deal we'll lower the amount we spend." Louis sulked.

"I'll go after him and make sure he's alright." Zayn said as he was halfway out of his seat. "Get me another beer Louis please." Zayn headed out of the door to find Harry in the alleyway checking something on his phone. 

"Harry, are you alright? What are you doing down the alley?" 

"Checking bus times. You didn't have to come out after me, I can look after myself."

"I know, I just.....sometimes Lou speaks without thinking like back in the pub so I'm sorry."

"Don't matter, it's not a problem." Liar Harry thought to himself. 

"Ok great, because I had a solution to what Louis was suggesting and like none of us want you miss out so I thought I could lend you the £100 for secret santa and then you still get to join us, and we don't have to tell anyone." Zayn said quickly.

"Right because the scholarship kid can't afford it. No thanks Zayn I don't want your charity." Harry said, the annoyance clearly audible in his voice.

"What, no it's not like that." Zayn said horrified at the thought he might have offended Harry. "It's not charity Harry. I just want to help you."

"Like I said before it's not for me and I've got to go because my bus leaves in ten minutes. See you around, I'll text you tomorrow."

"Harry, we're alright though right? You're not cross at me are you, because I didn't mean to cause any offence. " Zayn said worriedly. 

"It's all good I'm just tired. Nothing a good night sleep won't help. Night Zayn." Harry said wearily.

"Night Harry." Zayn said forlornly as he watched Harry trudge off to catch his bus. "Fuck." Zayn knew Harry was upset with him, he should never have offered the money, but he wanted Harry to spend secret santa day with him and the boys. It might be the last time they were together before they all went their separate ways for Christmas and now Zayn felt like he'd ruined it.

Harry tried not to stomp off when he left Zayn because he didn't want him to know how annoyed he was with him. "Poor little Harry, can't afford to join in with secret santa because I'm not all fancy and rich. Here have some money because I've got so much I don't need it all myself." Harry mumbled to himself as he walked towards the bus stop. "I guess that lasted longer than I thought it would before someone felt sorry for the scholarship boy and offered him an handout. God. I should probably stop talking to myself in the street as well."

"I was quite enjoying it actually." A voice said from behind.

"Fuck me." Harry shouted in surprise. 

"I didn't realise we were quite at that stage of our relationship yet Harry." said the tall dark haired man in front of him.

"Oh my god Joe, you scared the crap out of me." 

"Clearly. Is everything alright?" Joe said with a look of concern in his eyes.

"I've had better nights."

"Me too mate, I'm heading back to mine with a bottle of vodka to drown my study sorrows if you want to join me?"

Harry looked at Joe and thought yeah why the fuck not. "I'm in."

"Brilliant, I'm literally just across the road." 

"Lead the way good sir." Harry followed Joe as they crossed the road to his flat. "You did well, getting a place so close to the centre of town."

"One the professors rents out flats to his research fellows at a cheaper rate so I was lucky really." Joe said as he unlocked the front door. "Come in, it's pretty small but....."

"Joe, I live in a shared room in halls and as I much love Niall this is a luxury believe me." Harry laughed. 

"This is the grand tour which will last less than a minute. To your right we have the bathroom and my bedroom, to the left we have the lounge and small kitchen. Nothing special, but it's home. Follow me and I'll crack the vodka open and we can swap our woes with each other."

Harry walked into the front room and sat on the sofa leaving Joe to grab glasses and ice from the kitchen. Harry had met Joe the first night he started working in the pub. Joe was a regular, he had a small table in the corner where he sat and did his work. Harry had asked him once why he didn't use the library and Joe said he liked the hustle and bustle of the pub and it helped keep him alert for his research. Everyone in the pub knew Joe and they gave him his space and allowed him to work. He was six years older than Harry and was in the process of completing his doctorate. Oh and he was fit, Harry wasn't immune to that fact. Harry had nearly spilt his drink on him the first time he served him, he had black hair, blue eyes, and an East London accent that had sounded so out of place in Oxford that Harry wondered if he was lost. 

"There you go mate." Joe said as he handed the glass of vodka and coke over to Harry. "So what was all that about before then or do you often walk around the streets of Oxford talking to yourself?" Joe laughed.

"Funny. I do have a habit of talking to myself, but usually when I'm in my room not when I'm walking down the street."

"What changed today then?"

"I'm sure you know Niall, because he knows everyone, but do you know Louis, Liam and Zayn as well?" Harry asked.

"It's hard not to know Niall and I've seen the others with him. They seem like a good group of lads."

Harry sighed. "Yeah they are."

"So what's the problem?" Joe asked.

"What do you know about me?" Harry said.

"I know you work behind the bar at the Hope. I know you share a room with Niall and that you're friends with the other boys because I've seen you around town. I know you have insanely curly hair, cute dimples when you smile and if I'm being blunt you're incredibly hot, but that's about it." Joe smiled at Harry who had gone a lovely shade of red.

"You're think I'm hot?" Harry asked quietly.

"Seriously Harry, I think everyone who goes in the pub thinks you're hot and half of them probably have a crush on you. But, we'll leave your hotness levels for later. Tell me what I don't know about you."

"Erm....yeah ok." Harry was still a bit flustered by Joe thinking he was hot. Joe was a research fellow, he had his shit together and he was the hot one, not Zayn level hotness obviously, but still hot. "So I'm not like a lot of the others at Oxford and I'm definitely not like Niall, Zayn, Louis and Liam."

"Oooh do you have a skeleton in your closet Harry?" Joe quizzed him. "Are you a fugitive from the law, are you really a member of the royal family, how about....."

"I'm on a scholarship." Harry said waiting for the inevitable.

"That's it? That's your big secret. Harry there is nothing shameful about being on a scholarship, please don't tell me you think there is?" Joe looked at Harry with concern in his eyes.

"Not shameful exactly." Harry murmured.

"Good, because I was on a scholarship and I felt nothing shameful at all about being awarded it. I worked my fucking arse off for it and I deserved it." Joe said with absolute conviction in his voice.

"You were on a scholarship?" Harry asked.

"Seriously Harry, how many accents have you heard around here like mine. Did it not even cross your mind?"

"I don't like it when people make assumptions, so not really." Harry shrugged.

"Fair enough. Are Niall and the others bothering you about being on a scholarship, because that's out of order."

"No no they're really not. Maybe it's just me being a bit precious about it."

"Do you need me to sort them out for you." Joe dropped the tone of his voice and went full on gangster mode before laughing and winking at Harry.

"Dick. Ok so we were at the pub today and somehow the subject got round to secret santa and Louis asked me if I wanted to join in and of course I said yes because Christmas is amazing."

"Fact." Joe smiled.

"Right, so the boys explained how they had a dinner at their house and they all exchange gifts and I thought it sounded great so I was in. Then Louis mentioned the price limit."

"Too rich for your blood?"

"Yeah, just a bit. Like in my head I thought maybe £20 which I could manage what with working two jobs. I mean   
back home me and my mates used to do it for £5 and see who could get the best present with it. I thought £20 would be a piece of piss." Harry said bluntly.

"Now I know how much you hate it when people make assumptions Harry, but I'm going to go out on a limb and assume it was a bit more than £20?"

"Yeah just a bit, Louis casually mentioned it was going to be £100."

"Ah rich boys you gotta love their absolute lack of awareness."

"I don't want you to get the wrong impression of them though, because they're really great." Harry said hastily.

"Just a bit thoughtless yeah?" Joe mused.

"Maybe, and I don't think it was done with malice or to make me feel small you know, but it just made me realise that I'm not the same as them."

"When I first arrived in Oxford I had no clue what I was doing, not one. I had an absolute cunt of a roommate so I spent most of my time studying in the library or going out with friends I made on my course. It was hard being on a scholarship, because a lot of the time going out with friends meant me not drinking because I couldn't afford it and hey there is nothing wrong with not drinking but sometimes being the only one not drinking gets pretty tiresome. Second year I moved into a house with people I actually liked and I've not looked back since then. I got a job, I studied hard, played harder, too hard at times. I met a bloke, got my heart broken, met another bloke, had the best sex of my life so far, got some proper crap tattoos and had the best time ever. I did all that on a scholarship Harry. I did all that with friends who were richer than me, who had more money than I will ever see in my lifetime, but who I love fiercely. Yes at times it was hard, having to miss out on stuff because I couldn't afford it, or missing out because I was too proud to ask for help." Joe smiled at the knowing look in Harry's eyes. "Experienced that already?"

"Earlier when you heard me talking to myself.....so after the whole secret santa thing and me turning them down I kinda just wanted to be myself for a bit so I left the pub and Zayn followed me."

"Zayn is the ridiculously beautiful one right?" 

"Yeah that's him." Harry sighed. "He's also ridiculously lovely and kind too."

"What a cunt." Joe said, the sarcasm dripping from his voice.

Harry burst out laughing. "He'd like you." Although after Harry said that he didn't know if that was true. It was obvious to Harry that Joe liked him, and Harry did not think Zayn would like that at all. "Zayn came after me and apologised for Louis and said he didn't mean anything by it, and he offered to give me the £100 so I could still take part in Secret Santa."

"Let me guess, you snapped and said something about not taking charity from anyone. Am I right?" Joe said smugly.

"I was still a little annoyed about the whole secret santa thing and I may have mentioned the word charity before subtly stropping off a bit."

"Do you regret that?"

Harry sighed again. "Yeah a bit, because he was only trying to be nice. I guess I'll talk to him tomorrow and explain everything."

"For now how about another drink?" Joe got up and was already halfway to the kitchen before saying yes. 

"So why were you in a bad mood?"

"Ugh research politics and funding. Boring arse shit."

"Ooh is it like the stuff you see on Lewis before someone gets murdered?" Harry giggled.

Joe finished pouring their drinks and made his way back to the sofa. "One you sound way too excited about the chances of someone getting murdered, and two why the fuck are you watching Lewis?"

"Well Joe....one who doesn't enjoy a bit of murder and two don't disrespect Lewis it is amazing."

"Aren't you the interesting one. Tell me more about yourself Harry."

Harry and Joe spent the next two hours chatting shit about everything and anything, from life back in their respective home towns or village in Harry's case, to the music they liked, to films and books and what it was like being on a scholarship. They also played multiple rounds of fuck, marry and avoid. After numerous vodkas Harry discovering Joe would fuck Hathaway from Lewis made his absolute night. "I thought you didn't watch Lewis."

"I never said that Harry, you assumed." Joe winked.

"Yeah yeah whatever." Harry caught a glimpse of Joe's clock and realised it was now 3.30am. "I better head off now, otherwise my head is going to be mashed tomorrow."

"Are you sure? You're welcome to sleep on the sofa."

"Cheers Joe, but my back would be fucked. I'll get the night bus, but thanks for the offer." Harry eased himself off the sofa avoiding any sudden moves after the vodka they had gone through. "I really appreciate you listening to my endless shit talk tonight."

Joe smiled. "Hey you listened to all mine too, so it was only fair. I enjoyed it Harry."

"Me too." Much to Harry's surprise he did. Harry made his way to the front door of Joe's flat. "I guess I'll see you on Tuesday at the Hope?"

"Yeah I'll be there at my table working on my fucking research proposal."

"Wait your research proposal is about fucking?" Harry joked.

"Hilarious Harry, fucking hilarious." Joe said fondly. 

"I try. Maybe I can buy you a drink as a thank you for tonight?"

"Actually I was going to ask if I could buy you a drink."

"Joe I work in a pub, the least I can do is buy you a drink."

"No you dick, I didn't mean at the Hope. I meant could I take you out for a drink?"

"Like a date?"

"No Harry not like a date, an actual date." Joe said.

"Oh...erm..." Harry wasn't sure what to say, he could feel himself blushing.

"Fuck. I'm so sorry. I've made you uncomfortable and that was never my intention. We can forget it, and you can just buy me a drink next time at the Hope." Joe said, quickly backtracking.

"Joe I'm not uncomfortable, I'm just surprised." Harry was, because Joe was older and he was sorted and together and Harry was not. "I'd like that, I really would.' Fuck it. He was going for it, because a much as he liked Zayn they were only ever going to be friends and Joe was lovely and fit, did Harry mention he was fit.

"Great, how about next Saturday then? I'll pick you up at eight."

"Sounds perfect. I look forward to it." 

Joe gently pulled Harry towards him and into his arms. "Me too Harry." He let Harry go and Harry opened the front door. 

"Thanks again Joe for tonight. I'll catch up with you soon. Oh I should probably have your number."

"Not thinking of ways to back out already are you?"

"Not a chance." Harry took out his phone and realised his battery had run out. "Crap, my battery is gone. I'll just give you my number instead and then you can text me." Joe handed Harry his phone and Harry tapped in his number. "There you go, text me." 

"Will do, see you soon Harry."

Harry opened the front door and walked down the steps before turning and waving bye to Joe. "See ya." He left Joe's and made his way across the road to the night bus. Not such a bad night after all.


	9. Chapter 9

Harry's date with Joe. It wasn't that he was keeping it a secret as such....fuck he was. He hadn't told anyone. When Niall asked if he'd wanted to meet all the boys for a drink on Saturday he'd made his excuses and said that he was already meeting some of his class mates. He'd then received multiple texts from the others making sure he wasn't still angry at them for the whole secret Santa debacle. After numerous text reassurances he'd agreed to go for a drink with them on Wednesday as he'd swapped his shift at the pub with Alison who usually worked on a Monday. Wednesday had come and gone and it had been great. No one said anything about secret Santa and Zayn had even sat next to him for the whole night although the unspoken apology he could see in Zayn's eyes for the whole evening was almost too much for him. "Zayn stop it."

"Stop what, I'm not doing anything". Zayn said.

"Stop apologising."

"I never even said anything."

"You've been giving me apology eyes all night. You don't have to we're all good."

"Are you sure?" Zayn said as his hand gently brushed against Harry's. 

"Promise Zayn, so you can relax now." Harry said in a reassuring voice.

"I was worried you know, that I'd offended you the other night and like I didn't want you to be cross with me."

"Hey I couldn't ever be cross at you. Just erm I know you were trying to help with the money thing but I would never take advantage of your friendship like that. You mean too much to me to do that."

"Harry it wouldn't be taking advantage of me if I'm the one offering in the first place."

"But....."

"No wait please let me. Look I don't know what it's like to be on a scholarship and I can't imagine, and I never meant it to come across like I was treating you as a charity case. I just....fuck...I wanted you to spend secret Santa day with us, and I thought that was a way for you to do it. only I realise now that you can still spend it with us, you just don't have to take part in it. Will you?? Will you spend the day with us, with me??" Zayn said, with hope in his voice.

Fuck Zayn was killing him. He could already feel the underlying twinge of guilt that he was going out on an date with Joe on Saturday. "I couldn't think of anywhere else I'd rather be." Harry said as he gently squeezed Zayn's hand. 

 

****************

Zayn was trying to study but all he could hear was the rhythmic banging of Louis' headboard as Liam fucked Louis into the mattress. "For fucks sake it's a Saturday afternoon." Zayn picked up his phone and called Niall's number. "Niall are you home today?" 

"No mate. I didn't make it home last night if you know what I mean, I'm spending the rest of the day and hopefully night with Tara."

Great so everyone was getting some except him. Zayn ignored the little voice in his head telling him that he could be getting some with Harry right now. "Any chance I can use your room today to study. I know Harry is working so it'll be empty."

"Sure no problems. I take it the double L's are going at it?"

"Like you wouldn't fucking believe. They've got no shame." 

"You're just jealous mate." Niall laughed. "Use the spare key I gave you and let yourself in. I'll text Harry and let him know you're going to be there."

"Cheers babe you're the best."

"I know, see you tomorrow I got to go take care of Tara and by take care I mean...."

"Bye Niall." Zayn hung up, he didn't need to hear a detailed description of what Niall and Tara were going to get up to. He grabbed his rucksack and books and made sure Misty had enough food to last the evening, he then headed out the door with the sounds of Louis moaning ringing in his ears. 

 

****************

Harry was knackered already and it was only three o'clock. Joe had text him to say he was pushing their date back an hour to eight thirty which was fine by Harry. Sadie was letting him leave now which meant he could go home, have a nap, and be wide awake for tonight. Joe was picking him up from halls and then they were heading out for a drink. Harry still hadn't told anyone and he felt kinda bad about it. He figured he'd see how it went, and then if there was going to be a second one he'd tell Niall first as his roommate and then Zayn because well he was Zayn. "I'll see you next Saturday Sadie, thanks for letting me skip out early."

"No problem darling you look like you need a rest."

"You're the best Sade." Harry said as he wrapped her up in a big hug. 

"Always a charmer Styles now go on with you."

Harry blew Sadie a kiss and made the short walk back to halls. All Harry wanted was his bed. He wanted to burrow down into the bed with his quilt wrapped around him and fall asleep. If he napped till six that still gave him a good few hours to wake up, have a snack, and get ready before Joe came to pick him up. He was looking forward to seeing Joe again properly, they'd seen each other briefly when Harry had been working at the pub, but Harry never liked to bother him too much when Joe was working on his research. 

Harry felt Joe could understand his Oxford experience in a way that the other boys couldn't because he'd lived it. Even if nothing further developed with Joe, Harry was hoping they could at least be friends. Although Harry's stomach did squirm with a mixture of excitement and guilt at something more happening with Joe than just being friends. Harry could appreciate a fit bloke as much as the next person and Joe was certainly that. 

The truth was that Harry hadn't been with anyone but his own hand for at least six months and he missed the intimacy of being with another person. Not just for the obvious reason, but also simple things like waking up beside someone or holding their hand. In his head he still couldn't imagine doing those things with Joe, it was always Zayn, but maybe after a few dates it would be Joe who occupied his dreams.

Harry finally reached his room and unlocked the door, Niall had stayed out last night with Tara so he wasn't expecting him home yet so he could just relax. He opened the door and eyed his bed longingly not noticing the books scattered on Niall's bed or Zayn's rucksack on the floor. Harry immediately toed his boots off before pulling his tshirt over his head and throwing it on the floor swiftly followed by his skinny jeans, well as swiftly as you can when you're wearing skinny jeans. He untied his hair from the bun on top of his head before running his hands through to it to get any knots out, sighing gently before taking his boxers off. He was going to take advantage of the fact Niall wasn't home and let it all hang out. Harry didn't hear the bathroom door open or see Zayn standing there until he stood back up from picking his clothes off the floor. Harry screamed, he would deny it was a scream but it was a proper full on crap your pants scream.

"Fuck. Oh Fuck Harry. Shit, sorry." Zayn squeaked before turning around and going straight back into the bathroom. The image of Harry naked was now indelibly burned into Zayn's memory. "Just friends, just friends, just friends." If Zayn said it enough times he could almost convince himself it was true. Why did Harry have to not only be this incredible person, but hot too, just fuck me hot, with a cock which made Zayn's mouth water. "How am I supposed to look at him again knowing he's hiding that underneath. I'm fucked, I'm more fucked than I was this morning. " Zayn leant his head against the bathroom door and wished he had the power to time travel so none of this happened. If he could just rewind time so he was coming out of the bathroom before Harry was naked. "Fuck!" Zayn jumped as Harry knocked gently on the door.

"Zayn? Are you alright in there?" Harry enquired. He'd heard Zayn mumbling to himself in the bathroom and was concerned. 

"I'm fine, sorry I'll be out in a minute. Are you dressed now?" Please say yes Zayn muttered under his breath.

"Yes I'm dressed Zayn." Harry chuckled. If Harry tried to keep the situation as lighthearted as possible it would stop him from freaking the fuck out at the fact that Zayn now knew what his cock looked like. Harry went and sat down on his bed and tried to remain calm. Everything was fine, so what Zayn had seen him naked, he'd seen Zayn in just his pants before with his amazing tattoos and beautiful skin. Fuck get that image out of your head Harry thought. Think of horrible things, think about the fact that you're going on a date with Joe tonight and you should be thinking about that and not what Zayn's skin would taste like if you licked it. Harry knew he was fucked. Harry looked up as he heard the door creak open. Great why didn't the door creak earlier when I was naked.

"Harry. Seriously I thought you were dressed." Zayn sighed.

Harry looked down at himself. "I am."

"You've got no top on, like your tattoos, it's a lot."

"I've not got as many as you though." Harry smiled gesturing towards Zayn's arms.

"That's not what I meant Harry, I meant it's like a lot to look at. You know all your skin and stuff. Could you maybe just put a tshirt on?" Z ayn said quietly.

"I didn't realise you were so into skin Zayn, I'm going to have to watch myself around you. Rest easy I'll put a tshirt on. Wouldn't want you to ravage me......or would I?" Harry joked.

"Idiot." Zayn smiled.

Harry picked up a white tshirt and put it on. "Better?"

Not really considering it was pretty thin and you could still see the black outlines of Harry's tattoos through it. "Yep all   
good. I'm sorry about before, with the whole seeing you naked thing. I thought you were working all day and Niall said it was fine for me to study here. Louis and Liam are spending the whole day fucking each other and they're so loud I couldn't concentrate, and I just needed some peace to do my work and I can go somewhere else, I can probably go to the library it'll be quiet there, it's just I like a bed to study in but I'll be fine, it's good." Zayn started as Harry grabbed his wrist. 

"Hey Zayn, breathe, yeah."

"Sorry, I just, I feel embarrassed and so I get a bit wordy and rambling and well like this, and over explain."

"Zayn stop. You have nothing to be embarrassed about at all. It's not a big deal."

"Looked like a pretty big deal to me." Zayn couldn't help smirking.

"Oi cheeky."

"Sorry it's just it was there and like it's big Harry, you know that right."

Harry put his head in his hands. "Can we please stop talking about my cock." Harry felt the bed dip as Zayn sat beside him.

"Sorry babe, I'm embarrassing you now. I'll rid the image from my head." Liar. Zayn wouldn't be getting that image out of his head for weeks.

"Thank you."

"So Niall said he was going to let you know I was here? I'm assuming that didn't happen, unless your nakedness was a cunning ploy to seduce me." Zayn winked at Harry and laughed.

"I don't need to resort to my naked body to seduce you love, I thought you would have realised that by now." Harry's voice had dropped even lower than usual and the air around them felt charged. Zayn swallowed loudly and decided to remove himself from the situation. 

"I should probably leave you to it and study somewhere else, you can get some peace and quiet whilst Niall is not here." Zayn joked.

"Don't go, you're more than welcome to stay here and study, I was just going to have a nap anyway. I can do that while you study."

"Are you sure? I wouldn't want to disturb you, it is your room after all."

"Honest Zayn, I don't mind I'm so tired I'll be dead to the world in ten minutes. Just make sure I'm up by about six o'clock if that's alright?"

"No worries. That's a long nap Harry, bad day at the bakery or got a big date lined up and need your rest." Zayn laughed until he saw the nervous look on Harry's face. "Oh." Zayn tried not to let the disappointment show on his face or in his voice but he wasn't sure how good a job he did by the look on Harry's face. "Right, yeah course, like I can go now and give you some space. I'm sure you don't want me hanging about."

"Please stay Zayn, please. Look...fuck..I didn't want you to find out this way...I was going to tell you."

"Harry it's honestly fine, you're not beholden to me, you don't have to tell me everything." As much as i'd like you too thought Zayn.

"No I know, I just...it's just a drink that's all. I was going to tell you, I just i didn't really know how to say it and then I thought I'd only tell you if like....."

"If like you thought it was going anywhere?"

"Yeah." Harry said quietly. Zayn sat back down next to Harry on the bed. 

"Babe you don't have to apologise to me or explain yourself. Don't feel like you can't talk to me about that stuff. We're friends Harry." How Zayn managed to get the word friend out without choking he did not know, but somehow he managed. "Friends should be able to tell each other anything." Apart from how much you actually like them, how often you think about them, how you miss them when they're not around, how you get a nauseous feeling in your stomach at the thought of them going on a date with someone who isn't you. Anything but that. "So do I know him?" 

"Yeah I think so. It's Joe Teller, he's a research fellow."

Zayn's stomach dropped. Most people knew who Joe Teller was. The boys called him research Joe and he studied in the same pub that Harry worked at. He was also fit, not Harry level of hotness obviously, but there was no mistaking his attractiveness. Joe was older, incredibly intelligent and Zayn knew that when Joe arrived at Oxford he'd been a scholarship kid like Harry, so he would know exactly what Harry was going through and the difficulties in adjusting to an environment like Oxford. He was the polar opposite to Zayn, he was just a boy lucky enough to be born into a rich family, who'd never wanted for anything material in his life, at least that was Zayn's own perception of himself, because it certainly wasn't Harry's. Zayn was pleased for Harry, he'd found the perfect bloke, he deserved to be happy. "Oh yeah I know who he is, does his studying in your pub, quite easy on the eye too." Zayn managed to get out.

Not nearly as beautiful as you thought Harry. "He's alright."

"Details then Harry, how did he ask you out?" Zayn could be a good friend, he could do this, he could be supportive.

"Yeah, he asked if I wanted to go for a drink so I thought why not. I've not got anyone else hammering down my door to ask have I?" Harry looked straight at Zayn who tried not to flinch at Harry's obvious dig.

"I guess not. When did he ask you?"

Harry looked down at the bed again. "The night of Secret Santa, I bumped into him on the way to the bus and I went back to his and we talked for a couple of hours and then he asked me just as I was leaving."

Harry had been to his flat already. Great. "I'm pleased for you Harry, you'll have to let me know how it went."

"Ok. I should probably start that nap now."

"Fuck sorry yeah, I'm keeping you from sleeping. Are you sure you don't mind me studying?"

"Course not."

Zayn got up and moved to Niall's bed. "I'll be quiet I promise." Zayn picked up his text book and highlighter and started reading. 

"Zayn?"

"Yeah?"

"Erm like I usually sleep nakd because it gets really hot in here, are you alright if I strip off to just my boxers?"

"Sure Harry, no worries. It's your room after all." Seriously how am I going to get any work done knowing Harry is in his   
bed practically naked thought Zayn. Harry began taking his tshirt off and before Zayn could torture himself with images of Harry half dressed he looked down intently at his books. 

Harry got into bed and slid his trackies off. "I've set my alarm, but just in case if you could wake me up that would be brilliant, cheers Zayn." 

"Will do mate." Zayn still didn't look up from his books. The next few hours felt like six for Zayn, at one point he was sure that he'd rather be listening to Liam fuck Louis than thinking about Harry in bed across the room from him. Harry wasn't faring much better in his bed. He'd maybe drifted off to sleep for half hour before waking up and then spending the next two hours not moving. All he could think about was his date with Joe, and how unbearably guilty he felt. Finally his alarm went off and Harry breathed a sigh of relief.

"Guess I don't have to wake you up then." Zayn said. He'd also realised about forty five minutes ago that Harry wasn't asleep but Zayn felt too awkward to say anything. 

"I wasn't really sleeping for some of it, but I didn't want to disturb your studying."

"Harry it's your room, you could have just sent me on me way. Too excited to sleep eh?" Zayn forced the words out.

"Something like that." Harry muttered. "I'm probably going to have a shower and get ready for Joe, you can stay here a bit longer if you want??"

Zayn knew he should leave but hey he'd always had the ability to torture himself so he agreed to stay whilst Harry got ready for his date with Joe. "Thanks Harry. I'll stay for a bit, I can help you pick an outfit for your date." Zayn said jokingly not realising Harry would take him up on the offer. 

"Really that would be great." Harry said not wanting Zayn to leave just yet.

Now Zayn was stuck pretending to study while Harry was going to have a shower. As if he needed that mental image on top of everything else, and preparing himself for picking out a date outfit for Harry. Louis was going to rip the absolute piss out of him for this. He'd find it hilarious at first then he'd realise Zayn was sad and he'd go into protective mode and they'd end up cuddling on the sofa watching sad films until Zayn fell asleep.

"Ok, well I won't be too long in the shower."

"I'll just crack on studying then." Zayn looked down at his books so he wouldn't have to see a half naked Harry getting in the shower. 

Harry grabbed a towel and made his way to the bathroom leaving a despondent Zayn laying on Niall's bed. 

Zayn picked up his phone and typed out a quick text to Louis. "Hey I know you're probably still fucking, when I get back later can we please talk. I'll bring the beers, but just me and you Lou if that's alright? Love you." Zayn only ever put 'love you' in a text to Louis when it was something really important. Zayn didn't expect a response for at least an hour. Neither of them would hear their phone whilst they were otherwise occupied. Zayn thought maybe he should just sneak out now and avoid any more date talk from Harry or watch him get ready to go out on a date with someone that wasn't him. He couldn't do it though, he knew Harry would be upset if he did that and he didn't want to ruin Harry's date before it had even begun. Well he did obviously, but he wouldn't because he cared about Harry too much to see him upset. 

Zayn started reading the same page he had been staring at for the last hour, trying to concentrate on his studies rather than thinking about Harry's date, or the fact he was having a shower only metres away from him. He threw his book down in despair and instead starting scrolling through Harry's Instagram. There were so many pictures of Harry with his family, they were very much alike in that way. Zayn missed his sisters desperately sometimes and Zayn knew Harry missed Gemma just as much. His elder sister Doniya and his mum already knew about Harry and both were more than eager to meet him. Maybe if Harry and him were actually in a relationship that might actually happen, but Zayn knew Harry meeting them wouldn't be happening anytime soon. 

"Zayn can you do me a favour please?" Harry shouted from the bathroom.

"Need me to come scrub your back?" Zayn joked. If only he mused.

"Funny. Can you grab the spare towel in the drawers next to my bed for me please."

"Too big for one towel eh Styles."

"The other one is smaller idiot, it's for me to dry my hair with."

"Sure." Zayn crossed the room to Harry's side. "Which drawer?"

"Bottom one cheers."

Zayn bent down opened the drawer and grabbed Harry's towel. "Found it." Zayn stood back up with the towel to find Harry standing in the bathroom doorway with nothing but a towel riding low on his hips with water slowly trickling down his body. Harry slowly ran a hand through his hair and smiled at Zayn holding his hand out for the towel.

"Cheers mate."

This is so unfair Zayn thought to himself. "Sure no worries." Zayn managed to get out without stuttering. He handed the towel to Harry only sparing him a quick glance before once more seeking refuge on Niall's bed with his books. He waited until he heard the bathroom door close before letting out a silent scream into Niall's pillow. It's too much I can't do this Zayn thought. He hastily picked up his ruck sack and began ramming his books and highlighters inside. All Zayn wanted to do was go home and either speak to Louis or Doniya. He just wanted to hear a friendly voice who loved him. He wanted to lock his bedroom door and feel sorry for himself, and not think about how if he was just brave enough he could be the one taking Harry out, he could be the one kissing Harry at the end of the night and making more plans to see him again. Zayn was getting more agitated as the books wouldn't all fit into his bag where he was trying to shove them in so fast. "For fucks sake."

"Zayn?"

"Fuck Harry you scared me." Zayn said as the books fell out of the bag.

"Sorry. Are you alright, you look a bit frazzled."

Zayn couldn't bring himself to look at Harry in case he was still in that fucking towel. 

"I'm dressed Zayn, you can turn around."

Zayn picked the books back up, placed them carefully in his his bag, zipped it up and then turned to face Harry who true to his word actually had a tshirt and trackies on. 

Harry's face dropped when he realised what Zayn had been doing. "Were you leaving?"

"Erm...."

"I wasn't finished in the shower, were you sneaking out?"

"God Harry, sneaking out makes me sound awful. I just...I got a text from Louis so I was heading home. I didn't want to disturb your shower." Harry knew it was a lie. Zayn knew that Harry knew it was lie, but he also knew he'd never call him out on it.

"Right, ok, sure, if Louis text of course you have to go. Before you go can I please.....like I'm a bit nervous about tonight and erm if I just try on my outfit and you can say if it looks alright. It'll be like five minutes, promise and then you go to Louis." Harry said hopefully.

Zayn was quickly learning how difficult it was to say no when Harry asked him for something. He only had to look at Harry's green eyes silently pleading and he was giving in. "Yeah sure, I've got five minutes." He placed his bag back on the floor and sat down again on the bed. "Go on then, clock is ticking."

Harry quickly turned to his wardrobe and began rooting through his clothes. He picked out a shirt, jeans and boots and began undressing. Zayn's eyes remained firmly on the bed despite the ever increasing temptation to look. Finally dressed Harry raked his hand through his hair and was ready. "Done, you can look now."

Zayn took a deep breath and turned round. 

"Do I look alright?" Harry said uncertainly.

Zayn tried not to gasp at the sight of Harry standing there. He wasn't sure what he'd done in this life to deserve sic exquisite torture but it must have been something awful. Harry was wearing the skinniest jeans Zayn had ever seen. They made Harry's legs look like they went on forever, it also made his thighs look incredible. His boots had a slight heel on them which made it feel like he was towering over Zayn. Zayn's eyes moved up Harry's legs slowly to find a nearly sheer black shirt, he could see the outline of Harry's butterfly and he could clearly see Harry's swallows considering he hadn't bothered doing most of his buttons up. Zayn's heart began to beat rapidly in his chest. He could do this, he could keep it together till he got back to Louis.

"Zayn? Is it too much? I knew it, I look stupid don't I. Just let me pick something else, I won't be a minute." 

Zayn stood up, reached out and took Harry's hand before he could move. "You look lovely Harry." By that Zayn meant impossibly beautiful. "Joe won't know what hit him."

"Are you sure?" Harry asked hesitantly, pulling on the cuffs of his shirt.

"Promise babe." Zayn said as his thumb unconsciously swept back and forth against Harry's palm. "I should go now."

"Louis' text right."

"Yeah. Have fun Harry, and erm Niall is supposed to be making us all dinner at mine tomorrow so you're welcome to join us. I mean like you might have other plans after your date, but the offer is there and we'd love to see you, but only if you're not busy or...yeah...so yeah." Way to articulate Z thought. 

"Thanks Zayn that sounds great." Harry said smiling at Zayn, more than aware of Zayn's hand still in his.

"Also if erm....so like Joe is welcome to come along too." Zayn said unable to look at Harry directly.

"Fuck Zayn it's just one date, you'll have us married off next." Harry laughed, but he sensed that Zayn wasn't finding anything funny about this. "Hey Zayn look at me a second." Zayn carried on looking at the floor until he felt Harry's hand on his face gently tilting it up towards him. "It's just a first date that's all. I've been on them before. It might not even go anywhere."

"I just want you to be happy Harry. If Joe is the one who does that than I'm fine with that. I though that if it went well you might want him to meet us all properly."

"I might want to do that at some point, but not after the first date that's a bit soon don't you think?"

Zayn would have happily introduced Harry to his whole family on the night they met. "Yeah probably, sorry, I'm tired, too much studying I think. I should head home though, don't want to keep Louis waiting." Zayn saw the disappointment in Harry's eyes that Zayn was still going on with the lie, but it was too late to back now. "See you tomorrow babe." Zayn pulled Harry into the briefest hug he could manage.

"See you then, I'll come over with Niall tomorrow. Bye Zayn."

"Bye Harry." Zayn headed out of the door not looking back like he usually did for one final glimpse of Harry. He put his headphones on and began to jog home. All Zayn wanted now was his bed, Misty and Louis.


	10. Chapter 10

Harry had taken his clothes back off since Zayn left and was now lounging around on his bed in just his boxers. He had just over an hour to kill before Joe was due to pick him up and he was bored. Now that Zayn had gone he didn't know what to do with himself. In theory he could have spent the whole hour thinking about Zayn but that would be pointless torment. Instead he phoned Gemma. "Alright Gem."

"Baby Styles how are you?? Why are you phoning me on a Saturday night, shouldn't you be out partying it up with all your posh mates."

"Don't say it like that Gemma, they might be posh but they're lovely."

"Yeah yeah Harry. So why are you calling me??"

"Going out in a bit so just bored wanted you to keep me occupied."

"Where are you off to then?"

"Just the pub."

"Sure it's not some private club. I've seen the riot club Harry I know what happens." Gemma laughed.

"Alright Gemma give it a rest, not everyone here is like that." Harry sighed.

"Everyone is treating you alright, Your roommate and that."

"Niall is amazing, you'd love him. He's this crazy Irish boy who knows everyone and he's really helped me settled in, and he's so funny Gemma." 

"Anyone special on the horizon. I bet you've got those posh boys lining up to take you out. Remember what I said though." 

Gemma had a real issue and Harry knew that was partly the reason he hadn't mentioned Zayn to her so far. "I could hardly forget, you bang on about it enough."

"Hey, just looking out for you Haz."

Harry could hear the hurt in Gemma's voice. "I know. Erm, I do have my first date tonight."

"Ooh details Harry!!"

Harry spent the next forty minutes talking to Gemma about Joe. Naturally she approved, Jooe had been a scholarship kid after all. They talked about what life was like at Oxford for Harry and not once did Zayn's name cross his lips. 

 

****************

 

Zayn arrived home to find the house thankfully quiet. No sounds of Louis moaning, just beautiful silence. He headed straight to his room threw his bag on the floor and flopped down on his bed without even bothering to switch his light on. He didn't have long to wait before he felt the bed dip behind him as Louis crawled into bed behind him, and began spooning him. 

"Why you laying all alone in the dark Zayn?"

Zayn just lay there and pulled Louis' body closer to him. "Love you Louis, always have always will."

"Don't bite my head off but is this anything to do with Harry?" Louis whispered in Zayn's ear. 

Zayn let out a big sigh and eventually rolled over so he was facing Louis. "Why do I fuck everything up Lou. I just....fuck....I just want to be brave for once you know. I should have just told Harry how much I liked him from the start and fuck the consequences. But no I have to take it slow and be his friend, and now he's going out on a date with Joe fucking Teller."

"Research Joe?? Hot research fellow Joe."

Zayn glared at Louis. "Not helping Lou."

"Sorry Zayn, but fuck me how the hell did Harry pull him!"

"It was on Secret Santa night."

Louis had the grace to look embarrassed. "Oh right. Sorry."

"Also Harry is way hotter than Research Joe, so if anything Joe is punching well above his weight." 

Louis just looked at Zayn. 

"Fine not well above his weight, he's hot obviously. Fuck, can we please stop talking about his level of hotness when he'll be picking Harry up in oh thirty minutes." 

"Alright love what do you want to talk about?" Louis waited patiently for Zayn to respond.

"Do you think I'm a fuck up Louis?" Zayn said miserably. 

"If you're a fuck up then what does that fucking make me Zayn. You're hands down the best person I know. You've got me out of more scrapes than anyone deserves, you're always there for me even when I'm being a moody fucker, you're my best friend and I love you like no other."

"Then why do I always fuck up relationships, what's wrong with me."

Louis pulled Zayn closer until his face was nuzzled into Louis' neck. "Oh love there's nothing wrong with you, stop saying that. The other relationships you've been in and how and why they ended was not on you."

"You're my best friend you have to say that." Zayn whined.

"You are absolutely my best friend and I have never been anything but honest with you always, even if it hurt."

"Still not quite forgiven you for criticising my kissing skills." Zayn smiled into Louis' neck.

"Hey, you'll thank me when Harry is reaping the benefit."

Zayn sighed again. "That's never going to happen Louis."

"Well it won't with that attitude grumpy pants. Look Zayn, you obviously really like him, and it's clear that he really likes you. Fuck, we've all had to sit there on numerous occasions and watch you flirt with each other for a whole evening, and don't even get me started on how he stares at you when he thinks nobody is looking."

"Oh yeah he's so into me that he's about to get picked up by Research Joe for a date." Zayn grumbled.

"Right Zayn Malik truth time now." Louis said slightly raising his voice. "Brace yourself. The reason Harry is going out on a date is because despite all your flirting you've made it perfectly clear to him that you do not want to be in a relationship with him."

"Well yeah but....."

"No buts Zayn. What is he supposed to do, spend his whole first year at Oxford pining over you and waiting for you to get your sht together? As much as I love you Malik, that's not really fair on Harry is it?"

Zayn burrowed in closer to Louis. "No."

"What was that? I can't quite hear you as you try to climb into my skin."

Zayn pulled away and stared at Louis. "I know I'm being unreasonable Lou, I just....." Zayn took a deep breath and closed his eyes so he wouldn't have to see Louis' face. "I like him a lot, probably an inappropriate amount for how long I've known him. It's not just because he's beautiful, I mean that is a reason sure, but I've never met anyone like him before, he's so clever and....."

"Oi, rude." Louis said gently elbowing Zayn.

"You know what I mean Louis. He's on a scholarship because he's so clever, and he works so hard. He's got two fucking jobs and he never complains. He's funny, he makes me laugh, and he's fuck, he's a good person, far too good for me I know. I'm just some rich boy who's never wanted for anything in his life and he's Harry, working his arse off to make something of himself. Why on earth would he want me when he can have Research Joe."

"One, despite the fact you're from money your life has not been easy love. Two, Harry would be lucky if he ended up with you. Three, stop painting Harry as some kind of scholarship martyr working two jobs, you know he'd hate that. Four, you need to tell him that you like him. Five, you need to tell him that you like him. Can you guess what six is???"

Zayn sighed. "I need to tell him that I like him."

"Are you going to do that?"

"No. I'm going to pine from afar because I think Harry has the ability to break my heart babe and I don't think i can handle that. You of all people know what I'm like when I fall for someone and I can't take the risk that Harry doesn't like me as much as I like him. Plus he's Niall's...."

"Please don't give me that roommate crap, that's an excuse and you know it."

"I saw Harry naked."

Louis punched Zayn on the arm. "What the fuck Zayn, why didn't you start with that. So details. Length, girth, you know all the good stuff."

Zayn couldn't help laughing. "I'm not telling you that. Fuck he's hot Lou, like ridiculously so. I had to turn round and walk back in the bathroom and sort myself out."

"With your hand?" Louis said quickly.

"No!!!" Zayn shouted. "It was a bit overwhelming all at once, and he has tattoos and yeah it was a lot you know. Then I had to carry on studying while he was having a nap with just his boxers on for fucks sake, and then he had a shower and so I had to see him in a towel and then...."

"Take a breath love."

"The shower thing was too much for me. I was about to leave while he was still in the bathroom, but he caught me and asked me before I left to tell him if the date outfit he'd picked was alright."

"Was it?"

Zayn turned over and buried his face in the pillow. He sighed before turning back to Louis with a frown.

"That good eh?"

"Honestly Louis you have no idea. He had a pair of boots with just a tiny heel which made him seem extra tall. Skinny fucking jeans that he must have painted on. No way could a human get in them, and they made his legs go on forever, and his thighs, fuck so strong. Then this almost sheer shirt, so you could see a hint of the tattoos on his chest especially with the five fucking buttons he had undone. Oh and when he got out of the shower his biceps are immense. He is really strong, he could pick me up and slam me up against a door easily. "

"Oh Zayn."

"I invited them for dinner tomorrow." Zayn admitted.

"You did what?"

"I invited Harry, and then I panicked and invited Research Joe as well."

"Do you think he'll come?"

"Harry will, but not Research Joe thank fuck." 

"It's going to be weird if we don't ask him about his date, are you ready for that?" Louis said gently.

"No, but I've not really got much choice have I." Zayn groaned.

"You're a million times better than rResearch Joe Zayn, I won't hear any different."

"Love you Lou."

"Love you too Malik. Now, cuddle then smoke?"

"Sounds like a plan." Louis said as he snuggled into Zayn.


	11. Chapter 11

Harry was nervous. He'd been ready for fifteen minutes and was now trying desperately hard not to sweat through his shirt. "Fuck it." Harry slipped his shirt off and laid back down on his bed waiting for Joe. He wasn't nervous because he was going out with Joe, he was nervous because of what happened with Zayn earlier. Harry knew he had feelings for Zayn and he knew that Zayn had feelings for him. Not for a single second did Harry believe that Louis had text Zayn. He didn't want to make Zayn feel awkward, so he had just played along with it and now he was lying on a bed wishing Zayn would just tell him how he felt. Harry nearly fell off the bed at the knocking on the door but managed to safely manoeuvre his way there without any mishaps. He opened the door to find Joe who burst out laughing.

"Fuck Harry, I was hoping to get you out of your clothes at the end of the night. I didn't really think it would happen at the start." Joe let his eyes roam over Harry's body before looking back up at him and winking.

"Shit. I totally forget I didn't put my shirt back on. Come in I'll be thirty seconds. God this is so embarrassing." Harry could feel himself blushing. 

"No worries mate, I didn't realise you had so many tattoos. Maybe I can show you some of mine later?"

"You've got tattoos."

"A few, nowhere near as many as yours though."

Or Zayn, Harry thought. God he needed to stop that right now, he was going out on a date with Joe. He threw his shirt back on and grabbed his wallet, phone and keys from his bed. "Right all done."

"You not planning on putting any shoes on then Harry."

"Oh for fucks sake." Harry sat back down and pulled his boots on. "Right, really all done this time. So where are you taking me then?"

"There's a pub round the corner from the Hope they have this open mic night I thought it might be fun to check out. There's usually a couple of good live bands but it's not so noisy we won't be able to hear each other."

"Sounds great, I love live music."

"Let's go then." Joe took Harry's hand and they made their way to the pub. It was a short walk and Joe talked some more about his latest research project, and Harry chatted on about how he was slowly adjusting to Oxford. Before they knew it they were at the pub and settled in for the evening.

The open mic night with Joe had flown by. Joe was easy to talk to, he understood what it was like for Harry living and studying at Oxford. He was also surprisingly funny and he looked good. Really good. He'd been encouraging Harry all night to participate in open mic night once he'd found out Harry could play the guitar, but Harry kept on refusing. "Not a chance Joe, maybe in the privacy of my room I'll give you a show."

"Are we still talking about your guitar Harry?" Joe winked. 

Harry had to give it to Joe he was a smooth fucker. "You're terrible. "

"So do you think maybe we could do this again sometime??"

Harry pretended to think about it as if it was a tough decision. "Yeah I suppose I can give you another chance to impress me."

"Oh I've got to impress you, maybe you'll have to impress me next time Harry. Think you can manage that?"

"I'll bring my best Teller."

"Come on then I'll walk you home." 

"Proper gentleman you Joe." 

Joe took Harry's hand and they left the pub. All in all Harry had enjoyed the evening. There was no pressure, being with Joe was easy, he didn't have to second guess every move he made. Granted there was no swooping stomach when Joe touched him but it was pleasant enough. They finally reached Harry's room and Harry felt nervous at the thought of kissing Joe. "So this is me then."

"I know Harry I picked you up remember."

"Crap sorry."

"It's alright. Are you nervous?" Joe said.

"A little maybe." Harry confessed.

Joe leant in slowly giving Harry ample time to pull away but he didn't, he let Joe's mouth slowly brush against his before pulling back. "See Harry nothing to be nervous about."

Joe was right because it was nice being kissed by Joe, he had nothing to be nervous about. "I'll call you yeah, and we can sort something out."

"I'd like that Harry." Joe waited until Harry opened his door before waving and waking away. 

Harry went inside his room and as expected it was empty. That was a lovely end to a pleasant evening. Joe was nice. Harry liked him, but he wasn't Zayn and Harry knew he was fucked.


	12. Chapter 12

Zayn had one of the worsts night sleep he'd ever had despite Louis' presence in his bed. They'd smoked some weed and flaked out about 2am, but Zayn had only managed about two hours sleep. Zayn's mind was constantly buzzing with images of Harry and Joe and what they might be doing, how their night went, if they kissed, if Harry was waking up beside Joe this morning. Zayn slid out of Louis' arms and made his way to the shower to wash the stench of weed off himself before Niall and possibly Harry arrived later. Zayn was conflicted. He wanted to see Harry, but he also wasn't really up for hearing about Harry's date with Research Joe. Zayn had no idea that what he felt for Harry was going to run this deep so quickly. He'd always fallen hard and fast in the past but nobody had made him feel like Harry did. It was thrilling and terrifying in equal measure 

****************

Harry woke up to the sound of Niall singing loudly in the bathroom. He hadn't had that much to drink last night so there was no hangover for Harry to recover from, just a sense of missed opportunity. Niall walked out of the bathroom all dressed and ready to go. "You should have woken me mate."

"Nah you looked too cute sleeping I didn't want to disturb you."

"What time do we have to be at the boys house?"

"In about twenty minutes."

"Fuck Niall you should have woken me. Right I'll be ready in fifteen then we can go." Harry grabbed his phone and shot off a quick text to the boys. 'Niall just woke me up, jumping in the shower, we'll be there as soon as.'  


"I've let them know we'll be there as soon as possible."

"I'm always late Harry, they don't care by now."

"I'll be as quick as I can." Harry grabbed some clothes and went to the bathroom. He jumped in the shower and left the hot water ease the muscles in his back. He was still adjusting to the mattress on his bed. When he'd sent a text to the boys he'd seen there was one waiting from Joe. He'd read it on the way to dinner but he couldn't imagine he was getting the brush off after they had a good time. Harry ignored the nagging feeling in his stomach saying that he was almost hoping for a brush off, hoping that it was a text saying I had a great time but let's just be friends. Harry pushed that feeling away until all he was filled with was a positive outlook on what might happen next with Joe. He got out of the shower, dried off and threw a tshirt and skinny jeans on. Harry went back into the room to find Niall sitting on his bed strumming his guitar. 

"We need to have a jam session mate. I know someone from the music department who'll let us play in the studio if I buy them a few pints. Would you be up for that?"

"Yeah for sure man."

"We can ask the rest of the boys to join us as well."

"Oh do they play too?"

"Lou plays a bit of piano, Liam plays drums, and Zayn sings."

As if Zayn wasn't perfect enough, he also sang. "Sounds like fun, maybe we can set something up when we go over today."

"Cool I'll text Sara and see when she can let us have the studio. Right you ready for another amazing roast courtesy of Niall Horan."

"Always ready for those. Maybe one day I'll make pudding for you all as a thank you."

Niall was halfway out the day when he stopped. "Woah woah woah. Pudding? Have you been holding out on us Styles?"

"I've been known to cook a little bit Horan." 

"Right next weekend your turn to cook."

"Deal." Harry said.

 

****************

 

Zayn was sitting in the front room anxiously listening out for the sound of the doorbell. He just wanted this dinner out of the way now. Louis came and sat next to Zayn and kissed him on the cheek. 

"You alright love?"

"Not really, but I'll get through it. It's only a dinner after all. If the date went well I'm going to have to get used to the fact that Research Joe might be around a bit, so I'm going to try and use today as a test to see how I handle Harry talking about it." 

"If I see you struggling I'll change the subject and start chatting shit."

"Like every day then."

"Rude. Lucky I love you Malik. Now bring it in for a hug." Louis held out his arms and Zayn snuggled into them. 

"Thanks babe. Love you." Zayn jumped at the sound of the doorbell. "Fuck. Right. I guess this it then. I can do this can't I Lou?"

"You've always been able to do anything you want Zayn. Happy face on and let's get through this shit." 

"I'll get it." Liam shouted from the kitchen and a few minutes later Harry and Niall were standing in the front room. 

"Alright boys I'm going to crack straight on in the kitchen with some prep. Give me half hour then we can relax with some beers for a bit before its ready. Liam you are my sous chef today lets go." Niall walked straight into the kitchen followed by a reluctant Liam.

Zayn and Louis were sitting on the sofa whilst Harry was nervously still standing. "Sit down Harold. No standing on ceremony in this house."

Harry sat down in the chair opposite. He was nervous. He looked over at Zayn who was deliberately looking at the floor. Harry thought how unfair it was that Zayn could look so good dressed in a pair of ratty shorts and a sleeveless tshirt. This was exactly what Harry was worried would happen. Zayn being all weird and nervous after yesterday. 

"So, what shall we talk about then. Harry anything exciting happening in your world at the moment?"

"Lou." Zayn hissed at him.

"No? Right let's play some Fifa. Harry, Zayn you both up for that?" Without waiting for an answer Louis grabbed the controller and started setting up. "Good."

The next half hour was excruciating. Niall and Liam could be forgiven for thinking that Louis was playing Fifa by himself with the lack of noise coming out of Zayn and Harry's mouths. Both of them feeling too awkward to say anything. Zayn was up in his own head now thinking that Harry's date must have gone so well that he didn't want to talk about it, and Harry was thinking that Zayn was upset with him.

"Jesus, it's like a fucking graveyard in here it's so quiet. That's most unlike you all." Niall said as he wandered in from the kitchen.

"Yeah isn't it." Louis said sarcastically.

"Dinner will be ready in a couple of hours so let's get into the beers and me and Liam will join you in a bit of Fifa, and  
let's put some fucking music on or something."

"I'll sort the music." Zayn got up and walked into the other room selecting a playlist at random. He jumped when he felt Harry's arms encircling his waist and his chin resting on Zayn's shoulder. 

"Are you alright? You're a bit quiet." Harry whispered. 

"Tired. I slept with Lou last night so I didn't get much actual sleep." Zayn felt Harry immediately tense up and pull back slightly.

"Oh right yeah. I didn't realise you and Louis were a thing, I should have guessed because you're really close and that."

"What does that mean?" Zayn turned round to find Harry looking at him with a frown.

"You and Louis. I thought him and Liam were like you know, I didn't realise you were involved too." Harry said trying really hard not to let any judgement come through.

"Erm I meant we slept in the bed as each other. I didn't feel too good so Louis was keeping me company. God Harry it would be like sleeping with my brother, you know that."

Harry felt the relief sweep through him. He knew it wasn't fair considering he'd gone out with Joe but he couldn't help it.

"Would it bother you? If I was fucking Louis I mean." Zayn wondered.

"No you can do what you like." Harry said hoping his voice didn't sound as shaky out loud as it did in his head.

"Good, because it would be a bit weird considering you went out on a date last night." Harry flinched at the tone in Zayn's voice and instantly Zayn felt mean. "Shit, sorry Harry I didn't mean that. No sleep makes me grumpy." Before Harry got a chance to respond Niall poked his head round the door.

"Harry you went on a date and didn't tell me! In the front room now, I want details."

"Go on, I'll sort out the music."

Harry and Niall went back to the front room leaving Zayn to pick a playlist that hopefully wasn't reflective of his sad mood. Zayn settled on some indy crap he knew Harry would like and wandered back to the boys. He sat down on the sofa as close to Louis as he possibly could without actually climbing in his lap.

"Did you all know that Harry had a date last night?" Niall said.

"I only really told Zayn, I didn't want to make a big fuss and I would have told you Niall but you were still at Tara's."

"So details then Harry, who was he, where did you go, how far did you go." Niall was like an over excitable puppy.

"Erm, so...." Harry hesitantly looked at Zayn who was trying to look anywhere but at Harry. "Do you know Joe Teller?"

"No freaking way. Research Joe, who studies in your pub, tall dark, incredibly handsome, blue eyes, swears a lot Joe." Niall's eyes lit up. "Oh my god Harry that is so exciting." 

"Alright Niall, anyone would think you're the one dating Research Joe." Louis joked.

"I'm just happy for Harry. From what I've heard and know about Research Joe, he's a great fella and I think he'll be good for him."

Great everyone loves Research fucking Joe thought Zayn, although to be fair Niall loved everyone. Zayn didn't really want to have to sit here and hear all about what a great person Research Joe was, but he didn't really have much of a choice.

"So where did he take you Harry?" Liam asked.

Even Liam was interested, great.

"The pub just around the corner from the Hope, there was an open mic night which was brilliant. I told Joe I play guitar and he kept on trying to get me to go up, but not a chance. We stayed there just talking and listening to the music really, until it had finished and then he walked me home."

"Ooh a proper gentleman, did you hold hands." Liam continued.

Zayn had to look down as Harry blushed.

"Maybe." Harry said quietly.

"So what happened when you got home? I know he didn't stay over because you were alone when I got in this morning. Did he kiss you goodnight?" Niall said eager for details.

Zayn felt Louis' reassuring hand on his thigh rubbing gently. Lou was the best.

"Maybe, just a small one though."

"No tongues then no?" Niall joked.

"No tongues Niall, not yet anyway."

Zayn felt his stomach roll and although he hadn't eaten since yesterday he felt like he was going to throw up. "Sorry Niall, how much longer do you think dinner will be?"

"Li and I will go check, but I reckon another hour or so."

"Right, would anyone mind if I went and just had a quick kip until then? I didn't sleep very well and I've got a bit of a headache so I thought I'd rest up for a bit. Need all my strength for Niall's amazing dinner."

"I've made extra potatoes so you'll need all your energy for those mate. You go and have a lie down and we'll carry on with Fifa and quizzing Harry about his date."

"Cheers mate." Zayn got off the sofa and walked straight to his room without even looking at Harry. 

"Right, I'll check on the food. Liam grab some more beers, Louis get another match set up, Harry get ready for more questions." Niall and Liam headed out to the kitchen leaving an uncomfortable Harry alone with Louis. The silence only grew as Niall and Liam seemed to be taking a lifetime in the kitchen. Harry could feel Louis' eyes on him.

"You should go talk to him." Louis said.

"He said he needed some rest." Harry responded weakly.

Louis sighed. "Harry, you and I both know that's not why Zayn has gone to his room. Go. After. Him."

"Maybe he doesn't want me too."

"Fucks sake Harry, I'm his best mate go to his room now, trust me." 

Harry still looked doubtful.

"Please Harry." 

Harry looked up at the sincerity and almost pleading that he could hear in Louis' voice. "Yeah alright." 

"Thanks."

Harry took a deep breath and began walking to Zayn's room. Unlike last time he couldn't hear Zayn talking to Misty so he stopped for a minute to gather his thoughts before finally knocking on the bedroom door.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for feelings of anxiety. Not a full on anxiety attack, but just in case.

Zayn was lying fully clothed face down on his bed. He knew he had to pull himself together to be able to make it through dinner, he figured that if he ducked out for an hour that would give Niall enough time to quiz Harry about the date with Research Joe. Then he could just come back in for dinner and hopefully the conversation would have moved on to something else, if not then Zayn knew he could rely on Louis to steer the talk in a different direction. Zayn didn't even move when someone knocked on his door. "I'm fine Lou, you don't have to check up on me."

"Er it's not Louis, it's Harry."

Zayn could hear the hesitance in his voice. Zayn sat up and looked at the door. "I'm fine Harry, you don't have to check up on me."

"Can I come in Zayn?"

"I'm fine, I need some sleep that's all."

"Please Zayn, for a minute?"

Zayn knew Harry wouldn't go until he'd seen him. He sighed and sat up on the bed, trying to make himself look half decent before he let Harry in. "Hold on." Zayn nipped in the bathroom and quickly splashed his face with water, he dried his face and then looked in the mirror. All he could see was tiredness. His eyes were rimmed with red, but he could say he'd been smoking up to explain that away. He had big dark circles underneath his eyes, but he could blame that on the no sleeping. "Always an excuse for everything." He took a deep breath and laid back down on his bed. 

Zayn really wished Misty was here to give him something to hold and concentrate on, but she was hanging around the kitchen hoping for some scraps of food. "Come in." Zayn's breathing quickened as the door slowly opened to reveal Harry standing there nervously. Harry stood there not knowing what to do. "I said you could come in Harry."

"Yeah sorry." Harry tripped forwards in an all too clumsy way and Zayn couldn't help but smile fondly at him. Last time he was in Zayn's room he'd sat down next to him on the bed, this time he took the chair and a little twinge of sadness went through Zayn at the thought Harry might be distancing himself from him already after his date last night.

"Did you want something?" Zayn said with tiredness in his voice.

Harry kept his eyes firmly planted on the floor as he replied. "Are you cross with me? Like because of the date with Joe. Is that why you've hidden yourself away in your room? Have I upset you?"

Zayn felt sick at the sadness he could hear in Harry's voice. He scrambled off the bed and knelt down in front of Harry, taking Harry's hands into his. "Hey, look at me babe."

"I'm sorry if I made you mad." Harry said still looking down at the floor.

"Haz look at me, please." Zayn waited till Harry looked up only to feel guilt come crashing down on him at the utter misery etched in Harry's eyes. "Fuck. I'm not cross with you, I promise." 

"Then why are you in here on your own? You invited me over for dinner, I thought that meant we'd be hanging out together and please don't give me that crap about not sleeping very well."

Zayn had the decency to look embarrassed. "I didn't sleep well, that wasn't a lie." Zayn had a choice, he could be brave and tell Harry that hearing about his date with Joe was too much, or he could continue with the pretence. "Fuck." Zayn got up from his knees and sat on the end of his bed. He turned Harry's chair around so he could face him and once more held his hands. "Ok. So....erm....I want to say again that I'm not cross with you. If anything I'm cross with myself."

"Why?" 

"Shit, I'm really not very good at stuff like this." Zayn began rubbing his thumb across the small cross tattoo on Harry's hand to calm himself. He concentrated on Harry's hands so he wouldn't have to see his face. "I like you Harry."

"I would hope so because I like you too." Harry joked.

"No I mean I really like you. I tried so hard not to, because like I said before you're Niall's roommate and this is your first year and I don't want to ruin the experience for you. I didn't want to tell you how much I liked you, because I don't want to make you feel awkward around me Harry. I thought maybe I had it all under control, and then you told me about Research Joe and I got a bit jealous so I apologise for that. I had no right to do that. I'm sorry I made you upset and worried that you'd upset me because you haven't. I can try and be better, I'll listen to your date stories, and we can still hang out if you want. I'd like us to still be friends despite this Harry, if that's alright?" Zayn kept his eyes firmly on Harry's hands, he couldn't bear to see what Harry was thinking.

"I'm sorry Zayn, but that's not going to be alright." Harry said softly.

Zayn pulled his hands from Harry's, got off the bed and began pacing up and down his room. "Yeah right, of course. God this is so embarrassing." Zayn put his head in his hands. "I am so sorry I made you feel uncomfortable Harry. Alright, we can sort this out. You can still go out with the boys and that, and erm I'll just see other people on those nights. Anytime you want to come round you can, I'll either go out or I can study in my room. I won't let it ruin your time here. I won't honestly Harry, I promise." Zayn said, the agitation clear in his voice.

Harry reached out and grabbed Zayn's hand. "Zayn."

"I'm sorry Harry, I'm so so sorry. I've embarrassed you and myself and I do this all the time and it's why no one wants me and that's alright that's ok I'm a difficult person to want and I've really only ever had my family and Louis and sometimes you know I'd just like a bit more, and I'd hoped that maybe, but no just wishful thinking and so I'll keep out of your way, but like if we could erm maybe be civil to each other for the boys sake that would be great." Zayn could feel his breathing getting ragged. "Harry could you get Louis for me please."

"Zayn are you alright? I didn't....."

"Harry please I really need Louis." Zayn said trying not to let the anxiety and embarrassment get the better of him.

"Yeah sure, erm sit down and I'll go get him."

Zayn sat down on the bed and put his head between his legs and began breathing slowly. He pinched his thigh to keep himself grounded and began counting. 

"Zayn?"

Zayn looked up to see see Louis standing in the doorway with a worried looking Harry standing beside him. "Hey Lou, can I borrow you for a minute." 

"Course love."

"Only you though." Zayn tried to ignore the look of hurt on Harry's face. 

Louis turned to Harry and whispered in his ear. Harry nodded and shut the door. Louis sat down next to Zayn and held his hand. "What happened?"

"I told Harry I liked him as more than a friend and he basically said we couldn't be friends anymore." Zayn said sadly.

"He said what?? Hold on. Harry get in here, I know you're listening at the door. "

"Louis no, I'm already embarrassed enough."

"All this fucking about stops now love alright."

Harry opened the door and inched his way inside hesitantly. "Are you alright Zayn?"

"Harry did you or did you not say you and Zayn could no longer be friends."

"Kind of, but Zayn didn't let me finish because that's not what I meant." Harry said firmly.

"I don't understand." Zayn said. "I said can we just be friends and you said no."

Realisation dawned on Louis' face. "Dicks the both of you. I'm giving you fifteen minutes to sort this out then I'm coming back in to drag you out for dinner."

"Lou? Don't."

"Zayn you'll be thanking me in fifteen minutes, promise. Harry don't fuck this up or else I'll fuck you up. Promise."

"Yes Louis." Harry was a little bit scared of Louis, not least because he was Zayn's best friend. Louis left the room leaving Harry and Zayn to it. Harry sat on the bed next to Zayn and gently took his hand. "I used to get told off all the time when I was little for talking slowly so I hope fifteen minutes is long enough." 

Zayn couldn't help smiling at the idea of a curly haired green eyed little Harry with his slow drawl. 

"My Mum always taught me and Gemma to be brave. We didn't have much growing up but Mum made the best of what we did. She taught us to be strong and bold and for the most part that's how I live my life. Until I came to Oxford, and I was scared because all this is totally different to anything I've ever experienced. I'm so out of my element it feels like I'm drowning at times Zayn, but I put a brave face on and I think I'm managing alright. I thought the scariest thing about coming to Oxford would be being a scholarship kid amongst all you rich boys. I was so nervous I threw up four times on the way down." Harry felt Zayn squeeze his hand gently. I can do this thought Harry. "You Zayn though, you terrify me. Not just because you've got money, but fuck you're beautiful."

"Harry."

"No please, let me finish. When I said earlier I didn't just want to be your friend I meant it. I had a really good night with Joe, he's nice and kind and funny and easy on the eye..." Harry felt Zayn trying to pull away but he held his hand firmly. "But he's not you Zayn. If I thought for one minute I had a chance with you I would never have gone out with him, but, you never said anything and it's not fair to make me feel guilty for going out with him."

"I know Harry, I didn't mean to."

"I understand that you didn't want to get involved with me because I'm Niall's roommate and so that might make things a bit awkward. I actually get that. All the stuff about not wanting to ruin the experience for me because it's my first year though, that's not fair Zayn. You can't make decisions for me because you think you know better. I decide Zayn, me. What if my experience is being ruined anyway because you are so determined not to be with me? What if my experience at Oxford is bettered by being with you? Shouldn't I at least have some say in what my experience should be? I want you Zayn. I have from the start, and I do want us to be friends, but I don't think I can just be friends, not anymore."

"What about Research Joe?" Zayn mumbled.

"Joe is a good bloke, but it was one date. I think I can explain that to him, but only if you're willing to give this a try Zayn. Do you want to?"

"Yeah of course, but what if I fuck it up? My past track record isn't exactly the best and....."

"I don't give a fuck about what happened in your past Zayn. I really like you and I at least think we should give it a try." Harry said hopefully. "I'm being brave here love so don't leave me hanging." 

"Zayn if you don't say yes I will come in there and punch you." A voice said from outside.

"For fuck's sake Lou, have you got your ear pressed up against the door or something?" Zayn said.

"No, but I gave you fifteen minutes and now they're up. So please say yes so we can enjoy the rest of the day. Nobody wants to see your moody face all day."

"Oi I wasn't being moody you dick."

"Maybe a little bit love." Harry chipped in.

"Traitor." Zayn smiled at Harry. "We'll be out in five minutes Louis. Both of us. Together."

"My work here is done, I will now go back to aggravating Niall and Li in the kitchen."

"So does together mean we are together as in we are going to give this a try?" Harry said eagerly. 

Zayn took a deep breath and looked at Harry. His green eyes were sparkling, he was smiling brightly his dimples on full show, he looked beautiful. Zayn couldn't believe he had ever thought this might not work. "Yes we are going to give this a try."

Harry may have squealed although he would deny that forever, he did, however, pull Zayn into his arms where they stayed contentedly for a few minutes just enjoying the moment. 

"As much as I'm enjoying this Haz, I think if we're not back out there in a couple of minutes, Louis is going to come barging back in to drag us out."

"Do we have to? I get to touch you now Zayn, I want to make the most of it."

"Harry we hug all the time, this isn't new." Zayn laughed fondly.

"This is though." Before Zayn knew what was happening, Harry had swung himself around so he was now straddling Zayn's legs. "You have no idea how long I've been wanting to do this for. I used to dream about this Zayn."

"Sitting on my lap? Is that what gets you hot Harry?" Zayn smiled.

"You get me hot Zayn, everything about you." Harry bent down and kissed Zayn's neck before sucking a purple bruise onto his skin. 

"Fuck Harry."

Harry gently lapped at the bruise on Zayn's neck. "Now everyone will know." 

"You like that babe, like marking me?"

"Not as much as I like being marked." Harry slowly began to grind down against Zayn. "Want you to lay me out and mark me up. Make pretty bruises on my skin so everyone will know I'm yours. Think you could do that for me love? Mark my skin?" Harry's eyes were black with want, and Zayn's were equally as wide. Harry could feel Zayn begin to get hard as he continued his relentless grinding. 

"Yes Harry, want that so much. But, if we don't stop now I'm going to come in my pants like I'm still at school."

Harry whined and reluctantly slid off Zayn's lap. "Will you take me out? Like on a proper date?"

"I'll date the shit out of you babe. But, I think you should speak to Research Joe first though." Zayn said hesitantly.

"Ok. I'll give him a call tomorrow."

"Thanks. We should probably go back out now before Louis sends Niall in after us."

"Are you sure?" Harry didn't move from Zayn's lap.

"No, but we should stop. It's for the best. We should definitely stop." Zayn sighed as Harry leant in and pushed their foreheads together. 

"I'm going to kiss you so hard after our date Zayn, you've no idea."

Zayn pulled back and licked his lips. "I look forward to it." He slowly pushed Harry backwards until he stood up. 

"Hey you are alright with this yeah? I don't want you to feel like I forced you into something you don't want." Harry said hesitantly.

Zayn looked at Harry standing in front of him, he was so open and honest about his feelings, he was unlike anyone Zayn had ever met before. He stood up and took Harry's hand in his. "I wanted you the first moment I saw you Harry. Remember how I ran outside and Niall had to come and get me? Not my finest ever moment. You were overwhelming." Zayn smiled at the blush that overtook Harry's face and neck.

"From the first moment?" Harry said.

"Yes babe."

Harry beamed. "I like it when you call me babe."

Zayn laughed. "I call everyone babe."

"I know. I like it best when you call me it though. Your voice drops a little when you say it, goes a bit husky. It's hot."

"Thanks babe." Zayn said deliberately lowering his voice. "Now I sound like you."

"Shut up." Harry said gently pushing Zayn. "My voice isn't that deep." 

"I love your voice." Harry's blush deepened. "I love it when you blush too. Does your neck always get flushed, or just when you're embarrassed? Like if I was to get closer to you, would your skin get hotter, or would you get goosebumps? Shall we try it?" Zayn began to advance closer to Harry.

Harry backed up so he was against the door. "I thought you said we should stop."

"Just teasing you babe." Zayn said as he let his hand brush against Harry's arm. 

"You're mean." Harry pouted.

"Fuck you are adorable when you pout."

"Wasn't pouting." Harry sulked.

"Was too." 

Both Harry and Zayn jumped at the loud banging on the bedroom door. "We're coming." Zayn shouted.

"Not literally I hope." Niall said before he burst out laughing. "Oh Jesus I crack myself up sometimes. Dinner is about ready, you two coming out for it?"

Zayn opened the door to Niall's smiling face. "Yes Niall, Harry and I will be joining you all for dinner." Zayn took Harry's hand and they followed Niall down the hallway.

"Hey Zayn?"

"Yeah babe?"

"Like you." 

"Like you too Hazza."

"God Louis was right, you two are going be fucking sickening." Niall complained with a smug smile on his face.

"Shut it Niall, otherwise I'll show Tara those pictures of you when you were fourteen and decided you wanted purple hair."

"You wouldn't." Niall gasped.

"Try it Horan." Zayn glared with a hint of a smile.

"Fine. I'll be good." Niall grumbled.

They reached the lounge to see Liam and Louis sat huddled together in a chair.

"Well if isn't the two love birds. Oh and what is that I spy on your neck Malik. Harry couldn't wait for dinner no?"

"Fuck you Lou." Zayn said before easing his way onto the sofa and pulling Harry down beside him. Zayn put his arm around Harry who used the opportunity to cuddle in closer. Zayn leant down slightly and kissed the top of Harry's head.

"About fucking time." Niall said as Louis and Liam shouted in agreement.

Zayn and Harry just beamed at each other.


	14. Chapter 14

Harry decided to phone Joe as soon as he got back to halls. Niall was wasted after playing drinking games with Louis so he was staying with the boys for the night so Harry had space to talk to Joe alone. He hoped Joe and him could be friends. Joe had an outlook on Oxford that Zayn and the other boys didn't have and he figured that at some point he'd need Joe's advice. Harry also genuinely liked Joe and he didn't want anything to be awkward between them particularly as Joe studied where Harry worked. He sat down on his bed and picked up his phone. Ok this is it. He called Joe's number and waited for him to pick up. Come on come on come on. 

"Harry Styles to what do I owe the pleasure. You must be eager if you're phoning me the day after our date."

There was silence on the phone as Harry pondered where to even begin. 

"Or not eager. Harry are you still there??"

"Shit sorry Joe. So....erm...like...."

"Harry I'm going to stop you there mate. I've done enough of these phone calls myself to know how they go. You just want to be friends yeah??" Joe said.

"It's not that I didn't enjoy it, because I had a really great time Joe. You're such good company and fun, but there wasn't that spark you know??"

"It's fine Harry, honestly. I'm a big boy in so many ways."

Harry couldn't help laughing. "This is why I like you Joe. I'd like to be friends if that's alright??"

"Course, I wouldn't have it any other way. I mean we see each other when you're working and I'm studying so it would be a bit awkward if we weren't speaking."

"God could you imagine."

"Also Harry please feel free to come speak to me if things get tough for you in terms of your scholarship. I've got so much experience that I can be a friendly ear. I know what it's like to be the only scholarship kid."

"Thanks Joe you're being far kinder to me than I deserve."

"It didn't work out, not a big deal. Can I ask why?"

"Well there's....."

"Is it the ridiculously beautiful one with the brown eyes and tattoos?"

"Fucking hell Joe how do you know that??" Harry said, surprised at Joe's knowledge.

"When he's in the pub with the other boys he watches you when he thinks you aren't looking and you do the same with him. You gravitate towards each other without even realising it. It wasn't a big leap mate." 

"Shit, I mean I know I look at him but I didn't realise anyone noticed. Fuck that's embarrassing."

"Nah it's kinda cute, although I will punch you if you tell anyone I said that."

"Your secret is safe with me Joe."

"Thank fuck. If I could give you a couple of words of warning, be careful. You come from a different world to most of the people here, and it may not seem like an obstacle at the start, but it can become one if you don't work at it. Loving someone is hard Harry and that's only multiplied when money is involved. You're a good person and I've only heard good things about Zayn too. I hope it works out for you, just don't forget where you come from, don't get sucked into being a person you're not because in the end it'll break you both. That's my words of wisdom, listen or don't it's up to you. I'll see you at the pub on Tuesday, you can buy me a drink."

"Sounds like a plan. See you then Joe."

"Bye mate." 

Harry hung up and thought that didn't go too badly. Joe was a decent bloke, although he could have done without all   
the don't forget where you come from, that sounded too much like Gemma for his liking. He liked Zayn, he liked him a lot and he wasn't going to let anything fuck this up. If he didn't tell Gemma and his family about Zayn for a little while, then no harm done.

****************

Zayn had been pacing round his room for the past half hour. He'd said his goodbyes to Harry and was now waiting for his call to let him know what happened with Joe. "I mean he could have changed his mind Misty for all I know. Guess I couldn't blame him, I'm not Research Joe after all. He's proper intelligent, he's doing a PhD for fucks sake. I do Art and English, that's piss easy in comparison. Why would he pick me? I'm not anything special. I've got money big fucking deal that's not a talent." 

Misty lay on Zayn's bed washing herself showing a complete lack of disinterest. Zayn knelt down and began to stroke her. "You liked him Misty didn't you?" He laughed as Misty began to purr. "Me too babe." Zayn's phone began ringing and he nearly sprained his ankle in his haste to leap over the bed and pick it up. "Harry??"

"Stop talking to Misty I can hear you in my room."

"Fuck off Lou, I'm waiting for Harry to call." Then he promptly hung up only to find a voicemail message from Harry. He didn't even bother listening he simply phoned Harry straight back. 

"Hello love." Harry drawled. 

Harry's voice was something else, so deep and slow it sent a shiver down Zayn's spine. 

"Hi babe, sorry I couldn't answer I was talking to Lou."

"Why were you talking to Louis on the phone? Isn't he indoors with you?"

"Yeah."

"So why was he calling you??"

"Erm...shit...it's embarrassing." Zayn muttered.

Harry laughed. "Now you have to tell me."

"He was basically telling me to be quiet."

"What were you doing that he needed to tell you to be quiet?"

"Talking to Misty" Zayn mumbled so quietly Harry could barely hear him. 

"Sorry I didn't catch that."

Zayn sighed, he figured he'd better spit it out. "I was talking to Misty and Louis could hear me so he told me to be quiet." 

"You talk to your cat?"

"Don't take the piss Styles." Zayn growled. 

"I wasn't I promise! I talk to Dusty all the time so no judgement from me."

"Really?"

"I think it's cute, tatted up Zayn talking to his cat."

"Fuck you." Zayn laughed and Harry joined in. "So why were you phoning, did you speak to Research Joe?" Zayn said anxiously.

"Yeah I did."

Zayn couldn't tell from Harry's voice if that was a good thing or not. "And....?"

"He was lovely about it. Didn't have a problem and agreed we could be friends." Harry omitted the warning that Joe had given him, Zayn didn't need to know that. "I'm going to buy him a drink next time I'm in work and he also offered to help with like advice and stuff with my scholarship."

"That's great Harry. I was worried he was going to take it really badly."

"Me too a little bit, but he was the complete opposite. You know what that means now?"

"What?"

"You get to to take me out on a date. Better get your thinking cap on, I'm difficult to impress." Harry joked, because Zayn could take him for a walk and that would be good enough for him.

"I've already got some ideas. How about I pick you up next Sunday and we do something."

"I can't wait a whole week to see you Zayn." Harry moaned.

"I'll still see you at the pub during the week, but the wooing won't start until Sunday."

"Wooing? Are we living in Shakespearean England Zayn."

"Hear my soul speak. Of the very instant that I saw you, Did my heart fly at your service." (Tempest Act 3 Scene1). Fuck that was too much thought Zayn, I should have kept my mouth shut, my cool image is rapidly flying out of the window. The end of the line was silent. "Harry?"

"Did you just quote Shakespeare to me?"

"I don't know, is that something you might like?" Zayn said hesitantly.

"Zayn." Harry said with a sigh.

"Fine, yes I did quote Shakespeare at you. Satisfied now that I've embarrassed myself." 

"I thought it was quite lovely actually." Harry said with a hint of fondness in his voice.

"Oh." Zayn said, smiling to himself.

"Did you learn it at school?"

"I was always good at English so I used to work extra hard in those classes. Plus Lou was in a separate class for English so no chance for us to get up to any mischief."

"Naughty at school were you?"

"Nah not really, me and Louis just got bored at lot. People were not always the kindest to him so I looked out for him."

"You're really close to him aren't you."

"I love him, he's the closest I've got to a brother. I love my sisters, but sometimes I needed Louis and he was great, he still is."

"He scares me a little bit." Harry admitted.

Zayn laughs. "He gets that a lot. Lou is a bit like Misty, it takes him a while sometimes to get to know people, but when he does there is nobody better to have on your side. Louis knew how I felt about you so he was just being a little protective which may have come across as standoffish, but he's a good person. He is also really pleased that we got our act together, that way he doesn't have to listen to me going on about it."

"Talked about me a lot did you." Harry said smugly.

"I talked about you a normal amount, don't get big headed." Zayn could't help smiling, he was so far gone for Harry already it was ridiculous.

"So, any hints for the big date?"

"Nope it's going to be a surprise." Zayn waited for a response, but nothing. "Harry you still there?"

"Yeah sorry, erm, so like....I'm not really sure how to bring it up."

"Is everything alright? You haven't changed your mind have you?" Please no thought Zayn.

"Fuck no Zayn, I've waited long enough for this. I just.....the date....so I don't want you to do anything fancy...because like when I take you out I can't reciprocate with anything big Zayn so I'd feel more comfortable if it was like a normal date." Harry was embarrassed.

"Harry I know we haven't known each other for that long, but I like to think I've not given you the impression that I lord my money about. I mean I know I have it, but I'm not the sort of person who rubs it in peoples faces. You get that right?"

"Sorry, I'm so sorry Zayn, I didn't mean to offend you." Harry said hastily.

"Babe shush you haven't offended me, if you're concerned about something I want you to talk to me about it." Not Research bloody Joe. 

Harry let out a sigh. "Ok thanks."

"I do like the idea of you taking me out on a date next time, I bet you're a proper gentleman."

"Not all the time." Harry said dropping his voice low as goosebumps appeared all over Zayn.

"I look forward to the date and to you not being a gentleman then. Will I see you tomorrow? I've got an early class but we could have lunch together if you want?"

"I very much want that Zayn."

"Meet me.....about one o'clock?"

"Can't wait. Night babe."

"Night Zayn."

'Harry?"

"Yeah?"

"Like you."

"Like you more love. See you tomorrow." The line went silent as neither wanted to be the first to hang up. 

"Ok we're not going to be one of those couples, so I'm hanging up Harry."

"A couple?" Harry tried not to squeal.

"Yes?" Zayn said hopefully.

"Good, night again Zayn,"

"Night again Harry." This time both of them hung up at the same time. Zayn rolled over in his bed and laid Misty on his chest. "I think he might be a keeper Misty."


	15. Chapter 15

A week had never gone so quickly. Harry and Zayn had of course seen each other most days, be it around school or at the pub when Harry was working. Zayn was pleasantly surprised at how little animosity Research Joe had towards him. When Zayn walked into the pub on Tuesday night his eyes had immediately flicked to Research Joe who simply smiled and beckoned him over. They'd had a good chat about not letting things be awkward and thy both agreed how lovely Harry was. Now Sunday had arrived and Zayn was once again pacing his room waiting for Harry to arrive. 

"You'll wear a hole in the carpet if you keep that up."

"Ever the wit Lou."

"I try."

Zayn stopped pacing and looked at Louis. "What if he doesn't come."

"Seriously Zayn I love you but I'm not doing this every time. Of course he's coming, not least because he's Niall's roommate so he knows we have easy access to him if he fucks this up with you."

"Not because of my sparkling personality then." Zayn joked.

"Fuck no. Thank god you're hot otherwise you'd literally have no love life." Louis said before Zayn tackled him to the bed. 

"Get off me you dick otherwise I'll fuck your hair up."

Zayn gasped and stared down at Louis. "You wouldn't."

"Try me Malik." Louis said with a mischievous look in his eye. 

Zayn hastily stood up and backed off holding his hand out in order to pull Louis off the bed. The doorbell rang and Zayn dropped Louis' hand letting him fall onto the floor. 

"Ow you fuck."

"Shit sorry Lou." Zayn said as he bent down and helped Louis up. "I think that's him, it must be him right??" 

"Considering Liam and Niall are currently pissing about in the kitchen and they're usually the extent of our guests at the moment I'd say there's a good chance. Now go answer the door you dick."

Zayn ran out of the room to the front door where he could just make out Harry's silhouette. He took two deep breaths to try and calm his racing heart. "You can do this." He opened the door to find the vision that was Harry Styles standing on his doorstep. He looked incredible. His gaze roamed up Harry's body taking in Harry's boots, standard skinny jeans, white virtually see through tshirt, and what the fuck was that. "Babe, I think you've got something in your hair."

"What? Where? Is it twigs, because I walked under a couple of dodgy looking trees on the way here and I wouldn't be surprised if some just fell in there. God I bet it looks like a birds nest doesn't it?"

Zayn didn't think Harry could be more adorable. "Oh no wait my mistake....it's just your headscarf."

"Tosser." Harry said good-naturedly. 

"Sorry I couldn't resist." Zayn said reaching out and pulling one of Harry's curls. Harry's eyes darkened and his breath hitched for an instant. Well that's interesting Zayn thought and made a mental note to revisit Harry's curls in the future. "Come in then, can't have you standing in the doorway all night."

"Do I look alright really?" Harry said uncertainly before giving Zayn a twirl.

Zayn stepped closer to Harry almost crowding him against the door. "If I didn't know for a fact that the nosy bastard trio of Louis, Liam, and Niall are watching us right now, I'd have pushed you up against the door the minute I opened it." Leaving Harry with that image he turned round to find the trio all staring at him. "Alright you nosy fuckers do one and let me take Harry out on his date." Zayn checked his jeans for his wallet, phone and keys and gave the boys the finger. "Don't wait up."

"Zayn." All three boys said at once. "Be good and if you can't be good be careful." They all chorused. 

"Pricks the lot of you." Zayn smiled at them before taking Harry's hand and opening the front door. "You ready?"

"As I'll ever be." Harry said. "Are you going to tell me where we're going?? 

"Nope it's a surprise. We have to drive though is that alright?"

"Drive the way Zayn."

They got into Zayn's car and he pulled away. 

"Hey Zayn are we there yet?" Harry whined.

"You're so not funny."

"You still like me though."

"Like you a lot."

"Like you more." Harry replied. 

They'd been driving about half an hour when Zayn pulled off and Harry gasped. "Zayn I thought we said nothing fancy. Fuck have you brought me to your house. Like is this where you live? Oh my god am I meeting your parents on our first date?" 

Zayn looked horrified. "What!!!"

"Fuck Zayn do you like live in a palace??" Harry said with a smirk on his face. 

Zayn twigged and couldn't help but laugh. "Fuck you Styles, you little shit. I thought you were serious! I thought you thought I lived somewhere like this!"

"Sorry I couldn't help it. You don't live anywhere like this do you?"

"Of course not babe, my house is bigger." Zayn said laughing as Harry's mouth dropped open. "I can tease too Harry. In all seriousness though, my house is big, but it's not anything like this. I was actually thinking that for New Year's maybe you'd want to come stay for a couple of days. No pressure or anything and if you don't that's fine. Just my parents throw this big New Year's Eve bash it's been like a tradition for as long as I can remember. The boys are coming obviously and if you want I thought you might like to. We've got a few spare rooms so you're welcome to one of those. What do you think?"

Harry took Zayn's hand in his and brought it up to his lips where he let his mouth gently brush Zayn's palm. "I'd love to come Zayn thank you."

Zayn's face lit up in delight. He really was beautiful thought Harry. "Really? You'll stay too?"

"Yeah, but like erm if it's alright do you think your parents would be alright if I wanted to stay in your room? But only if you want me to. I mean I don't mind staying in a spare room obviously, but I was thinking that we wouldn't be together over Christmas so like I'd maybe be kinda like...."

"Gagging for it, horny, desperate?"

"Zaaaayn!!!" Harry whined. "I was trying to be romantic. I was going to say I'd be missing you." Harry said blushing. 

"Sorry I shouldn't tease you Harry it's just if I'm being honest you're fucking adorable when you blush." 

"I don't mind being teased sometimes Zayn." Harry said deliberately lowering his voice because he knew the effect it had on Zayn. 

"You do that on purpose don't you."

"Damn fucking straight love." Harry said whilst winking at Z. 

"You're an absolute fucking terror."

"Oh I know." Harry said with no shame whatsoever. "So are we going to go inside Blenheim Palace."

"Not today. I know it's nearly December but the weather is lovely today so I sorted out a picnic for us to eat in the grounds."

"A picnic. Well Mr Malik the wooing is going very well so far. Let's get this picnic out then and tuck in."

They both got out of the car and Zayn walked round to the boot followed closely by Harry. He opened the boot and much to the delight of Harry there lay a couple of blankets, a picnic basket that looked full to the brim, and a large golf umbrella. Harry raised his eyebrows at Zayn.

"I borrowed the umbrella from Niall just in case it rained."

"Quite the planner Zayn, are you always this thorough?" Harry said while subtly running his tongue over his bottom lip.

"Stop that, no distractions from the picnic."

"Ooh authoritative too, I think I like that."

"Shut up and grab the blankets you menace."

Harry smiled cheekily and took the blankets out of the car, also grabbing the golf umbrella at the same time leaving Zayn with just the picnic hamper to lug. Harry managed to find a decent spot near a big tree just in case of rain and if Niall's umbrella ended not being big enough. He spread the blankets out on the ground and Zayn placed the picnic hamper down before opening it with a flourish. "Ta da"

Harry burst out laughing. "Zayn there's basically a shitload of fruit and wine."

"Non-alcoholic wine actually because I'm driving."

Harry took a banana out of the fruit feast and simply looked a Zayn. 'God, I like you so much."

"Like you more babe."

Harry and Zayn spent the next two hours gorging themselves on fruit and non-alcoholic wine. It was the best first date of both their lives. They lay next to each other on the blanket, both of them too full to move. "Fuck Harry, who knew fruit could be so filling. I think if I move I might explode."

"Zayn, what happens to grapes when you step on them?"

"What? Is this a serious question?"

"They wine."

"Oh for fucks sake." Zayn said shaking his head.

"Zayn, why did the tomato blush?"

"I'm not answering you."

"Because he saw the salad dressing." Harry couldn't help the laugh that burst from his mouth and he looked over to see Zayn smiling fondly at him. 

"Hey Zayn?"

Zayn sighed and looked at Harry preparing himself for what was to come. "Yes babe."

"Can I kiss you now please?" Harry said with hope in his voice.

Zayn rolled over till his whole body was facing Harry. "Yeah I'd really like that." It was difficult to say who moved first, both of their bodes seeming to be drawn to one another. Harry's mouth found Zayn's first and he began to gently tug at Zayn's bottom lip with his teeth before Zayn opened his mouth giving Harry easy access with his tongue. They both sighed into the kiss at the same time as Harry's tongue began working over Zayn's mouth. Zayn's hands were in Harrys hair slightly pulling on his curls hard enough to make Harry's breathing stutter. Zayn and Harry simply got lost in the kiss. It was as if everything and everyone just faded away until all that was left was the two of them, the sounds of their breathing echoing in the early evening air. Neither of them had experienced a kiss quite like it. To be so caught up in something that the only thing you were aware of was where your next breath was coming from, in order to kiss the other person for that little bit longer. Harry reluctantly pulled away from Zayn who gave a little mewl as Harry's mouth left his. 

"Why are we stopping?" Zayn moaned.

"Because I can no longer feel my lips and if I'm kissing you Zayn I want to feel all of it."

"Pretty sure I can feel all of you babe." Zayn joked as he could feel Harry's hard cock pressing on his thigh.

"Yeah well you shouldn't be such a good kisser then should you."

"What can I say, I've got skills."

"You've got a big head Zayn, and I'm not talking about the one down here." Harry said as his hand moved slowly down the front of Zayn's jeans.

"Shit Harry, we have to stop now."

"No fair." Harry said before pouting. 

"You are ridiculous. Don't think I'm going to be swayed by your pout darling." Zayn rolled off Harry and lay beside him trying to get his breathing back to normal.

"Can I take a photo?"

"Of me?"

"No of us." Harry took his phone out of his pocket and rolled closer to Zayn. "Ready?"

"Yeah alright." Zayn snuggled in closer to Harry as he took the picture. Harry turned the phone round to check it.

"Oh my god we look sex mussed."

"Sex mussed, who the fuck uses words like sex mussed babe."

"I do and it describes us properly. I mean my lips are swollen as fuck and my hair looks a state."

"That's just your headscarf." Zayn said.

"You love my headscarf."

"It's growing on me." 

"Knew it." Harry said. 

"Will you send me it, the picture I mean?"

"Are you going to make it your background picture?" 

"Something like that." Zayn smiled at Harry.

"There you go all sent."

"Thanks babe."

"Before we head home I just want to say this is the best first date I've ever had. Thank you Zayn."

"God Harry I should be thanking you, I still can't believe you agreed to this." Zayn took Harry's head in his. "Would you maybe like to go out again sometime?" 

"Yes!!!!"

"Playing it cool Styles there." 

Harry giggled. "I can't help it, you make me nervous but in a good way. I figure I don't want to pretend I don't like you, or that I'm not into you because obviously I am. I think we've wasted enough time getting to this point, so yes to another date and you dating the shit out of me I believe you said."

"I could listen to you talk all day and never get bored."

Harry blushed. "Fuck Zayn."

"I mean part of that's because it would take you all day to finish a story, but even so.." Zayn said gently pushing Harry.

"Hey." Harry said pouting.

"Ok let's pack this picnic away and go home. I feel it's only fair to warn you that the boys will be waiting to hear it all about it. One of the disadvantages of going out with me is you get them thrown in as well. Luckily you actually like them otherwise it would have been as awkward as fuck."

With the sun coming down and the lights around Blenheim lighting up the sky, Zayn knelt on the blanket and began clearing away their mess with Harry giving a helping hand. Both of them had never felt happier.


	16. Chapter 16

The end of November passed quickly enough for Zayn and Harry and before they knew it the end of term was almost upon them which meant only one thing. Secret Santa gift giving. Niall had sat Harry down the weekend before and explained in no uncertain times how much Zayn and the other boys wanted him to spend the day with them. They didn't give a fuck that he wasn't participating, they just wanted his company.

"Please Harry, if you don't it will genuinely ruin it for Zayn. If not for me than for him, he can barely function now without you being there."

"Oh come on Niall, we're not that bad."

"Keep telling yourself that. Oh nice skull ring by the way, Zayn has one just like it." Niall joked.

"Fuck you. I'll come, but only because I like Zayn very much."

That had been a week ago and it was now Sunday. The boys had exchanged Secret Santa gifts before Harry arrived, not wanting him to feel any more awkward. Zayn had a gift especially for Harry. They'd agreed not to do gifts but Zayn hadn't bought it he'd made it for Harry instead. Unbeknownst to Zayn, Harry had also done the same. "Lou do you think he'll like it?"

"Considering I've never seen it and so I have no idea what it is I can't really say for certain. But, if you've made it for him Harry will be all over that shit you know how talented he thinks you are. He'll probably come in his pants when he sees it."

"You're disgusting."

"You know what I'm saying is possible. I've heard you two, Harry's not exactly quiet."

"It's payback for all those times I've had to leave the house when you and Liam are together."

Before Lou could respond the doorbell rang and he pushed Zayn out the way to get to the door before him. He opened it with Zayn following close behind him. "Why Harold, fancy seeing you here. Do come in."

"Hi Louis."

Zayn made it to the door just as Harry was walking in. "Hi babe." He reached out and took Harry's hand. 

"Hi." Harry said before brushing a soft kiss against Zayn's cheek. 

"Sickening the both of you. Right you've got at the most twenty minutes before Niall dishes up. Use it wisely." Louis winked before wandering off to the kitchen. 

"Hey so erm I've got something to show you in my room."

"Is it your cock again, because I only saw it yesterday and my mouth needs a rest." harry said, stretching his jaw out.

"Harry!" Zayn laughed. "No it's like....so I kinda... got you...ugh just come with me yeah."

They held hands and walked to Zayn's room, Zayn not noticing the gift bag that Harry was trying to hide behind his back. Zayn opened the door to reveal a rather large box wrapped up in Christmas paper with a huge green bow on it. Harry halted in the doorway. "What is that? Is that for me? Zayn I told you not to get me anything." Harry said sighing. "I didn't want you to buy me anything, you promised."

"I promise I didn't buy you anything, I promise Harry. Please can you open it for me?"

"Yeah ok. Erm so I guess now would also be a good time to give you this as well." Harry held out the gift bag to Zayn. 

"Harry I thought we agreed you weren't going to get me anything. What is this?" 

"I promise I didn't buy you anything Zayn. Just open it for me after I've opened yours?"

"We're idiots aren't we." Zayn laughed. Zayn took the bag from Harry and laid iy on the bed. "Do you want to go first?"

Harry approached the box and began examining it. "It's pretty big."

"That's what he said." Zayn said with a straight face.

Harry burst out laughing. He picked up the box and ripped the paper off in one go. 

"Eager much?"

"I'm excited to see what it is."

"Don't get too excited, it's not all that." 

Harry opened the box and gasped. Inside lay a canvas. "Zayn." Harry was doing his best not to well up so he took a couple of deep breaths.

Zayn looked down at the floor embarrassed. "Is it alright?"

"Oh Zayn." Harry got off the bed and walked towards Zayn. "Look at me."

Zayn looked up and basked in the unrelenting smile on Harry's face. 

"Did you paint this??"

Zayn could only nod. 

"It's beautiful love. You're so talented Zayn. I'm so very lucky to have met you. Thank you darling." Harry said, taking Zayn's hand.

"I wanted to give you a present but I knew you didn't want me to buy you one so I thought maybe I could paint this for you. I don't often do abstracts, but erm so like.....fuck I'm not usually so inarticulate." Zayn said his gaze cast to the floor.

Harry pulled Zayn into his arms and began stroking his back. "Sometimes it's easier to say what you mean when you're not looking at the person."

Zayn took a deep breath."I just wanted to paint how I felt when I first saw you. All the different greens are for your eyes, the different reds for your lips and the various shades of brown intermingled with them are supposed to represent me. I know it's so basic and a bit cheesy which is why I'm crap at abstracts, but I wanted you to know that I care about you a lot Harry." 

Harry knew he was falling hard for Zayn and this about tipped him over the edge. "Like you."

"Like you more babe."

Harry wanted to say love but he didn't want Zayn to freak out. They hadn't been together that long but Harry knew without a doubt his feelings were the strongest he'd ever had. "So did you want to open mine now??"

"Yes!!!" Zayn shouted.

"Now whose eager, but like it's not as amazing as yours because obviously I can't paint so I hope you like it anyway." Harry said anxiously.

"You could have wrapped up a piece of cardboard and I would have loved it because it came from you."

"Really Zayn?" Harry laughed looking down fondly at Zayn's face. "You couldn't think of anything better than cardboard."

"I panicked, I was trying to be romantic and my mind went blank." 

"It's alright, I love the sentiment behind it anyway." Harry reluctantly pulled away from Zayn, picked up the gift bag from the bed and handed it to him. "So Louis and Niall helped me with some of it. Like it's not fancy or anything, just remember that."

They both sat down on the bed and Zayn pulled a box out of the bag. He slowly peeled off the wrapping paper whilst Harry rolled his eyes at him. "It's all about the anticipation babe, haven't I taught you anything." Zayn pulled the paper off with a flourish and sat there for a moment in silence, too overwhelmed to say anything. 

"Zayn do you like it? Is this good or bad silence I can't tell. If you don't like it that's fine I won't be offended." 

Zayn just sat there his fingers gently running over the frame. He took a deep breath, laid the present carefully down on the bed and took Harry's hands in his. "I love you."

Harry gasped and tried to hold back the tears he could feel prickling at the corners of his eyes. 

"I know it's far too soon to tell you that, but I don't really care. If you don't feel you can say it back that's alright too I can wait. I was supposed to wait till New Year's to say it when you came to stay. I had this big romantic plan, I had it all worked out. I was going to make you dinner and take you for a walk around the grounds after. I was going to do up the pool house with candles and shit because I know you love that and then I was going to tell you. Then I opened your present and it's so you Harry that I realised there's never a perfect way to say I love you for the first time. I was making this big grand fancy plan to tell you, but that's not how we are. We're just Harry and Zayn and despite our differences we fit and so I couldn't wait. I hope I haven't scared you off?"

Harry looked at Zayn in awe. "I love you too Zayn. I wanted to say it earlier after you'd given me the painting but I thought I might freak you out so I kept it in."

Zayn's face lit up. "You do?" 

"So much, like you have no idea."

"You don't think it's too soon?"

"Can't put a timetable on love, as my Gran used to say. I think when you know you know and I fucking know. I guess my gift was a hit then." Harry said smugly as he smirked at Zayn. 

"Oh shut up." Zayn looked down at the wooden frame in his hand. Inside the frame were photographs. The centre photo was one of Harry and Zayn after they kissed at Blenheim Palace. Harry's lips were swollen and it was obvious what they'd been doing. It was one of Zayn's favourite pictures of the two of them. Surrounding it were pictures of Louis and Zayn when they were kids, dirt all over Louis' face as Zayn helped him up from falling off his skateboard. One of them showing off their matching Bus 1 tattoos. Some of Louis, Zayn and Niall at an upper sixth party smoking what looked suspiciously like a huge spliff, One from last year at the pub with Liam, one from this year with all five boys after Niall had been victorious at Fifa. There were some of Zayn and his sisters, and Zayn's parents which Louis must have helped Harry with. Interspersed between all of these were pictures that Harry had taken of himself and Zayn on their various outings. Part of the 'dating the shit out of you experience' that Zayn had promised Harry. Some were at the pub, one was at an art exhibition after they'd been thrown out when Harry had taken exception to something offensive one of the artists had said about Zayn. There wasn't a single picture where Zayn didn't look happy which was why the word happiness had been scrawled on the bottom of the frame in Harry's writing. 

"It's absolutely beautiful." Zayn let his thumbs brush Harry's jawline before leaning in and kissing him softly. They exchanged slow easy kisses before Harry allowed Zayn's tongue access. 

The kiss intensified as Harry's tongue fought with Zayn's for dominance. Zayn began tugging on Harry's curls because he liked to play dirty, Harry's tongue stilling for a moment as Zayn pulled harder. 

"Not fair." Harry moaned. 

Zayn pulled away and looked at Harry's flushed face. "Never said I play fair babe." 

Harry moved away from Zayn and placed the canvas carefully up against the wall while Zayn leant over and sat the photo frame on his bedside table. He moved up the bed so he was leaning against the headboard, Harry sauntered back, climbed on the bed and straddled Zayn so he was sitting in his lap. 

"How much longer before dinner is ready Zayn?"

"Enough time. Always enough time for you."

Harry began moving his hips slowly. "Yeah? Like this? Like it I when I grind on you?"

"Fuck Harry." Since they'd been together they'd both lost count of the number of hand and blow jobs they'd given each other. So far they hadn't had sex with each other. There seemed to be an unspoken agreement between them that it was going to happen at New Year's when Harry was staying with Zayn and they were both content with that. Currently their new favourite thing was grinding on each other until they both came. 

"Want me to stop?" Harry asked.

"No, keep fucking going."

"Sure? The boys are just a few rooms away, they'll know exactly what we're doing. Does that bother you Zayn? Or is it a turn on knowing that your door isn't locked and anyone could walk in on us. They'd see me sitting on your lap, grinding down so hard, making all these pretty noises come out of you. Think they'd knock, or just barge in like Louis usually does without a care in the world."

Zayn reached out and grabbed onto Harry's ample biceps pulling him closer. "Wouldn't care. Just want to feel you Harry. Fuck you're so big." Zayn said as Harry once more began grinding down. Harry stopped for a minute to catch his breath. 

"I can't wait till I can finally get inside you Zayn. Going to fuck you so so hard. Make you beg me not to stop. Would you like that?" Harry said as he began swivelling his hips. He pulled Zayn closer so he was practically sitting in his lap. 

Zayns' legs fell open as he clutched at Harry's tshirt, anxious to grip onto something. "Faster babe. I'm so close already, you always make me so hard."

Harry increased his speed as did Zayn. "Love doing this with you Zayn. Makes me feel so dirty, in our clothes just getting each other off hard and fast." They were both panting hard now as they drew closer to the edge. Zayn began pulling on Harry's hair tipping him over the edge. Knowing that he'd made Harry come was enough for Zayn and he found himself coming soon after. "Fuck love."

"Babe you're so good, never been like this with anyone before. Want you all the time." 

Harry slid off Zayn and lay down next to him. He looked down at both their jeans with their obvious tell tale wet spots. "Good job I keep a spare set of jeans at yours now, otherwise I'd be fucked." Zayn burst out laughing.

"Like you."

"Like you more." Harry leant over Zayn and kissed him softly for a few minutes before reluctantly pulling away. "We'd better clean up before Niall's lunch. Louis will absolutely hammer us if we go out there wearing this." 

"Can't wait for New Year's."

"Me too love."

"Oh there's just one more thing. Close your eyes."

"Not another present Zayn, the canvas was enough."

"It's not a present, so trust me. Now close your eyes."

Harry closed his eyes as Zayn got up and walked into the bathroom. He came back out, climbed on the bed and knelt in front of Harry. "Open up."

Harry opened his eyes to find Zayn in front of him looking smug with one hand behind his back."Show me what you've got then." 

Zayn pulled his hand from behind his back and waved a piece of mistletoe in Harry's face. "Told you I'd give you a Christmas kiss under the mistletoe."

Harry's heart ached with longing for Zayn. "Wasn't sure if you'd remember. Should have known." Harry said happily. 

"I've been waiting since the first day I met you to do this. Ready?" Zayn said, holding the mistletoe high above their heads.

"Always." 

Zayn leant in and let their lips brush against each other. They still had their filthy clothes on, but it was the perfect Christmas kiss for them both.


	17. Chapter 17

It had been really hard having to say goodbye to Zayn. Harry had helped Zayn pack up his stuff and then Zayn had gone to Harry's and helped return the favour with Niall shouting at them every time they started kissing instead of packing. 

"Unhand him Zayn, you'll only be away from each for a fucking week I'm sure you can last that long." Niall said.

Harry put on his puppy dog eyes and pouted at Zayn. "Not sure I can." 

"Me too babe."

Niall made gagging noises in the background whilst Zayn and Harry resumed kissing. "Oi more packing less kissing you fuckers." Niall made the fatal mistake of turning round to continue his own packing so didn't hear Harry sneaking up on him. "Ahhhh." Niall shouted as Harry pushed him into the bed before jumping on him and peppering kisses all over his face. 

"Kisses for Niall. Don't be jealous, I still love you Niall, but now it's only Zayn who gets my special kisses."

"Yeah kisses with tongues." Zayn jokes. 

"You two are sickening, get off me Harry you big oaf."

"You've no idea how big Niall." Zayn said, the pride in his voice for his boyfriend apparent.

"The amount of times Harry walks round here naked I reckon I've seen just how big he is more times than you." 

"Wait what?" Zayn said in surprise.

Niall laughed smugly. "You're a lucky bloke Zayn."

Zayn walked over and pulled Harry off Niall. "Stop touching him Niall."

"He jumped on me you fool, nobody can resist my Irish charm. You're just jealous of Narry."

"What the fuck is Narry?"

"Mine and Harry's ship name." Niall chuckled. 

Zayn pulled Harry behind him. "No no no Narry here. Not on my watch Niall." 

Harry wrapped his arms around Zayn's waist and pulled him closer before placing a soft kiss on Zayn's neck. "Narry for friend times. Zarry for sexy times." 

"Seriously you two are both ridiculous." Niall couldn't help but smile at them. "Honestly if I didn't like you so much I'd hate ya." 

This time Zayn joined Harry as they both leapt on him shouting 'Zarriall' at the top of their lungs. 

"Get off me you fuckers." Niall shouted barely managing to contain his laughter. 

"Aww are you going to miss us Ni? Zayn asked. 

"Yes, but we'll see each other in a week. Well unless Zayn locks you in his room Harry and then I won't see either of you."

"Don't worry Niall I'll let him out for drinks breaks to keep up his stamina." Zayn said gently patting Harry's cheek. 

"Excuse you Zayn, how do you know it's not going to be you who needs the drinks breaks."

"I'm definitely learning far more than I need to know about your sex life so get the fuck off me so I can finish my packing. What time is Lou coming to pick you up Zayn?"

"Maybe fifteen minutes or so."

"Right well I'll say my goodbyes now and give you two time alone."

Zayn stood up pulling Niall into a hug at the same time. "Have a great Christmas mate, give my love to your family and I'll see you for New Years."

"Looking forward to it Zayn, give my love to your family too especially Don."

Zayn slapped Niall round the head. "Stay the fuck away from my sister you dick."

"Your parents fucking love me, they're gagging to have me as a son-in-law."

"Over my fucking dead body." 

"Love you Zayn."

"Yeah yeah love you too mate." 

They pulled away from each other and Niall turned to Harry. "Come on then, get in here Styles." Harry hugged Niall whilst Zayn packed some of Harry's clothes. 

"I just wanted to say that I'm glad I got you as a roommate Niall."

"Because without me you wouldn't have met Zayn?"

"No you dick, because I think being at Oxford without you would have been a whole lot harder. I know our initial meeting was a bit rocky, but I'm not sure I would have got through the first term without you. Have the best Christmas and I'll see you at Zayn's."

They carried on hugging until Zayn discreetly coughed. "Am I going to have to start worrying about this Narry thing." Zayn said smiling at them both. 

They pulled apart and Niall made his way to the door. "See you both in a week love you. Zarriall forever." Niall opened the door and was gone. 

"I've finished your packing babe."

"You haven't."

Zayn looked puzzled. Harry's bag was full and there was nothing left for him to take. "Pretty sure I have."

"Forgot to pack yourself love." Harry said blushing. 

"You're ridiculous." Zayn said fondly. He held out his hand and pulled Harry in for a hug. He buried his face in Harry's neck and kissed him. "I know it's only a week but I'm going to miss you so much."

"Me too Zayn. I want you text me every day though and maybe we can Skype a bit too and then before we know it, it'll be New Year and time for me to come stay."

"My sisters are so excited to meet you in person, I think they're more excited about you coming to stay then they are me." Zayn's sisters had talked to Harry on numerous occasions leading up to Christmas. They skyped Zayn regularly and as Harry was there so often he'd join in for part of the conversations. "Oh and fair warning I've told my parents all about you as well and they also can't wait to meet you."

"I hope I'm not a disappointment to them."

"Never babe. Although I don't want to make you feel too under pressure but....."

Harry looked at Zayn warily. "But what?"

"I've never brought a boy home to meet them before."

"Zayn." Harry whined. "Why did you tell me that, now I'm even more nervous." 

"Sorry, I wasn't sure whether to say anything but I just....you're so important to me Harry and I thought if I didn't tell you, then it might freak you out more."

"Do they know I'm on a scholarship??"

"I may have bragged a little about my clever beautiful boyfriend." Zayn said with pride in his voice. 

"They don't mind? That I'm on a scholarship, that I'm not like you?" Harry said timidly. 

Zayn pulled away from Harry and frowned. "My parents aren't snobs Harry. They couldn't give two fucks about where you come from, or what schools you went to, or how much money you have. All they want is for their children to be happy, and you make me happier than I've felt in a long time. I love you Harry and that's all they care about."

"Sorry." Harry said embarrassment visible all over his face. 

Zayn held Harry's hand before gently kissing him. "You don't have anything to apologise for babe. Not ever."

"Ok."

Zayn's phone started to ring so he slid it out of his pocket. It was Louis. "Hey are you here?"

"I'm downstairs, you ready to go??"

"I'll be two minutes alright."

"Course, say bye to Harry for me. See you in a minute."

Zayn hung up and sighed. "Louis' here, he says bye as well."

"I love Christmas but I've never wanted it to go so fast." Harry said weakly. "One last kiss before you go?" Harry leant in and their mouths brushed for one final time before they reluctantly pulled away from one another. 

"Are you sure you'll be alright getting the train to Bradford, I can come pick you up if you'd like?"

"It's fine Zayn, I'm happy to get the train it's not that far." 

"Ok, but if you change your mind just let me know and I'll drive up. I could meet your family at the same time."

You could if my family knew about you thought Harry. As far as they knew he was going to stay with friends for New Years before heading back to Oxford. "Honestly it's fine and plenty of time to meet them." 

"I hope they like me when I do get to meet them."

"Of course they will love." Harry said hoping that Zayn couldn't hear the doubt in his voice. 

"I guess I should get going then." Zayn said with sadness in his voice. "It's only a week that's all, we can do this."

"Like you Zayn."

"Like you more babe." Zayn hugged Harry one last time before heading downstairs to Louis. 

Harry watched out the window as Louis and Zayn waved goodbye. Harry sat at the window a long while before he got off his arse and gathered his bags together. "See you in a few weeks Oxford, it's been fun. Thanks for sending me the boys and my Zayn." Harry sighed and prepared to spend the next week not mentioning Zayn's name.


	18. Chapter 18

It was the slowest Christmas Harry had ever had. He loved being with his family, even though Gemma was driving him mental as all big sisters do. He still missed her though, that would never change. Harry had told them all about his roommate Niall and how fantastic he was, how he helped him find one of his jobs. He told them all about Niall's friends and how they welcomed him into their little group. Not once did he mention their names, not once did he mention he was seeing anyone. All he told them was he'd been on one date with Joe but they'd decided to be friends and that was it. 

"Ooh was he one of those posh boys love?"

"No mum he's actually a research fellow who originally came to Oxford on a scholarship and stayed on."

"That could be you Harry one day if you work hard. How come you only had one date, he sounds lovely."

"Mum you literally know his name and the fact he was a scholarship kid."

"That's all I need to know love, can't go wrong with someone like that." Anne said smiling.

Harry wished he'd never mentioned it. Harry had been texting Zayn constantly, with a few group texts to the rest of the boys and some solo ones to Niall. His family were pleased he seemed to have such a busy social life with the amount of texts he was getting, he didn't disabuse them of that notion. Before Harry knew it the day before New Years Eve arrived and it was time for him to leave for Bradford.

"Oh love it's been so wonderful having you home for a bit. We missed you so so much."

"I missed you all too Mum."

"Even with all your new fancy rich friends." Gemma joked. 

"Not everyone is like that Gemma alright, there's actually some really lovely people there."

"Alright alright baby Styles don't get your knickers in a twist I was only teasing. Now give me a hug." Gemma pulled him into a hug giving Harry very little choice in the matter. "Sorry. I didn't mean to piss you off."

"I know, it's just Niall and the boys are great and they've really made my first term at Oxford better than I ever imagined it could be so it kinda feels like you're taking the piss out of them a bit."

"Alright, I feel proper guilty now."

So you should thought Harry. "Doesn't matter. Have fun in Manchester tomorrow and I'll give you a call when I get back to Oxford. Love you Gem."

"Love you too Haz."

Gemma let go only for Harry to be swept into his Mums arms. "Take care love, we'll see you at Easter and remember if you need anything just let us know"

"Will do Mum."

"Like your mum said H, anything just give us a shout."

"Thanks Robin."

"Now are you sure you'll be alright on the train to Bradford on your own, and your friends are going to be there to pick you up right?"

"Mum I'm eighteen not eight I think I can manage to get the train on my own." Harry laughed.

"That may well be Harry, but you'll always be my baby and I worry." Anne said.

"I'll text when I'm there just to let you know I've arrived safely."

"Thanks darling, now off you pop otherwise you'll miss your train."

"You'll have to let go of me first then mum." Harry laughed. 

"Sorry." Anne let go of Harry and gently herded him out of the door to the waiting taxi. "Bye love."

"Bye Mum, bye Robin, bye Gem. See you all next year!!" Harry got in the car and waved out the window until they were just specks in the distance, before picking up the phone and texting Zayn. 'On my way to the station, see you soon.'

****************

 

Zayn wasn't sure who was more excited about Harry coming for New Year, himself or the rest of his family. His sisters and his Mum had talked about it non-stop over the past week. His Dad had been his usual laid back self about it all, simply saying that if Harry made Zayn happy then he was happy. "Mum I'm leaving now for the station to get Harry."

"Do you want us to come with you? I can go and get your sisters up."

"Absolutely not. " Zayn said, horrified at the thought of his whole family turning up at the station with him. "I don't want to frighten Harry off by bringing you all with me."

"Alright calm down love, we shall all just wait patiently here for you to get back. I'll have the baby photo albums out all ready." Zayn's mum said before laughing at the look of horror that appeared on Zayn's face. "I'm teasing sunshine, we'll at least wait until he's settled in before inflicting those on him."

"Mum." Zayn whined, before Trisha enveloped him in a hug.

"I know he's special love, we won't mess this up for you I promise. We'll be on our best behaviour."

"Thanks Mum." Zayn pulled out of her embrace and picked his car keys up. "I shouldn't be too long, do you think you can put the kettle on ready for some tea when we get back?"

"Ooh shall I get the best china out?"

"Mum!"

"Sorry love. Standard mugs it is. Love you."

"Love you too, see you soon." Zayn kissed his mum on the cheek and made his way down the driveway to his car. He got in and set off to pick up Harry. As much as Zayn was excited, he was also nervous. His family was wealthy, and so their house and grounds were a reflection of that. He didn't want Harry to freak out when he saw it, or get even more nervous about meeting his family than he knew Harry already was. 

Despite the fact Zayn came from money, his parents had always tried their best to keep his feet on the ground. There had of course been times when Zayn was a teenager that he had pushed his parents to their limits, he wasn't perfect. The realisation that he could fuck up the rest of his life by not knuckling down to study, quickly changed his ways. Zayn still got up to plenty of mischief with Louis and Niall, but not enough to get into serious trouble. 

Zayn wondered what Harry had been like in school. He imagined he was popular, you couldn't help but like him, he had way of talking to you that felt like you were the most important person in the room. He reckoned Harry would have been quite the heartbreaker especially with those curls and dimples. 

There wasn't much traffic on the road this morning, lots of people were still not back to work yet and so the drive to the station was relatively quick. Zayn could feel his heart racing at the thought of finally seeing Harry again. It had only been about a week, but he had missed him terribly, phone calls and text just weren't the same. Zayn pulled into the station and managed to snag the last parking space. He checked his phone to see Harry had already arrived and was waiting for him. Zayn took a deep breath and rested his head on the steering wheel trying to compose himself so Harry wouldn't see what a wreck he was at the thought of seeing him again. "Ok you can do this, it's just Harry, don't get too overexcited, act casual, it's only been a week, no big deal. Breathe in, breathe out." Zayn suddenly let out a loud scream as a hand rapped firmly on the car window.

"Did you just scream?" said an all too familiar voice.

"No." Zayn said, not lifting his head from the wheel.

"Zayn why aren't you looking at me, are you alright?" Harry said with concern.

"Fine, bit embarrassed at my small yelp." Way to play it cool thought Zayn.

"Loud scream." Harry said with a huge smirk on his face that Zayn still couldn't see.

"Loud yelp maybe." 

"Whatever it was it was super cute."

"You think I'm cute?"

"I think you're wonderful."

Zayn opened one eye and peeked at Harry. "Hi." Zayn said shyly.

"Hi you massive idiot. Are you going to let me in?"

Zayn finally lifted his head up and fully looked at Harry. It seemed like Harry had got more beautiful in the week they had been apart. He opened the door, got out and pulled Harry into a bone crushing hug. "I missed you so much babe, like you have no idea."

"Zayn you're squeezing too tight love, I can't breathe properly." Harry said spluttering slightly.

"Oh my god I'm so sorry." Zayn hastily let Harry go and began gently touching his arms and face to make sure he hadn't hurt him. "Are you alright, I didn't hurt you did I?"

Harry grabbed Zayn's hands to still him. "Zayn are you alright?"

"Sorry, fuck I'm such a mess."

"Has something happened?" Harry said, voice laced with concern.

"No no, I'm alright, promise......I think I'm just a bit overwhelmed at seeing you if I'm honest."

"Zayn it's only been a week." Harry said fondly.

"I know, god this is more embarrassing than my scream."

"Thought it was a yelp." Harry teased.

"You must think I'm a right dick."

"Never." Harry pulled Zayn back into him and placed a gentle kiss on his lips. "I want to kiss you a fuck lot more, but if I start I won't be able to stop so I figure I can restrain myself till we get back to yours." 

"You look beautiful." Zayn said, only now taking in all of Harry. He had on Zayn's favourite green headscarf, a black tshirt showing off his tattoos, and his usual skinny jeans and boots.

Harry blushed at Zayn's words. "You do." Harry said looking intensely at Zayn. It amazed Harry that Zayn could look so effortlessly beautiful. He was wearing black skinny jeans with paint stains all over them, and a white tshirt dipped low enough so Harry caught a glimpse of his collarbones and tattoos. H couldn't help reaching out and running a finger softly over Z's collarbones. "Mine." Harry said.

"All yours."

"Did you wear that tshirt on purpose?"

"Might have." Zayn said with a smirk on his face.

"And you think I'm the menace. Missed you Zayn."

"So do you think you're ready to go meet my family?"

"Not really." Harry said looking down at the ground and scuffing his boots.

"I promise they're not scary Harry, they're relatively normal. I should warn you they are a bit over excited to meet you."

"I'm excited to meet them too, especially your sisters. I'm a little nervous too though."

"They'll love you just like I do." Zayn said smiling at Harry. He felt his heart beat faster when Harry's dimples popped out.

"Ok let's go then."

The journey back to Zayn's house flew by. Harry was so nervous, Zayn had to put one hand on Harry's thigh to calm him every time they stopped at a traffic light. "It'll be alright babe."

"I know, I just want to get there now."

"We're almost there, it's down the next lane." Zayn could feel the butterflies in his stomach as they drew closer to the double fronted high gates. "Right so, this is us."

Harry's jaw dropped at the sight of the big gates. "Are you joking? Is this like the Blenheim Palace thing again? You can't fool me twice Zayn." Harry said more in hope than belief.

Zayn turned off the engine, sighed and turned to Harry. "I'm not joking Harry, this is where I live. "

"Oh." Harry looked down at the floor of the car, he felt sick. Zayn's house looked huge, well what he could see because a lot was hidden by the biggest gates Harry had ever seen in his life. 

Zayn knew this would happen, because nothing in his life ever went right when it came to relationships. Maybe he should have been more sensitive to how Harry felt about the money side of things, but Zayn was so wrapped up in the possibility of Harry meeting his family that he'd obviously not properly considered how freaked out Harry might be by it all. Zayn swallowed down the lump in his throat and turned the engine back on.


	19. Chapter 19

Zayn put the car into reverse and began driving back down the lane.

"Where are we going? I don't understand, is this not your house after all?" Harry said, now totally confused.

"It is, but I figured....Harry you look really uncomfortable. I thought you might want to go back home." Zayn said sadly. 

"You're sending me away??" Harry said in a small voice. 

Zayn slammed on the brakes and switched the car off again. "Fuck Harry of course I'm not sending you away. I want you to stay with me and meet my family, but I also don't want you to feel scared or in any way uncomfortable."

"I'm scared of meeting your family and your fancy arse house but I'm not scared to be with you. You just might need to hold my hand for a bit." Harry said smiling at Zayn. 

"I think I can mange that. Harry the house is only bricks and mortar and I know that's easy for me to say, but the people who live in it are good and kind and they're ready to welcome you with open arms, if you'll let them? Will you?" Zayn said hopefully. 

Harry took Zayn's hand and squeezed. "I'll give it a try."

Zayn started the engine again and drove forward towards his house. They pulled up to the gate, Zayn got out and keyed in a code and the gates slowly opened. Harry still couldn't see the house properly because there was huge driveway to negotiate first. Zayn got back in and turned to Harry. "Ready babe?"

"Not really, but let's go."

Zayn pulled onto the driveway and they slowly inched their way towards the house. The closer they got the more Harry seemed to sink into his seat. "Fuck Zayn." They pulled up to the front of the house and Harry's eyes looked like they were going to pop out of his head. 

"I know it looks intimidating from the outside, but it's not all like that inside."

"Yeah ok."

Zayn got out of the car and Harry never moved. Zayn walked round to the passenger side opened the door for Harry. He leant in and took Harry's hand. "Let's go babe." Harry allowed Zayn to pull him out of the car before nestling in close to his body. "I won't let go of your hand." Zayn whispered. 

"They're just your family, if they're anything like you they must be amazing. I just have to keep telling myself that."

"You've spoken to my sisters before as well remember, they won't give you a hard time."

"I know, but it's different meeting them in person." 

"You're right, but if we don't go in now they're going to come outside in about two minutes. I've already seen the curtains twitching."

"Fuck. Right. Ok. Let's do this." Harry gripped onto Zayn's hand tightly. 

"Babe I love you, but you're about thirty seconds away from breaking my fingers and if they're broken then I can't use   
them if you get my drift." Zayn said cheekily before throwing a wink at Harry's shocked face. 

"Zayn!" Harry squealed before easing up on Zayn's hand. "You can't fucking talk about fingering me before I'm about to meet your family."

"I thought it would loosen you up in more ways than one." Zayn said before bursting out laughing. 

"Zayn, stop it." Harry whined. "Now all I can think about is your fingers and what you can do with them."

"Stopped you thinking about meeting my family for a few minutes though." Zayn said smugly.

"Yes I'll give you that. Although now I thinking about how I'm going to have to meet them with a rock hard cock."

"Harry!" Zayn was the one to whine this time. "I can't be thinking about your cock before I introduce you to my family."

"Well you started it."

"Right let's think about something not sexy."

"Erm Louis and Liam in bed because that's just wrong." Zayn said. 

"I thought you said think about something not sexy." Harry said with a sly grin on his face. 

"Oh you cheeky little fucker." Zayn said before hip checking him. 

"I'm joking, I'm joking." Harry giggled. 

"You're lucky I love you."

"I know."

"Now we should really go inside." Before they could go anyway Zayn's phone vibrated. "Huh it's Don." Zayn opened the text and started laughing. "She's such a idiot. Look." Zayn showed Harry his phone. 

'Hurry up and get inside you dick, we want to meet Harry and Mum is about thirty seconds away from running out and dragging you both in'. 

"Guess that's our cue to go in then." They both took deep breaths and walked towards the front door.


	20. Chapter 20

Zayn's family were amazing. Harry couldn't believe he was ever nervous about meeting them. His sisters were adorable and Safaa couldn't get enough of Harry's curls just like her brother. She was even planning on braiding his hair before dinner. Apparently Zayn also had secret braiding skills which Harry was planning on taking advantage of as soon as they got home to Oxford. 

Doniya was slightly scary, but only in the way all older sisters are when it comes to their younger brothers. A sort of 'fuck with my brother and I'll fuck you over vibe' but still perfectly lovely to him. She reminded him of Gemma like that, and then Harry wondered what Gemma would think of Zayn until he rid the thought from his mind because it wouldn't be happening anytime soon. 

Waliyha was the quietest out of Zayn's siblings, but she was really sweet and kind to him.

Zayn's Dad Yaser was really laid back and so chill it was brilliant. Then there was Zayn's mum. "Oh do call me Trisha love." She reminded Harry of his own mum. Welcoming, kind, and approachable. She pulled Harry into a hug as soon as Zayn introduced him and she'd stayed close by his side ever since, trying her utmost to make Harry feel at ease and for that he was thankful. They were all currently sitting in the lounge. Sorry the huge fucking Lounge which was about the same size as the whole top floor of Harry's house. Trisha had made tea for everyone and they were all now getting to know each other, well getting to know Harry.

"So Harry, Zayn tells me you're studying Law, how have you found your first term?"

"I've really enjoyed it so far. Zayn and the boys have really helped me settle in."

"You're sharing with Niall is that right?"

"Yeah he's been brilliant. He knows everyone and he helped me get a job too so I owe him a lot. If it wasn't for Niall I wouldn't have met Zayn."

"I don't know love, call me an old romantic but I think if two people are meant to be together they'll always find each other regardless. If the way Zayn talks about you is anything to go by then you're meant to be together."

"Oh for goodness sake mum, are you trying to destroy my cool reputation." Zayn said with a straight face which promptly dropped when his entire family started laughing. "Whatever."

"Sorry love I'll stop embarrassing you now. Harry how do you find working and studying, are you keeping up alright?"

"I've actually got two jobs Trisha so it's a bit difficult, but Zayn and the boys help me out they make sure I get a good meal inside me."

"I bet that's not all Zayn helps get inside you." Doniya said under her breath. 

Trisha side eyed her before seamlessly carrying on the conversation. "They're good boys. Your parents must be very proud of you Harry, it's not easy to get a scholarship let alone one to Oxford. Zayn couldn't stop talking about this brilliantly clever boy he'd met there."

"Really?"

"Yeah a couple of weeks after term had started you were all he could talk about." Trisha beamed at Harry and Zayn.

Harry couldn't help the smile on his own face, and Zayn just put his head in his hands overcome with mortification. 

"Mother, seriously!"

"What? I didn't do anything." Trisha said trying to keep a straight face. 

"I'm going to give Harry a tour of the house and the grounds and get him all settled in. We'll be back around dinner time."

"Alright sunshine. Harry it was a pleasure to meet you and we all look forward to dinner this evening. I've got Zayn's baby photos all ready for you."

"No way!! Baby Zayn pictures!! Oh my god I bet you were the cutest!" Harry said clapping his hands with glee.

"Right and that is definitely our cue to leave." Zayn stood up pulling Harry with him.

"Bye lovebirds." Trisha said before the rest of Zayn's family and Harry erupted in laughter. 

"Ugh, stop encouraging them Harry." Zayn said.

"Sorry love." Harry said before brushing his hand down Zayn's arms.

"Oh he called him love." Trisha practically squealed. "You are both the cutest."

"Mum you are so embarrassing." Zayn moaned.

"Zayn Malik. Harry is the first boy you've ever brought home so let me revel in it and stop being selfish." Trisha said sternly.

"Sorry Mum." Zayn said looking down at the ground, before Harry squeezed his hand. Zayn looked back up at his mum. "Can we go now, please?"

"Yes sunshine, and Harry please do ignore me I get a bit over excited."

"It's alright Trisha, that happens to Zayn sometimes." It took a few seconds for Harry to realise what he said. "No wait, i didn't mean it like that, oh my god, it so wasn't a sex thing I promise, I mean we have......." 

"Enough babe." Zayn said gently placing a hand over Harry's mouth. "We're going."

Zayn and Harry backed out of the room with Harry muttering quiet apologies to both Zayn and his Mum. It was only when they were back in the hall that Harry started laughing and buried his face in Zayn's neck. "I'm so embarrassed."

"You're embarrassed, I'm the one who is going to have baby pictures of me brandished about later."

"Brandished? Look at you with your fancy Oxford words."

"Get you hot does it."

"Anything you do gets me hot Zayn."

Zayn pulled Harry a bit closer to him and grabbed his arse. "Yeah?"

"Zayn your whole family is in the next room, unhand me you scoundrel. I won't let you sully my virtue.....well at least not in the middle of the hallway." Zayn reluctantly let go of Harry's arse and took his hand instead, before picking up Harry's overnight bag.

"Perfect gentleman."

"I'm carrying your bag Harry, not you over the threshold." Zayn joked.

"Realistically I'd be carrying you over the threshold, you've not got the arms." Harry said.

Zayn dropped Harry's bag on the floor. "Really, you reckon?" Before Zayn could stop him Harry had lifted him off his feet so Zayn had no choice but to wrap his legs around Harry's waist. "Oh."

"Imagine me pressing you up against the wall like this yeah?"

"Fuck Harry, seriously you have to put me down now." Zayn said, feeling his skin heating up.

"Can I kiss you first?"

"Make it quick before anyone comes out." 

Zayn slowly slid his legs down until he was able to stand, before Harry pulled him closer.

"Zayn heads up, your Mum is currently watching you on the security camera." Zayn's dad shouted.

"For fucks sake. MUM!!!!"

"Sorry love. I've switched it off."

Zayn picks up Harry's bag and once again takes his hand. "Remind me why I wanted you to meet my family?"

"Because you love me, you want to kiss me." Harry sang.

"Idiot."

"Your idiot." Harry said.

"Always. Right let's crack on with the tour."

"Yeah it'll probably take you the whole day to show me around." Harry said.

"Oh quite the wit aren't you."

"I have my moments. So where to first?" Harry said still clutching on to Zayn's hand.

"Well you've seen the front room and then the door that leads off it takes you to the dining room, where Mum and Dad entertain guests if they have them. I barely go in there so I'll show you it later. Through here is the kitchen." Zayn took Harry into the kitchen, which was a bit smaller than the front room. There was every possible appliance you could imagine. 

"Oh my god you have a KitchenAid, can I use it? I make the best cupcakes, like seriously Zayn, but I've never been able to afford one. Your kitchen is like porn. I'm so turned on right now." Harry said, before pressing himself up against Zayn's back.

"Fuck Harry, I'd have shown you my kitchen ages ago if I knew that was all it took. If you want, we can make cupcakes tomorrow for the party. I say we, I mean you and I'll help."

Harry's eyes lit up. "Really? Your mum would let me use her kitchen?"

"Harry I think my mum would adopt you if she could, so using her KitchenAid will not be a problem."

"Thank you, thank you, thank you." Harry said before planting a big wet kiss on Zayn's cheek. "Love you."

"Love my kitchen more like." 

"That too."

"Come on I'll show you upstairs."

Harry and Zayn walked up the sweeping staircase. "Did you ever slide down the bannisters when you were little?"

"Only when my parents were at the opposite end of the house. My sisters and I used to time each other to see who was quickest. I loved growing up here." They reached the first floor and Zayn turned left. "Just down here is the Library."

"Are you fucking with me."

"No. My parents love books, it's why I love English. Come on, I'll show you."

Harry still wasn't convinced there was an actual library behind the door until Zayn opened it. "Fuck, you were serious. Zayn it's beautiful." There were books everywhere, on shelves, on the floor, on the chairs. Harry walked towards the books on the shelves and ran his fingers along them. He selected one and was pleasantly surprised to see it was obviously well read. 

Zayn laughed. "Try and contain your surprise babe, we're not one of those families who has a library but who never reads the books. Every book in here has been read by at least one of us. When I was little there was a time when I couldn't sleep very well, so I'd sneak in here with a torch and pick a book and just read. Mum lost count of the number of times she would find me asleep in one of the chairs. Books and art made me feel safe when I was a child."

Harry was constantly surprised by Zayn, he had so many layers to him and he looked forward to discovering them all.

"You're welcome to borrow any book you like in here, but you have to return it in person that's my mums only proviso."

"I think I can manage that. Means I get a chance to come visit you again." Harry said blushing.

"Harry you don't need to borrow a book to come visit, you're welcome here anytime." Zayn said smiling warmly.

"So where to next? We've had the lounge, the hall, the kitchen the library. Zayn do you live in a real life version of Cluedo? Because if you have a ballroom I think I might want to marry you." Harry said before darting out of Zayn's reach.

"No Harry, sadly there is no ballroom. Although if it's a deal breaker for marriage I'd build you one." Zayn said shyly.

Harry's heart began to beat wildly at the thought of being able to wake up every day next to Zayn. Then Harry thought about what his family might think about Zayn and he shut those thoughts down. "You might rethink that when you see me dance love. Take me to the next room."

"On this floor apart from the library we've got my parents bedroom, Saf's bedroom, and one spare bedroom. I won't show you those, and then there is also the bathroom as well which is just down here." Zayn led the way with Harry following. "This is the main bathroom." Zayn opened the door to reveal a room that was definitely bigger than Harry's lounge. 

"Zayn it's got a claw foot bathtub, and it's fucking massive like you could easily fit us both in there."

"That's a lovely offer babe, but I've got my own bathroom for that."

"You've got your own bathroom?"

"Yeah you'll see it in a minute. Come on next floor." Zayn and Harry walked up the next flight of stairs. "Ok so this is Doniya and "Waliyha's floor, they both have their own bedroom with ensuites, a separate bathroom, and a TV room that they share, but most of the time Doniya is out so Waliyha and her friends use it most of the time. There is also a spare bedroom for any of their friends to stay."

"A whole floor just for the two of them?"

"Yeah, and when Don moves out eventually then Saf will get her room."

This was a whole other world for Harry, he'd imagined Zayn's house but it wasn't anything like this. 

"Ok one more floor to go." Zayn led Harry up one more fight of stairs until they were at the top. "So technically this is the top floor, but you see the hatch in the ceiling if you pull it down it leads up to the attic and another spare room. Lou has slept in the attic more times than I can count. Ok erm...this is my floor."

"All for you?"

"I'm the only boy, if Don had been the only girl she would have got the whole floor to herself. I have a separate bathroom and then a games room with like a pool table, TV, DVD, etc, and then this is my bedroom." Zayn felt nervous about showing Harry his room, it was were he grew up, it contained everything that made him him and he didn't want Harry to be disappointed. Zayn opened the door with a flourish. "Ta da."

Harry stood in the doorway just looking before Zayn gave him a gentle push and he was finally inside. It was so different to Harry's bedroom, I mean the obvious thing being it was fucking massive. There were five skateboards propped up against the walk in wardrobe, all in various states of disrepair. 

"Lou is supposed to be fixing them for me, but he's a lazy fucker so I won't hold my breath." 

Harry walked round the room to see if he could reconcile the bedroom with the Zayn he knew. The bed was huge and Harry couldn't help blushing at the thought of sharing it with Zayn later. There were books all over the place, from Harry Potter to Shakespeare. There was a box of comics that Harry spotted peeking out from under Zayn's bed that he couldn't help smiling at. Album covers lined the walls, ranging from Pink Floyd to Tupac. One wall was just photos. Harry stood in front of the pictures tracing his fingers over Zayn as a baby to Zayn, Louis, and Niall at school, to..."Zayn?"

"Yes babe?"

Harry hadn't realised that Zayn was now standing behind him. Zayn's arms encircled Harry's waist as he rested his chin on Harry's shoulders. "How did you.....like why is this up here?" Harry brushed his fingers across the most recent photo that adorned Zayn's wall. It was a photo of Harry and Zayn on their first date at Blenheim Palace after they'd had their picnic and first proper kiss. Harry's lips were swollen, his hair a fucking state, Zayn's eyes were heavy lidded, and he looked blissed out. Both of them looked ecstatically happy. Harry had taken a selfie of them and sent it to Zayn later that night. It was the photo Harry had put in the centre of his Christmas present to Zayn.

"After you sent me the picture I emailed it to Don, she got it printed out and then pinned it on the wall for me." 

"I bet Doniya wondered why you were sending her a picture of a strange boy."

"Not really, she already knew all about you."

"But, that was our first date." Harry tried to turn round in Zayn's arms but Zayn held him in place. 

"I told her about you the night after we first met. I phoned her and told her all about a boy with green eyes, curls and dimples who was going to ruin me. So when I sent her the picture it wasn't a surprise."

"I would never ruin you Zayn." Harry said earnestly. "Well only in the best possible way." Harry murmured before arching back into Zayn. "I love that you put the photo on your wall."

"The wall is photos of the people I love most. My family, my friends, and you." 

This time Zayn let Harry squirm about till they were finally facing each other. "Why are you so perfect?"

Zayn laughed. "I'm far from that."

"To me you are." Harry leant in and let his lips brush Zayn's cheek. "Like you."

"Like you more babe."

"I have one more room to show you."

"More rooms!"

"I mean I've still got the grounds to show you, but I can do that later. This room is special, only I have the key."

"Zayn, do you have a sex dungeon in your parents house."

"You wish I had a sex dungeon, you cheeky fucker."

"Reasonable assumption, room in your house and only you have the key."

"It's not a sex dungeon, and anything I show you now is never going to live up to that."

"Is the room special to you?" Harry asked.

"Very."

"Then it'll more than live up to it."

"Follow me then." Zayn took Harry's hand again and pulled him inside the wardrobe. Harry looked puzzled as Zayn pushed his clothes back to reveal a hidden door.

"Holy shit, it's like the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. Oh my god does this take us to Narnia, are we going to meet Mr Tumnus. I always though James McAvoy looked hot as a fawn."

"You have the strangest ideas." Zayn said before smiling fondly at Harry. "I can't promise Narnia I'm afraid."

"No sex dungeon and no Narnia, well this day is just one disappointment after another." Harry joked. "Come on then show me what's behind the door."

Zayn pulled the key out of his pocket before waving it in Harry's face,

"Ooh the suspense is building" Harry said dancing around the wardrobe.

Zayn took a deep breath, unlocked the door and held it open for Harry. "After you babe."

Harry walked through the doorway and immediately stopped. He looked around the space in awe before turning back to Zayn. "Is this your art studio?"

"Yeah it is." Zayn whispered before looking down at the floor. Harry walked in and wandered round, this time not touching anything. One wall was covered in graffiti, another with what looked like comic book sketches, the other two walls were currently blank with pots of white paint beside them. There were canvases stacked up against the wall, some blank, others with portraits and the most beautiful landscapes Harry had seen up close. There was a table with sketches on in pencil and reams of tracing paper with what looked like tattoo designs on. "Are they tattoo designs?"

"I like to design my own sometimes. In another life I think I would have been a tattoo artist."

"Have you ever tattooed anyone before?"

"Only Lou."

Harry felt a twinge of jealousy shoot through him, even though he knew it was irrational he couldn't help it. "Would you design something for me?"

"What?"

"Like would you design something just for me, so I could get it tattooed."

"You'd get a tattoo of something I designed?"

"Well ideally I'd like you to do the tattoo, but I figure you might not be up for that so this is the next best thing." 

"How about I draw you a design for a proper tattoo at a parlour and then if you want maybe tomorrow I could give you a small tattoo."

"Seriously?" Harry said excitedly.

"One of Louis' friends who is coming tomorrow, his girlfriend is a tattoo artist and she can bring her kit for us to borrow."

"Best New Years ever." Harry beamed at Zayn. "I wanted to say thank you Zayn. It really means a lot that you would even consider showing me this room."

"This is a huge part of who I am and I wanted you to know that. Behind my big fancy house this is me."

"I know there's more to you than your house Zayn."

"Sometimes I let people in too easily, and I've been hurt quite badly because I rush in or see things that aren't really there. This studio, this little part of me has only been seen by my family and Louis. No-one else. Until you. I'm trying really hard not to freak you out right now, because we've not been together that long." Zayn said the nerves apparent in his voice. 

"Hey, you're not freaking me out. I'm all in, whatever we're doing I'm in."

"Really?"

"Zayn I love you and you love me. It's as simple as that. Now, are you going to paint me like one of your French girls."

"Titanic. Seriously?" 

"Oh just shut up and draw me." Harry said before pulling his tshirt over his head. 

Zayn backed away. "I can't.....like.....it's too much....you're too much for me to draw, I wouldn't be able to concentrate, I can't look at you without....well....you know." Zayn said before biting biting his bottom lip nervously.

Harry moved steadily towards Zayn. "I didn't realise I made you so nervous love." Harry continued walking, forcing Zayn backwards until he was pressed up against one of the blank walls. "I like your tattoo idea, maybe we can spend the afternoon doing that, you could lay me out, decide where you'd like it to go, map every inch of me until you were satisfied you'd found the right place." Harry reached out and let his thumb run slowly over Zayn's bottom lip. "Would you like that?"

"Yeah." Zayn managed to get out.

"You could mark me up in the places you'd like to put one. You've been promising me for ages we could do that."

At this point Harry wasn't even touching Zayn, he was crowding him and up in his space, and Zayn had never been so hard without anyone touching him.

"I want that so much." Zayn said, his breath thready as Harry slowly ran his fingers down Zayn's arms.

"Maybe tonight after dinner you could do that, I'm a bit worried your whole family is going to burst on in us at any minute." Harry laughed, backing away to let Zayn calm down.

"I'll hold you to that." Zayn said. "Now how about I show you the rest of the grounds?"

"There's more?"

"Whole of the grounds still to go. Ready?"

"Quicker we see the grounds, quicker it'll be till dinner." Harry winked.


	21. Chapter 21

After Zayn had finished showing Harry his bedroom and studio he gave him a tour of the outside. There was a swimming pool with a lovely pool house with a huge bed, mini fridge, games both board and consoles, it was amazing. "The hours Lou and I used to spend in here when we were little, and then Niall when he arrived. We'd spend most of our summers here because I'm not keen on flying so I didn't really fancy going away far. Lou's sisters would join him sometimes for a couple of weeks. Sometimes I'd go to Lou's or Niall's. It was the best time."

Harry laughed. "My recent summers were spent working at the bakery to save up for Uni or studying hard so I could gets scholarship. A little bit different from yours. I'm glad I did though because I'd never have met you if I hadn't have come to Oxford."

Zayn took Harry's hand in his, brought it up to his lips and kissed his palm. "Come on, Mum is making dinner so we're laying the table."

"Race you back." Harry shouted before taking off for the house. 

"Not fair you had a head start Styles."

"Snooze you lose Malik." Harry shouted as he looked back towards Zayn before turning around and falling straight into a bush."

"Oh my god Harry." Zayn yelled before running to the bush and pulling Harry out. "Fuck are you alright, you're not hurt are you??"

"Does embarrassment count as hurt?" Harry said as he tried to pull the leaves out of his hair. 

"Hey nothing to be embarrassed about babe." Zayn said as he helped Harry with the leaves. He suddenly stopped and smiled. 

"What? God how many fucking leaves are in my hair."

"You're beautiful. You pretty much look like the definition of being dragged through a hedge backwards with leaves and bracken in your hair, and yet you look fucking incredible."

"No you do." 

"No you."

"We could go back and forth like this all night and neither of us is going to give in. Let's go help your mum because quite honestly the quicker dinner is over, the quicker I can get you back upstairs love." Harry said, dipping his voice low like he knew Zayn liked.

"Yeah?"

"Want you so bad Zayn." Harry took a few quick glances around him before moving closer to Zayn. "Always want you." Harry said before gently running his fingers up and down Zayn's arm. "Tonight is going to be more than worth the wait, promise." Harry leant in closer until his lips were brushing Zayn's cheek. "Can we be loud Zayn?" Harry whispered into Zayn's ear.

"Erm......fuck Harry....so Don and Waliyha are staying with my Aunt tonight so they won't be home. We've got like a clear floor between us."

"Will that be enough do you think? For you? You know I get loud, but I want to see how loud I can make you get." Harry pulled Zayn's tshirt down slightly and began sucking a love bite into his perfect collar bone. After Harry finished he looked up to see Zayn's eyes had gone black. "Like the idea of being loud for me? Making you scream? Making you say my name over and over? Sound good love?"

Zayn grabbed Harry's hand and pulled him back towards the pool house. As soon as they were inside Zayn pushed Harry up against the wall. "Do you like teasing me Harry?" Zayn said as he crowded into Harry's space without touching him. "Like riling me up, making me all hot and bothered, making me want to fuck you right there in my garden? That get you hot babe?"

"Fuck Zayn." Harry's breath hitched. He was getting hard and Zayn wasn't even touching him. "Please."

"Alway so polite babe. Will you still be that polite tonight when I'm touching you, kissing you, sucking you?" 

"Now, want you now, can't wait." Harry pleaded. 

"Anyone could walk in Harry, the door is wide open. If someone walked out into the garden they'd be able to see us. Would you like that?? Me down on my knees, sucking your cock, door wide open?" 

"I don't care, I don't care, please." Harry wasn't above begging.

"I've got a better idea for now."

"Anything Zayn."

"If I can make you come completely untouched, then you can fuck me tonight." Zayn stepped away from Harry who whined.

"Zaaayyyynnnn." 

Zayn just stood there, absolutely confident that he could do this. They'd never really talked details about what was going to happen tonight and as much as Zayn wanted to fuck Harry, he'd also seen Harry's cock and he wanted it in him as soon as possible. "Is that a yes?" 

Harry's skin felt like it was on fire. The thought of fucking Zayn was almost too much for him. He took a couple of deep breaths and closed his eyes for a few seconds. When he opened them Zayn was standing there. He was beautiful and in a few hours he was going to be inside of him, and fuck if that didn't make his cock harder. Harry nodded. 

"Need you to say the word babe." 

"Yes."

"Unbutton your jeans and pull them down. I want to see how hard you already are."

Harry's fingers fumbled as he hastily unbuttoned his jeans before easing then down his thighs. 

"Fuck Harry. No underwear." Zayn said as he just gazed at Harry's already hard cock. 

"Wanted to be ready for you, just in case." Harry muttered as his hands twitched by his sides. 

"You have no idea how hot that is." Zayn moved forward and placed his hands either side of Harry's face. He leant forward so his lips were millimetres away from Harry's, somehow managing to avoid even brushing Harry's cock. 

"I love kissing you Harry. I've never kissed anyone the way I kiss you. At first I thought it was just because of your lips, because I mean lets be honest they're pretty spectacular. Made for kissing they're so red and plump, it's an underused word but that's what they are. Plump. Full. Luscious. But, it's not just that, you know how to use them. Sometimes slow and sensual, like we could spend a whole night kissing and never once get bored. Other times so hard it feels like my lips are bruised when we've finished. They're so swollen they look like yours." 

Zayn pulls back slightly and stares at Harry intently. Harry's pupils are so dilated his eyes look black, his mouth is open slightly as if he wants Zayn to lean in and kiss him even though Harry knows he won't. Zayn runs his tongue along his bottom lip all the while staring into Harry's eyes. "Your tongue babe. Fuck it's amazing. Always wanting the upper hand, but not afraid to let go. It's like you're fucking my mouth with your tongue." 

Zayn risked a glance down at Harry's cock. It was bright red and he could see the pre come leaking out. "Always so wet. I don't know how you manage it, do you?"

Harry shakes his head trying to maintain his composure but failing miserably. 

"I need that tongue tonight Harry. Want your kisses, want you to mark me up so everyone at the party will know I'm yours." Zayn could see Harry was on the edge. "Then I want you to lick me out, fuck me with your tongue till I'm so wet you can push your cock right in. I'll even let you gag me if I'm too loud."

Harry mewled and took a breath. His heart was like a jackhammer in his chest. "Almost there Zayn. Please."

"Once you're in I don't want you to stop. I want you to hit my spot every time. Fuck me hard till all I can say is your name. Then slow down and watch me fall apart until I come with your name on my lips. Harry." 

That was enough for Harry. He cried out Zayn's name before coming untouched. His legs gave way and he slid to the floor, Zayn managing to catch Harry before he hurt himself. "Zayn. Fuck. I can't...." Harry buried his head in Zayn's neck and took long deep breaths until he felt his heart beating at a steady rate. 

"Are you alright babe?"

"Yeah, just sticky." Harry giggled. 

"Think you'll be alright for a minute while I go get something to clean you up?"

"Only a minute though." Harry said needily. 

Zayn eased Harry out of his arms so he was sat against the wall. He hastily made his way to the bathroom and grabbed   
a flannel and some tissues. He made his way back into the room and grabbed a bottle of water and a pair of old trackies for Harry as he was passing the kitchen area of the pool house. 

"There you go babe, drink this." Zayn said passing the bottle to Harry. "I'll get you out of these jeans and you can put these old trackies on." Zayn managed to get Harry's skinny jeans off with a bit of effort before turning his attention to Harry's stomach which still had drying come on it. Before he used the flannel he swiped his finger through the come and sucked it into his mouth. "Love how you taste." Zayn couldn't help but smile as Harry's cock began to twitch. He reluctantly wiped away the rest of the come before kissing Harry once more. They eventually pulled away from each other and Harry put Zayn's old clothes on. 

"Zayn, do you like.... Erm... Want me to take care of you??" Harry said as he glanced down at Zayn's still obviously hard cock. 

"Nah babe you're alright, take care of it for me later." Zayn said. "I like the anticipation."

"Are you sure?" Harry asked.

"Positive. Now do you think your legs are steady enough to walk to the house to help Mum get ready for dinner? I mean I pretty much just rocked your world, so I understand if you need a minute or two to recover." Zayn said, with a huge smirk on your face.

"Look at you, all pleased with yourself." Harry laughed. "I think I can manage to walk to the house, but maybe for my own safety and to avoid any bushes you should hold me hand."

"I think that can be arranged." Zayn said as he took Harry's hand in his. "Ready?"

"Yep let's go lay a table, and then after dinner I can lay you."

Zayn burst out laughing. "That sentence was ridiculous Styles, but I can get behind the sentiment."

"A bit like how I'll be getting behind you later." Harry said laughing.

"No. Stop. Enough, or else I'll have to gag you."

"Don't think so, I'll be the one gagging you later when you're shouting my name love." Harry reached down with his right hand and squeezed the outline of Zayn's hard cock through his jeans for a few seconds before letting go. "So hard already. All for me."

"Fuck. Right we have to go back now and sort the table out before my mum comes looking for us." Zayn pulled his tshirt down so it was covering his hard cock. "Do I look presentable?"

"For now." Harry pulled Zayn out of the pool house and they began walking back to the main house."Dinner will be what? A couple of hours at most? Hope you can make it through love." Harry smirked before opening Zayn's front door.

"What? Harry what does that mean?" Zayn said, not enjoying the cheeky look on Harry's face.

"Wait and see Zayn, wait and see." Harry said before rushing through to the kitchen to see Trisha.

Zayn adjusted the bulge in his jeans and followed Harry. "I'm fucked."


	22. Chapter 22

Zayn realised what a mistake he'd made as soon as they got inside the house. Trisha had tasked Zayn and Harry with laying the dinner table whilst she got on with making the actual food. Yaser and Saf weren't home yet so it was just Zayn and Harry alone in the dining room. Every time Zayn laid down a knife and fork he found Harry behind him pressing him into the table and rubbing up against him. "Fuck Harry. Seriously you have to stop."

"Hey you were the one who said 'nah babe, take care of it for me later'" Harry said, in a near imitation of Zayn's Bradford accent. 

"By later I meant tonight, not fifteen minutes later when we're in the dining room."

"As an English student Zayn, maybe you should learn to be more specific with your words then." Harry leant in closer and placed a gentle kiss on Zayn's neck before pulling away and giving Zayn some relief. 

"Smart Arse." Zayn said with fondness. "Also was that supposed to be an impression of me before?"

"Not bad am I?"

"You're alright."

"I need to work on poshing it up a bit to get you exactly right."

"Poshing it up? As an English student I should point out that....." Zayn couldn't finish his sentence as Harry's lips brushed his. Zayn melted into Harry's mouth before the sound of his mums discreet coughing broke them apart. 

"Wondered what was taking you boys so long." 

"Sorry Trisha."

"No apologies necessary love, you make my Zayn happy so a bit of kissing is fine by me." Trisha said with a smile on her face. Harry couldn't help blushing. 

"I'm not going to embarrass you anymore. Your dad and sister are pulling up and dinner will be in about ten minutes." Trisha said as she left the room.

"You going to make it through dinner alright?" Harry smirked. 

"Menace. Keep your hands to yourself while we're at the table."

"Promise." Harry said his eyes sparkling with mischief. 

****************

Twenty minutes later everyone was sitting at the table tucking into dinner. Zayn didn't have to worry about Harry's hands because Trisha had sat them opposite each other. What Zayn forgot to take into consideration was the fact that Harry had long legs. At first he didn't mind playing footsie with Harry, but then Harry's foot gradually began making his way up Zayn's leg until it was firmly in his lap, and then he pressed down. Zayn choked on his food. 

"Sunshine are you alright??" Trisha said as she hit Zayn on the back. 

"Yep. All good. Just went down the wrong way." Zayn managed to splutter. 

"Do you want some water love?" Harry said, trying to keep the smug grin off his face. 

"No it's fine thanks Haz." Zayn said through gritted teeth as Harry began slowly moving his foot back down Zayn's leg. Harry could tease but he didn't want Zayn to feel too uncomfortable. 

"Are you ok to finish your dinner son?" Yaser said. 

Zayn glanced at Harry who subtly nodded. "Yeah I'll be ok now thanks." 

Harry rubbed his foot against Zayn's calf in apology and Zayn looked up and smiled. The rest of the dinner passed without incident. The obvious outcome being that everyone fell in love with Harry a little bit more, and Harry fell in love with Zayn's family. Zayn could't wait for tomorrow when he could hang out with them all. Trisha and Yaser let Zayn and Harry skip out on the clearing up which was a relief for them both. They said their good nights and left the dining room. Zayn and Harry pretty much ran up the stairs to Zayn's bedroom. Harry was through the door first, followed by Zayn a minute or so later. Harry lay down on the bed and bit his bottom lip. It took Zayn about five seconds to straddle Harry. 

"Hey you."

"Hey love. What took you so long."

"You've got longer legs than me babe, no wonder you can run faster." 

"Wait until they're wrapped around you."

Zayn leant down and brushed his lips over Harry's. They stayed like that for a few moments, trading slow lazy kisses before Harry took the initiative and flipped them over so Zayn was underneath him. Harry carried on kissing Zayn before slowly moving to his neck and down to his perfect collarbones. He pressed his thumb into the bruise he'd made earlier in the pool house and watched as Zayn's breath hitched. 

"Fuck."

"Feel good love?"

"So good."

Harry pressed down harder as he felt Zayn's cock begin stiffening in his jeans. "Oh shit."

"So beautifully responsive Zayn. I've not even used my tongue on you yet." Harry sat back up and paused for a minute. "Wanna get you out of these clothes now. Can't mark you up if you're still in your tshirt."

Zayn's hands moved liked lightening as he had his tshirt off faster than Harry had seen before. "Fuck love, you must want my mouth really bad." 

"Please Harry." Zayn wasn't above begging if Harry didn't get his mouth on him in the next minute. 

Harry shuffled down Zayn's legs before bringing his mouth down to Zayn's stomach. He spent the next five minutes ravaging Zayn's skin so he was marked up everywhere. He never said a word, the only sound in the room being Zayn's whimpers and moans of pleasure. Finally Harry sat back up and admired his work. "You look beautiful love. I think I might lick you out now." Harry said, as if they were having a normal conversation. 

"Fuck's sake Harry." Zayn said as he began to try and get some friction on his hard cock.

"Let's get your jeans off love, need to get my tongue inside you." Harry laughed as Zayn whined. Harry slid off Zayn, unzipped his jeans and pulled them down along with his boxers. Zayn lay there totally naked, all tattoos, love bites and hard cock.

"Now you Harry, hardly seems fair I'm the only one with my clothes on." Zayn sat up and pulled Harry's tshirt over his head before leaning down and licking all four of Harry's nipples. 

"Shit Zayn, I forgot how good your tongue feels. If you want me to take my jeans off though you'll have to stop for a minute." 

Zayn pulled away and proceeded to skilfully squeeze Harry out of his skinny jeans. "I think I'm perfecting the art of this now." Harry laughed. Zayn wasn't laughing as he saw Harry's cock appear. "Fuck I want your cock in me Harry."

"Patience love, I've got to open you up with my tongue first. Think you can wait?"

"Yeah." Zayn lay back down and looked up at Harry hovering above him. He was stunning. Green eyes sparkling, the want apparent in his eyes and his hard cock.

Harry moved down towards the end of the bed and gently spread Zayn's legs open so his hole was fully on display. Zayn immediately put his arm over his face in embarrassment at being so open in front of Harry. 

"Hey love, no. Take your arm away, I can't see your beautiful face."

Zayn sighed and took his arm away. "Sorry it's just a lot."

Harry took one of Harry's hands and began stroking it. "We don't have to do anything you don't want to love, you know that right?"

"No I want to I really do. Just erm nobody has ever like.....used their tongue before."

"Oh. I don't have to if you'd rather not."

Zayn looked down at Harry and knew whiteout a shadow of doubt he wanted Harry to. "I've never really trusted anyone enough to do that. It aways felt like quite an intimate thing to me." 

Harry felt his heart beat faster and he smiled lovingly at Zayn. "I'm so pleased that you trust me enough love. If at any time you want me to stop just tell me and I'll stop straight away."

"I won't want to stop, but thank you babe." 

Harry let go of Zayn's hand and began gently rubbing his hands up and down Zayn's thighs. "Ready?"

"Yes." Zayn said, without hesitation. 

Harry moved back down the bed at bit and laid down between Zayn's legs. He slowly and methodically began to leave soft kisses up the inside of Zayn's thighs. He ignored Zayn's hard cock and hole for the moment, giving Zayn time to adjust. 

"Babe I'm ready now, want you to."

Harry didn't need telling twice, his mouth inched closer until he could see Zayn clutching the bed sheet in need. He gently placed closed mouth kisses to Zayn's pucker before opening his mouth and really going to work. He could feel Zayn squirming under him so he looked up to make sure he was alright. "All good?"

Zayn's eyes looked they were going to pop out of his head at the sight of Harry. His lips were swollen and glistening, his hair a state where Zayn's hands had been in them. He looked wrecked. "Yeah."

Harry nodded and continued his steady pace, he curled his tongue and began to push inside Zayn. 

"Fuck. Oh fuck. Harry. Don't stop don't stop."

Harry was relentless working Zayn over until he was whimpering. His tongue flicked in and out hitting his prostrate now and again in order to keep Zayn on edge until Zayn couldn't take anymore. 

"Harry enough, I'm going to come. Want you inside babe first."

"My tongues inside love, be specific."

"Don't be so pedantic."

"Fancy words make me hot Zayn."

"Your cock Harry. Fuck me with your cock." 

"Of course love. Might use my fingers first just to make sure you're stretched enough. Is that alright?" Harry asked. 

The thought of Harry's long fingers inside him almost pushed Zayn over the edge there and then. He took a deep breath and managed to calm himself. "Yes please."

"So polite, you must have been raised right. Let's see if you're so polite when I'm fucking into you."

"Harry. Babe. Seriously I'm not going to last much longer if you don't get in me."

Without any warning Harry slipped a finger inside. 

"Motherfucker." 

"Dirty mouth after all and that was only one finger." Harry chuckled. 

"Fuck you Styles."

Harry slipped another finger inside and slowly began to twist, before adding a third and opening Zayn right up. He pushed in and out for a few strokes and then stopped happy to watch as Zayn took over and began to fuck Harry's fingers. "Beautiful Zayn."

"Need your cock Harry. Need it now. Not going.....fuck...not going to last if you don't get in me."

"Alright love." Harry slid his fingers out of Zayn wiping them on the sheet and grabbing the condom and lube from the bedside table. Harry opened the lube and squirted some over his cock. He was pretty sure Zayn was wet enough but just in case. "Ready?"

"Yes babe."

Harry slid in as slow as he possibly could, wanting to prolong the moment for Zayn. 

"Fuck fuck fuck."

"You alright love, not too much?"

"No I'm good, it's all good. More."

Harry carried on his slow pace before bottoming out. "Fuck Zayn. So tight. Fuck. I honestly don't know how long I'm going to last." Harry took a few deep breaths and waited for Zayn.

"Move Harry. I need you to move."

Harry pulled out just as slow as he pulled in before slamming back inside Zayn.

"Fuck!!!! Oh my god, fuck so hot."

Harry began sliding in and out, much at the same pace as he had licked Zayn out. Sometimes slow, sometimes hard and fast, Zayn never knowing what was coming next. "Love I'm not going to last much longer, I'm so sorry."

"It's fine, it's fine, we're definitely doing this again so I don't care. Just want to come, can you make me come babe. Please Harry, please." Zayn began tugging on his cock, matching Harry's stroke so they were in perfect harmony. "Harder, I can take it. Fuck me."

Harry didn't need telling twice. He spread Zayn's legs wider and hitched one leg over his shoulder. "You're so perfect Zayn. Can't believe I get to do this. Fuck you into your mattress, make you scream. You're loud love, definitely going to have to get that gag for next time." Harry slowed down and began sliding in and out at a pace that felt exquisite to Zayn, hitting his prostrate every time. 

"I'm going to come, I'm going to come, Harry!!!" Zayn couldn't stop as he came hard and ropes of white cum shot over his stomach.

"Can I come inside love, or shall I pull out?"

Zayn felt sensitive, but not too sensitive that he didn't want Harry coming inside him even with a condom. "Inside, want to feel you come inside. You nearly there?" Zayn's leg slipped down and he wrapped them around Harry's waist instead pulling him in closer. "You're almost there baby. Come on. Like you."

"Fuck Zayn," That was enough for Harry and he came inside Zayn. He slumped down onto Zayn's body to catch his breath before slowly pulling out and rolling over next to him. 

"Harry, your cock is fucking ridiculous." Zayn laughed. "I've never come like that before, fuck."

"Why thank you." Harry said smugly. 

"I genuinely don't think I can walk for a minute, do you think you get a flannel from the bathroom?" Zayn asked.

"Course love." Harry got up and walked to Zayn;s bathroom, grabbed a flannel and walked back into the bedroom. Zayn's eyes didn't stop tracking Harry.

"You're so hot Harry, you're fucked out and it is such a good look on you." Zayn felt his cock twitch again.

Harry lay down beside Zayn and began to wipe away the mess Zayn had left on his stomach. "How would you feel if next time I used my tongue to clean this up?"

"I think you're going to be the death of me Harry Styles." Zayn laughed. "But, yeah I'd be up for that."

"Judging by the way your cock is getting bigger I don't think we'll have to wait long." Harry said as he gently stroked Zayn's stiffening cock.

"Maybe I can return the favour, fuck you into this mattress this time?" Zayn asked hopefully.

Harry leant in and kissed Zayn, easing his lips open with his tongue before pulling away. "I can't think of anything I'd like more."

Zayn took the initiative and flipped Harry over so he was on top now. "I'm going to fuck you so hard, we're going to need that gag this time."

"Use my headscarf." Harry said instantly.

"Your green one?" Zayn said excitedly.

"Fuck yeah." 

Before Zayn could move his phone beeped. He glanced over at the table to see it was a text from his Mum. 

'We are all popping out for the rest of the evening, you've got two hours. Enjoy'. Zayn showed Harry his phone.

"Your mum is the best. Guess we won't be needing that headscarf after all." Harry said with a hint of disappointment in his voice.

"I don't know, I'm still up for it if you are." Zayn winked. 

Harry sat up and pulled Zayn in close. "Tie me up instead, I've got two. If the house is empty I want you to see how loud I really can be."

Zayn leapt off the bed and took the headscarves out of Harry's overnight bag. Harry then spent the next two hours proving that it's not just fucking foxes that are loud.


	23. Chapter 23

New Years Eve came and went in a flash for Harry. Waking up next to Zayn that morning was amazing. They were both knackered and so they'd slept in a bit longer, considering they hadn't had much actual sleep. In fact Harry and Zayn had engaged in slow easy sex when they woke up. Harry was still open from last night, allowing Zayn to slip in without much resistance. Last night had been about fucking each other until they were boneless and exhausted. Whereas this morning was soft touches, tender caresses and edging each other until they were coming together in one long drawn out orgasm. Neither of them had felt like anything like it before. 

"I don't think I can move love."

"You're going to have to babe, you promised my mum you'd make cupcakes with her in an hour."

"Oh my god I forgot! Zayn you fucked the thought of a KitchenAid right out of me." Harry looked at Zayn in awe. "You're a wizard."

"Erm you're the one called Harry." Zayn joked.

"How am I supposed to make cupcakes when I'm not sure I can walk properly?"

"How am I supposed to sit still on a fucking chair in the kitchen after last night. Fuck Harry, your cock is like....well you know."

"You love my cock." Harry smirked.

"I love the boy the cock is attached to as well." Zayn smiled.

"Will you run me a bath, ease my aching limbs so I can make cake with your Mum?" Harry pouted.

Zayn was a sucker for Harry's pout. "Only if I can share."

"Yes!!!"

Forty five minutes later, both Harry and Zayn were suitably relaxed. If not still a little tender. Harry put on one of Zayn's hoodies and his own trackies, whilst Zayn wore his own trackies but Harry's hoodies. 

"We're wearing each others clothes, Louis would kill us if he could see us." Zayn said.

Harry took out his phone, pulled Zayn towards him and took a selfie of them both. He then sent it to Louis. Seconds later Harry's phone beeped with a text from Louis. 

'You are both disgraceful. I can't believe I even know you both.'

They burst out laughing and Harry sent a text back. 

'We love you both too Louis xx' 

Harry took Zayn's hand and they made their way down to the kitchen. The rest of the morning was spent with Zayn and Trisha making cupcakes in the kitchen. Well, Harry and Trisha making them and Zayn sitting at the kitchen table looking beautiful and being their taste tester. 

The afternoon was spent helping Zayn and his family prepare the house for the New Years Eve party they were hosting. Harry didn't think he'd ever seen so much food and drink in his life. They'd even laid on valet parking for guests who were driving. Harry was pleased the rest of the boys were coming later. He didn't want to spend all his time monopolising Zayn because it wouldn't be fair to Zayn's family and friends who didn't get to see him that often. 

The party itself was a whirlwind. Harry had lost count of how many times Zayn had introduced him to his family and friends as 'Harry, my boyfriend." It sent a shiver of excitement through him everytime Zayn said it, to the point where Harry was sure Zayn was now doing it on purpose. 

"Oh have you met Harry, he's my boyfriend." Zayn would say whilst running a gentle hand down Harry's spine. 

Harry managed to catch up with Niall, Liam and Louis, all three of them enveloping him in a big hug before Niall pushed the other two away and gave Harry his own hug. "Narry reunited." Niall shouted before Zayn suddenly appeared out of nowhere. 

"Alright Niall, finished with my boyfriend now." Zayn said before gently disentangling Niall from Harry.

"Oh Zayn did you want a hug too?" He grabbed Zayn and flung his arms around him. "Always Ziall too."

"You're a dick Niall, but I missed you."

"You too mate."

"Group hug!!!!" Louis screamed as he jumped on Zayn's back and encouraged everyone into a circle. "Happy New Year boys, here's to the next one and to Harry and Zayn finally sorting their sht out."

Harry looked over at Zayn and smiled, his dimples on full display. They broke apart and Niall dragged Harry onto the makeshift dance floor, with Zayn, Louis, and Liam watching on from the side. 

The rest of the evening passed quickly with more dancing until before Harry knew it there were only five minutes left till midnight and he was swaying in Zayn's arms. "I may be a little bit tipsy Zayn."

"Shots will do that to you babe." Zayn said kissing Harry on the cheek.

"No no cheek, only lips, lips Zayn!" Harry whined.

"I'm waiting for midnight."

"Stupid midnight."

"You know you're fucking adorable when you're drunk." Zayn said fondly.

"Not drunk love just tipsy." Harry said with a frown on his face, he looked like a kitten who has had water flicked at them.

"Sorry babe. Tipsy." Zayn looked at his watch to see there were now only two minutes left till the New Year. "Two minutes left."

Harry tried to stand up straighter in Zayn's arms, he placed both his hands either side of Zayn's face and looked at him intently. "I love you. You have no idea how much. Meeting you is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I love our boys, I love your family, but I love you the mostest."

"The mostest eh? Quite the wordsmith aren't you." Zayn laughed.

"No, don't tease. I'm trying to be a serious Harry."

"Ok, but you've only got one minute left babe."

"Zayn, you know I don't speak quick though." H sighed.

"Hurry then."

"I can't believe that someone like you could ever love someone like me. Thank you."

"Harry you don't..."

"Shush, Harry talking. If I ever do something wrong please don't stop loving me, talk to me first. "

"What are you going on about?"

"Zayn please promise, it's nearly midnight please."

"I promise." 

Harry sighed with relief. "Like you."

"Like you more babe."

"Not possible." Harry whispered as the clock struck midnight. He leant forward at the same time as Zayn as their lips softly brushed before Zayn's mouth opened to give Harry's tongue easy access. The past two days had been two of the best of Harry's life and as he kissed Zayn he let all thoughts of his family disappear from his head.


	24. Chapter 24

The second term passed in a blink of eye. Harry and Zayn had never been happier with each other. Harry was still working two jobs. Zayn and the boys would visit him at work on a Tuesday and Zayn would visit by himself on a Wednesday. Some of those times Zayn would spend chatting to Research Joe for the odd half hour. It made Harry happy to see them getting on. 

Everything in their life was good. Harry's studies were going well. He still had a few issues with a couple of dicks on campus who seemed to have a real problem with scholarship kids even being admitted to Oxford, but Harry ignored it for the most part. 

Niall was still carefree and single and loving every minute of it. Liam and Louis were still friends with benefits although Louis had let slip a couple of times to Zayn that he was worried he was starting to catch feelings for Liam. Zayn's response was sympathetic and then he told him if he ever used the phrase 'catching feelings, in his presence again he'd kick his arse. He then gave Louis a lecture about how catching feelings made it sound like a disease. 

Niall had managed to speak to someone about spending some time in a recording studio on campus and when Harry heard Zayn's voice for the first time he had to leave the room it was so overwhelming. The boys (not Zayn) didn't let him live that one down for a while. 

Zayn skyped with his family regularly and Harry joined him more often than not. He even had Doniya and Trisha's phone numbers and they often sent him pictures of baby Zayn which Harry used to torment Zayn. All in all it was a good time for everyone. 

Easter holidays drew ever closer and Harry had once more agreed to spend a couple of days at the Malik house. Zayn had said he was prepared to come and visit Harry in Holmes Chapel but Harry said he had family visiting so there wasn't really enough room. Zayn let it slide, maybe he shouldn't have. 

****************

It was the week before Easter holidays and Harry had picked up an extra shift or two at the bakery as it was a busy time for them. If Harry never saw another hot cross bun again he'd be a happy boy. Friday afternoon rolled around and Harry was working, Niall had class and Louis and Liam were once again indulging in some afternoon delight. 

"Fucks sake." Zayn picked up his phone and sent a message to Niall and Harry. 'Double L's are at it again, going to yours to study.'

'No worries love see you later, I'll bring you a muffin!'

'Course mate, Harry bring me a muffin too!'

'Will do Ni.'

Zayn picked his books up and made the familiar trip over to Harry and Niall's. He studied a lot at Harry's when he was at the bakery, then Harry would come home and they would go out somewhere. Harry would then stay over at Zayn's because Harry thought he had the best bed in the world, and it had the added benefit of Zayn being in it. Harry was working again tomorrow so Zayn was going to stay over at his tonight. Niall would be out so it was Netflix and take away. Zayn finally reached halls and made his way up the stairs to find two women knocking on Harry and Niall's door.

"Haz? Are you asleep? It's the middle of the day you lazy...."

"Gem stop it, he's obviously not here."

"He doesn't have a class this afternoon though."

"Maybe we should have called first before we came down."

"That kinda defeats the purpose of a surprise visit Mum."

Zayn couldn't see their faces, but he assumed this was Harry's Mum and sister. "Erm excuse me, are you looking for Harry by any chance?

"Oh goodness, you scared me." Harry's mum said.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to make you jump."

"Don't worry, Mum jumps all the time." Gemma said.

"You must be Harry's mum, and his sister. It's lovely to meet you Mrs Twist and you Gemma, I've heard so much about you it feels like I know you already.'

'I do hope Harry hasn't been giving away all of my dark secrets, I like to retain some mystery from my son. How do you know Harry?'

"I'm Zayn."

"Well you can call me Anne, Mrs Twist sounds so formal. Do you and Harry have classes together?'

"Erm, no." Zayn said looking puzzled.

'Do you live in the same halls as Harry?'

'No, I'm Zayn.' This is weird thought Zayn.

'Yes love you said, but how do you know Harry. Oh wait, are you one of Niall's friends?'

'You know Niall?'

'Feels like it, Harry is always going on about him isn't he Gemma." 

"Never shuts up." Gemma said.

"Always going on about Niall and his boys all the time, and the things they get up to. Oh are you one of Niall's boys?"

"Yeah I'm one of Niall's mates, that's how I know Harry. Well it was really lovely to meet you Anne and you too Gemma, but I've got a study session in ten minutes. I was just dropping something, erm a book off for Niall. I have a spare key so I can let you in to wait for Harry if you like, would that help?"

"Thanks love, that would really help. I need a comfortable bed to sit on after Gemma's driving."

"I'm not that bad Mum honestly." Gemma said for what sounded like the umpteenth time.

Zayn weaved his way between them and opened the door for them both. "Tell Harry I said hi and that I hope he enjoyed his surprise visit."

'"Of course love, and lovely to meet you too."

"Good to meet you Zayn, hope you and Niall aren't leading my brother too much astray."

"Nah not too much, I don't really know Harry as well as some of the others so you'll have to ask Niall about leading Harry astray." 

"Harry is staying with Niall and his family next week for Easter so I'm sure they'll be getting up to a lot of mischief between the two of them." Anne said.

"Sorry what?" Zayn felt sick.

"It's why we came down today, to surprise Harry because he won't be with us over Easter. Apparently Niall's family were nice enough to invite him, Harry spent New Year's with them as well. Were you there for that too?"

"No I had family obligations so I coudn't go, but I heard all about what an amazing New Year's Eve it was." Zayn was just about holding himself together at this point. He couldn't wait to leave, he needed air and a fag now. "I should be off, lots of studying for exams. Again it was really lovely to meet you. Bye." Zayn practically ran out of the door. and down the stairs. He took two huge lungfuls of air and began running. 

Zayn stopped on the way home to hastily send a text to Louis simply saying "love you love you love you" which was their emergency code for 'shit is going down stop whatever you're doing I need you'. By the time Zayn got home Louis had sent Liam away for beers and he was waiting on Zayn's bed nervously biting his nails. Louis looked up at Zayn standing in the doorway. "Are you alright?"

Zayn shook his head no. 

"Are you hurt?"

"So much Lou, so so much."

"Oh my god do you need a doctor? What can I do?"

"Not physically hurt."

"I don't understand. You did the code."

Zayn walked in threw his books on the floor, which shocked Louis more than anything, and then flopped face down on to the bed. 

"Is this about Harry?"

"Yes." Zayn mumbled. 

Louis sighed. "If you called me here because you and Harry have had a petty disagreement I will end you Malik." 

"It's not petty. Wasn't an argument. Haven't even spoken to him yet." Zayn said into the pillow. 

"Then what happened?"

He turned to face Louis. "I went to study at Harry's because you know."

"Sorry we'll try to keep it down next time."

"Doesn't matter. Guess I was meant to go over. I arrived and there was a woman and a girl maybe a few years older than us sort of hanging about outside their room. Anyway I recognised them from the pictures Harry has in his room. It was Harry's sister Gemma and his mum Anne, turns out they'd come to surprise Harry seeing as he was spending the first week of the Easter Holidays with his friend."

"His friend? Wait did they mean you?"

"If only. Turns out they thought he was staying at Niall's next week."

"I don't get it, he's staying with you though right?" Louis said with a look of puzzlement on his face. 

"Was supposed to be staying, don't know if I want that anymore." Zayn stopped talking and Louis remained silent for a minute knowing that Zayn wasn't finished. "It's stupid but I thought like Harry might be it for me. He's the first boy I've ever taken home and I know it's early and all but, fuck Lou my family love him and his family....they don't even know I exist." 

"What do you mean they don't know you exist? You've literally just met them."

"I introduced myself to Harry's mum, and she had no clue who I was, no fucking idea. Same with Gemma, not even a hint of recognition. Anne asked if I was one of Niall's friends because of course they fucking know who Niall is. They know all about Niall because Harry talks about him all the time, and oh apparently Harry stayed with Niall for New Years Eve too." Zayn said, the pain evident in his voice. "Is there something wrong with me?? Do I have I enjoy being fucked over and treated like shit' written on my forehead? I must be doing something to attract people like that who think I don't matter, who think I'm nothing, who have to pretend I don't exist."

Louis lay down beside Zayn and pulled him in close. He took Zayn's hand and began gently thumbing his Bus1 tattoo. "You're my best friend Zayn, you always have been and you will always be. I love you. I hate seeing you like this. You know there's nothing wrong with you right??"

"Then why does shit keep happening Lou?? Why??"

"Because people are cunts sometimes and you have a heart that's bigger than most. Have you spoken to Harry yet??"

"No I came straight back here."

"Maybe you should."

"I don't know if I can." Zayn sighed. "He told me he loved me. Fuck I.....when he came to stay at New Years....I...erm...I showed him my studio." Zayn couldn't help the tears now as they began to fall down his face. "I've never done that before, and I knew I was rushing, and.....like do you think he was embarrassed of me Lou, and maybe that's why he didn't tell them?"

Louis felt a lump rise in his throat that he only just managed to swallow back down. "No love I don't think that at all. Look I don't know what Harry's reasons are for not telling them, and to be honest I'm struggling to think of any remotely fucking acceptable ones. I do think that maybe you need to talk to him about it later, but for now shall we have a sleep?"

"Stay with me yeah?"

"Course Zayn. Always." Louis got up, switched the light off and drew the curtains until the room was in darkness. He quickly sent a text to Liam and Niall saying Zayn wasn't feeling too well so not to disturb him. He laid back down on the bed and spooned Zayn from behind pulling him as close as he could to him. He picked up Zayn's hand and placed a gentle kiss on his Bus1 tattoo, before Zayn did the same for Louis. "Love you Malik."

"Love you too Tommo."

Zayn and Louis both shut their eyes and tried to chase away everything that happened to Zayn that afternoon. 

****************

Harry had text Zayn a couple of times whilst he was working, but there had been no answer so Harry assumed he was too busy studying or maybe he had his headphones in listening to music and couldn't hear. As soon as Harry left the bakery with muffins firmly in hand he tried Zayn again, but nothing just his voicemail. "Hi love, I'm on my way back, I've got your favourite muffin and I don't mean Lou." Harry cracked up at his own joke. "Don't tell him I said that though. Anyway I'll see you in about 10 minutes. Like you." Harry hung up and began to think about this time next week when he would be leaving with Zayn and heading up to his house for the Easter holidays. In all honesty Harry couldn't wait. A whole week with Zayn, it was going to be great. 

He arrived back at halls and made his way upstairs. He got to the door and thought he could hear what sounded like female voices, maybe Zayn was watching TV. Harry opened the door to find his Mum and Gemma sitting chatting on his bed. Harry felt his stomach drop. 'Where's Zayn?"

'Harry Styles what sort of welcome is that for me and your sister. We've just driven all this way to see you!"

"Sorry Mum, it's lovely to see you both it really is." He came in and hugged his mum and Gemma. 

"Hey baby Styles."

"Where's Zayn?"

"Harry you're being very rude." Anne said.

"I know mum I know, but where is Zayn. Please. Why is he not here? Did he let you in? Have you met him?"

"Yes but only briefly. He arrived as Gemma was knocking on your door. We didn't know who he was obviously, but he knew who we were. We had a quick chat."

"About what? What did you talk about?"

"Mum explained that we'd come down to surprise you because you were going to spend Easter at Niall's. Then he let us in with a spare key and said to say hi to you. Then he left to study. Niall's got some pretty hot friends, has he got a girlfriend?" Gemma said. 

"Oh shut up Gemma." Harry said before placing the stupid muffins on his desk. 

"Harry honestly what is wrong with you, don't talk to your sister like that."

"It's fine mum. I'm not bothered. Has he though? Got a girlfriend? Or is he like all those posh boys with a girl in every college."

"I've got to go. I can't stay here." Harry said, trying to keep his panic under control.

"We've not driven all the way down for you to just up and leave without some sort of explanation."

"I need to see Zayn, that's my explanation."

"Aww does Harry have a crush on the posh boy." Gemma joked.

"I love you Gemma but sometimes your piss taking is too much. So what if Zayn's fucking posh. Why should that make any difference. He's the loveliest person I've ever met and now I've fucking ruined everything because I was so worried about what you and Mum would think of me." Harry shouted.

"Harry love, why don't you calm down a bit and explain what's wrong." Anne said looking at him with concern. 

"I will but I need to go. Stay here, Niall will be back in a bit. Love you." Harry ran out of the room leaving a very confused Anne and Gemma.


	25. Chapter 25

Zayn and Louis had been lying in the dark together for about an hour. Neither of them had slept. Zayn was too busy thinking about Harry and trying not to cry. Louis was too busy trying to comfort Zayn. Both of them heard the knocking at the same time followed by loud shouts of "Zayn."

They knew it was Harry instantly. 

"I'm not sure I can see him Lou."

"How about I answer the door and if I mange to stop myself from punching him, you give him five minutes."

"I don't know." Zayn said uncertainly. 

"I think you need to talk to him. I'm not saying you need to give him the benefit of the doubt, but I do think you need to know what's happening with his family."

"Fine he can have five minutes."

Louis got up to answer the door giving Zayn a minute to sit up in bed and try and compose himself. He could still hear Harry banging on the door so he closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths in preparation. 

*****************

Harry had never ran so fast in his life and now he was here outside Zayn's house banging on the door for all that he was worth. "Zayn! Zayn! Please answer the door.!" The door opened and he fell through it, Louis not bothering to help him up as he lay sprawled on the hallway floor. 

"Hello Harry do come in."

Harry scrambled up off the floor and was about to make his way to Zayn's room when he felt Louis grabbing his arm. 

"Don't think so. You have to listen to me first."

"I just want to talk to Zayn." Harry pleaded.

"What if he doesn't want to talk to you?"

Harry sighed. "I know I don't deserve to talk to him, but I only want to explain."

"Ok look. I love Zayn, he's my best friend always was always will be. I have never seen him this upset before and believe me he has gone out with some absolute fucking wankers. I think that tells you all you need to know about how much he felt for you."

"Did he tell you what happened?" Harry asked.

"Yes he did. What the fuck were you thinking Harry? Do you have any idea of how much he gave to you, he showed you his studio for fucks sake. Up until now I was the only person apart from his family who had seen it. Even Niall doesn't know about it and he's been to Zayn's house so many times. You were special." Louis sighed in frustration. "I'm so cross with you Harry you have no idea." Louis took a deep breath. "Right, just get the fuck in there and sort it out. I told Zayn to give you five minutes. Don't make me have to hurt you."

Harry didn't need telling twice, he bolted to Zayn's room and stood outside the door taking deep breaths and working up the courage to go in.

"You can come in Harry, I know what your breathing sounds like."

"Jesus fuck." Harry opened the door and walked in to see Zayn sitting up on his bed with his legs pressed close to his chest and his face resting on his knees. "Zayn."

"Hey."

He looks so sad thought Harry, he could also see how red Zayn's eyes were. Harry knew he had done that to him, he had made Zayn feel that way. However awful Harry felt, he knew Zayn was feeling infinitely worse. "Erm so...yeah...like"

"Is that it? My heart feels like someone has reached in and punched it and all you've got to say is 'erm, so, yeah like'. Thats the extent of what you have to say to me? Get out Harry." Zayn said tiredly. 

"No no wait, please. Ok so I assume you met my mum and sister?"

"Anne and Gemma. They seem nice. You look like them. You're a very attractive family." Zayn said with no emotion in his voice. "They seemed to know a lot about Niall."

"Yeah, yeah they do." Harry said feeling embarrassed and guilty.

"Harry, how come they know about Niall and not me?" Zayn said, voice barely above a whisper. "Are you embarrassed of me?"

"Never." Harry said, appalled that Zayn would even think that. 

"Then what, because I'm struggling to see why you wouldn't tell them."

"It's just difficult to explain."

"Try."

Harry sat there not saying anything and where Zayn had been upset before, now he was getting angry. "That's it, just silence. Nothing else no?"

"I'm trying to think of how to explain."

"Do you know how embarrassed I was? I introduced myself as Zayn and there was nothing, no reaction from them at all. Your mum had to ask me how I knew you Harry."

"What did you say?" Harry said the worry evident in his voice

"What did I say!!!!" Zayn stood up from the bed as Harry backed up against the bedroom door. Zayn could feel the the hurt fuelling his anger now. "Don't worry Harry your dirty little secret is safe with me, I didn't tell them. I just wanted to get out of there as soon as possible. I keep on going over and over it in my head. Why didn't Harry tell them? Is he embarrassed of me? Maybe he doesn't love me, maybe this is all casual for him and it's not serious. Or maybe just maybe somewhere deep down in the places you think don't exist you didn't want your Mum to know you were dating a brown boy. Zayn took a breath. 

"Is that it? My colour just a shade too dark for their liking? Wrong religion? God I'm such a dick, I was making all these plans you know for summer and even next year. I had it all worked out. You mentioned about wanting to travel around Europe and I thought we could go, not all fancy like, just on trains, me and you and a couple of backpacks, staying at hostels.'

'You don't even like hostels.' 

'Fucks sake it's not about the hostels, it's about you Harry. I'd go anywhere for you, I thought you would have realised that by now. I would do anything you asked of me. At least I would have. Until I met your Mum and sister and realised they didn't even know who I fucking was. I can pretend it doesn't hurt, I can pretend that I didn't feel sic to my stomach when your mum asked me how I knew you, but that would be a lie. I am many things Harry, but I'm not a liar. I will never be that.' Zayn turned away from Harry the hot angry tears threatening to spill from his eyes. "I'd very much like it if you left now please."

"No wait you haven't given me a chance to explain." Harry said beginning to walk towards Zayn.

Zayn turned round and put his hand out to stop Harry. "Don't. Please. I've got nothing left. I've got no energy left to fight. Can you just go."

"Zayn please."

"No Harry. No."

"Could I just....." Harry wanted to beg.

"If you cared for me at all then you'll leave now."

"But I don't...." Harry didn't know what to do, he wanted to stay and explain that the things Zayn thought were wrong, but he didn't want to upset him any further. It was Louis' decision in the end.

"Thats enough for now Harry, Zayn is exhausted. Leave him for a bit yeah." Louis said quietly.

Harry looked ay Zayn's back, seeing his trembling shoulders made Harry realise leaving was for the best. "Yeah alright." Harry turned away and began to walk out of Zayn's bedroom. Before he left he looked over his shoulder and in a quiet voice said "Like you Zayn." 

Zayn flinched and didn't utter a word. Harry sighed and followed Louis to the front door. "Is this it Louis?"

"He might just need some time."

"I didn't even get a chance to explain."

"What Zayn said in there about his religion and the colour of his skin, that's not the reason is it?" Louis said.

"Of course not, what sort of a person do you think I am." Harry said angrily.

"In all honestly I have no idea." Louis barely gave Harry time to say goodbye before he shut the door in his face and returned to Zayn to find him packing a suitcase.

"What are you doing?"

"I would have thought that was fairly obvious Lou."

"You're running home."

"I'm not running anywhere, I'm choosing to leave a week early and go and visit my family."

"Without Harry."

"Clearly." Zayn said, the annoyance apparent in his tone. "I don't want to talk about it Louis, so either help me pack or let me get the fuck on with it."

Louis knew there was no talking to Zayn when he was in a mood like this. He picked up Zayn's empty bags and began packing. 

****************

Harry wasn't sure how he made it back to halls in one piece safely. He'd wandered across roads without looking, stepped out in front of cycles and generally not paid attention to anything but wiping the tears from his face. He ran up the stairs and threw open the door to his room. Anne and Gemma were still sitting on the bed except Gemma was now eating Zayn's muffin. Harry glared at his sister before walking straight into the bathroom and locking the door. He slumped down to the floor.

"Harry love, what's wrong?"

'I just need a minute mum, please."

"Alright darling."

Harry took out his phone and text Niall to ask if he could have the room for the next hour. He didn't bother explaining why, he knew Niall would assume it was because he was with Zayn and he didn't feel up to having that conversation with him just yet. Harry then text Zayn, he was not under any illusion that Zayn would respond but he wanted to text him regardless. 

'I'm a coward, I'm not brave at all despite the front I put up. But please know that your skin colour and your religion have nothing to do with why I didn't tell my family about us. I hope that in time you'll give me a chance to explain.' 

Messages sent Harry stood up, washed his face, took a deep breath and got ready to face his mum and sister. He opened the door to find his mum standing right there. 

"Oh love what's wrong, was it something Gemma or I did? You seemed cross at us earlier?"

"No mum it's fine. Do you mind if we don't talk about it now? My plans have changed so I'll be home for Easter if that's alright?"

"Of course it is, you don't even have to ask. Holmes Chapel is your home isn't that right Gem."

"Yes mum, it'll be good to catch up Harry."

Anne enveloped Harry in a hug. "Do you want to be on your own for a bit love?"

"Yes please, I''m just exhausted from working and I have to be up early for work again in the morning."

"Mum and I will head off then Harry, I kinda feel like this was the worst surprise ever. Maybe when you're home we can have a chat."

"Yeah ok." 

Gemma stood up and joined the hug, Harry feeling safe but guilty and angry in his families arms."I'll be home on Thursday, do you fancy picking me up from the station Gem?"

"Sure no worries."

Harry pulled out of the hug as Anne and Gemma picked up their bags from the bed. 

"Take care of yourself love."

"Listen to Mum baby Styles, and text me your train times when you've got a minute."

"We'll see you next week then Harry. Love you." Anne said before kissing Harry goodbye.

"Love you too mum, and you Gem."

Anne and Gemma gave Harry one last hug and then they were gone. Harry went to the window just as he did on the first day and waved them off. He couldn't believe how much had changed in his life since then. Harry waited until he couldn't see them any longer, before drawing the curtains, undressing, switching all the lights off and then crawling into bed.


	26. Chapter 26

Zayn had been gone for seven days now and Harry had only left his room to work and go to the gym. Exercise helped him not think of anything. With work, he couldn't let Sadie down at one of their busiest times of the year, so on Saturday and Sunday he'd dragged himself out of bed and worked his arse off. They were so busy Harry was grateful to be working because it meant every minute of his day wasn't consumed with thoughts of Zayn. Only Zayn and Louis knew the real reason Zayn had gone home early. Niall had worked out that him and Zayn were fighting due to the fact Harry could barely manage to drag himself out of bed. 

"Harry it can't be that bad, you need to go to your final classes."

"No Niall just leave me be." Harry said as he burrowed himself even further down into his bed. 

Niall sighed and sat down on Harry's bed next to his head. "I say this with love and affection mate, you've not had a shower for three days and the room is starting to stink. Also if I hear Adele one more time I think I might scream."

"Great thanks Niall that's a real help." Harry said sarcastically. 

"Look if you get in the shower now and wash your hair I'll pet it when you get out."

Harry pulled the quilt away from his face. "Really. You'll play with my hair??"

"Yes, because you're my mate. I love you and I know you like your hair being petted, and although you're not going to tell me what happened, I know you're missing Zayn."

Harry pushed the cover back and stared up at Niall. "I fucked up Niall that's what happened, that's all you need to know." Harry got out of bed and made his way to the bathroom. "I'll be ten minutes." 

"Alright Harry." As soon as Harry closed the bathroom door Niall text Zayn. 

'I don't know what happened between you and Harry, but he's in a pretty bad way, please can you talk to him?'

His phone pinged before he could put it back down. 

'You're right Niall you don't know what happened, if you did maybe you'd be on my side rather than someone you've only know for a few months.'

'Zayn it's Harry. He's like an adorable kitten. Hasn't got a bad bone in him. I just don't get it.'

'Try asking him then Niall.'

Niall laid back on Harry's bed and realised asking Harry what happened was pointless as he'd never tell him. He looked up when the bathroom door opened. Niall thought the shower would help but Harry still looked shit. His eyes were red rimmed and he had bags under them where he obviously wasn't sleeping. "Come on then." Niall beckoned to Harry who immediately laid down beside Niall and shut his eyes. Niall immediately began running his fingers through Harry's hair entangling all the knots that had gathered over the past few days. "Is that alright?"

"Yeah it's good. Cheers Ni."

There was silence in the room for a few minutes until Niall broached a suggestion. "So as you've pretty much sacked off all your classes off for the rest of the night I was thinking I could drive you up to Zayn's to speak to him." Niall instantly felt Harry tense up beside him. "Nothing ever gets solved by not talking mate. Look we don't have to tell anyone. I'll borrow Louis' car, drive you there, give you an hour and then come back for you. What do you say?"

"I don't know Niall, I honestly think Zayn would shut the door in my face." 

"You don't know if you don't try."

"You'd wait for me?"

Niall could feel Harry's resistance waning. "Of course. You and Zayn you've got something special, we can all see it. For what it's worth I've never seen Zayn look happier."

"Until I ruined everything." Harry said miserably.

"Right lets go. Now." Niall said.

"What if he's not there."

"He'll be there. I imagine he's just as miserable as you to be honest. Let's just go and sort this out."

"Ugh fine." 

Niall stopped petting Harry's hair and rolled off Harry's bed. He grabbed his trainers and car keys and was ready to go. "Done let's move."

"Niall I can't wear this." Harry said looking down at his trackies with all the holes in and his scruffy old tshirt that he slept in.

"Harry. Zayn won't give a crap what you're wearing. Besides you make anything look good." Niall said beaming at Harry.

"Is that the kind of charm you pull out for the ladies Niall."

"You're getting the full Horan charm offensive. Is it working?"

"Not quite."

Niall pulled Harry off the bed and leant in. "You've got something on your tshirt, here let me." Niall brushed some non existent fluff from Harry's tshirt and then ran his thumb along Harry's collarbone. "Charm working now?" Niall said and winked. 

"Very funny get off me you dick." Harry laughed before pushing Niall's hand away. "You know whose collarbones I loved?" Harry said sadly. 

"None of that, put your boots on and let's go." 

Harry pulled his boots on, gave his hair a shake and was ready to go. He followed Niall downstairs and they made their way to Louis' for the car. 

****************

Zayn was miserable. He'd been moping around in doors for seven days, alternating between the kitchen and his bedroom. All his family knew was that he and Harry were having some problems so Zayn had come down early and Harry wouldn't be coming at all. Zayn had been too embarrassed to tell them that Harry's family didn't even know he existed let alone know he was Harry's boyfriend. 

Art was usually Zayn's sanctuary but he hadn't been able to paint or draw anything since he'd arrived. The most he'd done was spray paint one of the blank walls different shades of reds with some blue thrown in. Zayn was fiercely angry with Harry one minute, then unbearably sad the next. 

Niall and Liam were texting him regularly both hopeful him and Harry could work things out. Louis phoned every night and they talked till Zayn fell asleep managing to get a few hours in before he would wake startled from dreams of Harry. 

It had been another long day for Zayn, he was exhausted from lack of sleep and was really not in the mood for anything or anyone. He laid on his bed trying not to think about the last time he'd been home and how he'd spent it with Harry. He was startled by a knock on his bedroom door. 

"Sunshine?"

"Yes mum."

"Can you come downstairs for a minute please."

"If you've made dinner then I'm not really hungry, but thank you." 

"It's not dinner. Zayn please could just come down with me. For five minutes maybe."

Zayn sighed, he could never say no to his mum. "Yeah alright." He looked down at himself he only had his trackies on, but he couldn't be arsed to put a top on so this would have to do. The night he arrived home he'd found one of Harry's hoodies bundled up in his bed, he'd shut himself in his bathroom and talked to Louis for an hour before shoving the hoodie in his bottom drawer. It didn't stop him from looking at it every day so far. Zayn opened the door to find his mum waiting. 

"Jesus love you're all skin and bones. I swear I can see your ribs. Not eating isn't going to help whatever is going on with you and Harry.'

"If all I'm getting is a lecture I'm going back in my room." Zayn said sighing.

"Sorry sorry, that's it I won't say any more. Please come downstairs." Trisha held out her hand and Zayn took it and began following her down the stairs. They had almost reached the bottom when Trisha stopped and turned to Zayn. "You know I love you right."

"Nothing good ever comes from that opening to a conversation." 

"You know I do though?"

"Yes mum of course. What have you done?" Trisha carried on down the stairs with Zayn trailing behind. "You have a visitor."

Zayn felt sick, he knew what was coming before he even got to the bottom step and saw Harry standing hesitantly in the hall. He was hunched in on himself as though he was trying to make himself as small as possible. That wasn't the Harry Zayn knew. 

"Hi." Harry said glancing briefly at Zayn before looking down at the floor. 

"I'm going to leave you two alone, everyone is upstairs so you've got the lounge to yourselves. Good to see you Harry."

"You too Trisha." 

Trisha walked back upstairs leaving Zayn and Harry in the hallway. "See you've got my mum wrapped around your little finger. Ever the charmer."

Harry just stood there still looking at the floor. 

"Why did you come Harry?"

"I just wanted to talk to you and explain. You never gave me a chance to explain before."

"Was a bit too upset for that." Zayn snuck a look at Harry, he looked awful. Despite the obvious effort he'd made with his hair, the dark shadows under Harry's eyes all too similar to the ones currently residing underneath Zayn's eyes. Zayn sighed feeling the tiredness in his bones. 

"Come on then follow me, if I chuck you out now mum will only be quizzing me when you leave and I don't want her to know about what happened between us." Zayn walked into the front room and sat on the sofa, Harry followed him in and sat on the opposite sofa. "Just stay there a minute." Zayn walked back out and through the hall into the kitchen where he put on a hoodie he'd left in the kitchen last night. He took a deep breath before making his way back to the front room. Harry hadn't moved. Zayn sat back down and waited for Harry to speak. 

Harry hadn't failed to notice how sad Zayn looked. His eyes were red, and he looked knackered. Harry had done that to him and he felt sick at the thought. "I never meant to hurt you Zayn,"

"Well you did."

"I just....we were having the best time and I didn't want it to end."

"Why did you think it was going to end? Fuck Harry did I do anything that would have given you the idea that I wanted it to end! I told you I loved you. I invited you to meet my family and stay for New Year's, you were supposed to be here with me now." Zayn pulled his sleeves over his hands. "I don't understand. I know you said in your text it wasn't because of my skin or religion."

"I promise it wasn't, if you don't believe anything else I say please believe that."

"Then why Harry?"

'It's because you're rich.'

'What?" Zayn said, sounding confused.

"The reason I haven't told my Mum, and especially Gemma about you is because you're rich."

"You realise that makes no sense, considering they think Niall is your best mate, and apparently the best person ever."

"It makes sense to me."

"But how?"

Harry knew this was the point where Zayn wouldn't understand, but he had to tell him anyway. "Me coming to Oxford was such a huge thing Zayn you have no idea. My family were so supportive of me, because I was freaking out about what it would be like to study here on a scholarship. I was worried about what people would be like and that I would end up having to go back home because it would be so shit here. Then I met Niall and then you Zayn and you changed my whole idea of what being here at Oxford was going to be like." Harry took a deep breath. "All at the time at the back of my mind was a nagging thought about what my family would think. Every time I spoke to Gemma she would make cracks about posh boys and the Riot Club and me going off with one and forgetting about where I came from. How could I tell her that I'd fallen in love with one."

"So I wasn't worth it then." Zayn whispered.

"I never said that Zayn."

"You might as well have. You just said the reason you couldn't tell your family is because I'm rich. That you could't possibly tell Gemma how you felt about me, despite the fact that you say you are in love with me."

"I am in love with you Zayn." Harry pleaded.

"Is it even possible to be in love with someone your family doesn't even know exists? I mean how would that even work? Special family occasions I wouldn't be able to come to, no birthdays or holidays, nothing. Would you keep me hidden away somewhere, or would I just be your good friend that you invite to family stuff, oh no wait that would be Niall."

"My family are so important to me Zayn, I didn't want to disappoint them."

Zayn flinched.

"Fuck I didn't mean that, I didn't mean you are a disappointment."

"What it sounded like." Zayn said, staring at the carpet.

"Coming to Oxford was so hard for me, I didn't want to disappoint them by making them think I'd forgotten about them. God Zayn have you got any idea of what it's like to be judged by people at Oxford, to have people stare at you and make comments about you. I didn't want my family to be those people as well."

Zayn stared at Harry dumbfounded. "You're joking right. You're not serious. Fuck Harry I may be rich but to a lot of people I'm still the muslim boy with brown skin. I'm still the kid who got names shouted at them in the street so don't you dare fucking tell me I don't know what it's like to be judged by people." Zayn sighed and began to stand up. "I'd really like it if you left now Harry."

"No wait, I didn't mean it like that. I'm just really shit at explaining and Zayn please don't make me go, please. Can you remember when I said that if I ever did anything wrong you would still love me and you promised Zayn, you promised me." Harry could feel the tears welling up and he fought to hold them back. "I'll tell them Zayn about you I promise. I will."

"Wait, they still don't know about me? What did you say to your mum and Gemma when you got back to halls that day?"

"I just asked them to leave. Said I didn't want to talk about it."

"It's been a week Harry, and yet you still haven't told them about me. Sort of shows how important you think our relationship actually was. I'm going to get up now and go upstairs, please leave."

"Zayn, please don't. I'll tell them. I will."

Zayn sighed. "I'm not sure you will though. Disappointing your family or disappointing me, you made your choice and I'll have to live with it." Zayn stood up and left the room, leaving Harry to regret not ever having the courage to tell his family when he'd had the chance.


	27. Chapter 27

Zayn stood up and left Harry sitting on the sofa, and walked straight to the kitchen. He grabbed a water from the fridge and began drinking, he didn't even flinch when he heard the front door slam shut. Zayn sat down at the kitchen table and thought about what Harry said. In a weird way he could understand partly. Zayn didn't know what it was like to not have money, he could never appreciate what that felt like. He was still so cross that Harry didn't even give Zayn a chance to meet his family, that what they had was going nowhere because Harry didn't have enough courage to tell his family about them. Zayn looked up as his mum walked him and joined him at the kitchen table.

"Harry gone then?"

"Yep."

"Are you cross I let him in?"

"A little bit, I'll get over it."

"Do you want to tell me what happened??" 

Zayn sighed. "I met Harry's Mum and sister last week."

"Ooh what were they like??" Trisha said, with excitement in her voice.

"They seemed nice, Harry looks like them."

"Love did something happen with Harry's family?" Trisha moved closer to Zayn and held his hand. 

"They'd come to surprise Harry because he was going to be away for Easter."

"Everyone was looking forward to him coming. Saf already had plains for braiding his hair again."

"Mum." 

"Sorry, go on."

"I went to study at Harry's because he was working and I needed the quiet."

"Louis and Liam??" Trisha said with a knowing glance.

Zayn laughed. "Yeah. So erm I got to Harry's and his mum and sister were outside and they didn't know who I was." Zayn said quietly.

"I don't understand." Trisha said with a confused look on her face. 

"I mean they knew all about Niall, they even thought Harry was staying with Niall over Easter."

"Oh sunshine." Trisha said, her heart aching for Zayn.

"They didn't even know my name, didn't know I existed, certainly didn't know I was Harry's boyfriend. Nothing. No hint of recognition when I said my name." Zayn wiped away a small tear, he'd done enough crying over this. 

"Why wouldn't Harry tell them? You two are perfect together and the way you looked at each other over New Years, I felt certain this was it."

"Harry came up with some bullshit excuse about his family not wanting him to date a 'posh boy'. He didn't even give me a chance to meet them, didn't give them a chance to see us together and maybe change their minds. I love him so much Mum and like he looked so sad earlier, I've never seen him like that before. But, how can I be with someone who doesn't believe in us enough for his family to know I exist."

Trisha reached out and drew Zayn into her arms. "I can't speak for Harry, but I know how scary it is the first time you bring your boyfriend home to meet your parents. Will they like him, what if they don't, what do I then."

"Yeah but you still....."

"Ok think about it from Harry's family's point of view. Harry has been awarded a scholarship for Oxford. He's going to be in an environment that is completely alien to him with no friends and family around him, something a parent or sister might naturally worry about. Over the three years he's at Oxford he might change a bit, grow apart from his family, make new friends, maybe friends who are wealthier than his family. Their friends might have families who have jobs that are considered more prestigious by society than his own family. He might even fall in love with someone he meets at Oxford." Trisha said smiling at Zayn.

"Someone who doesn't even need to get a job because they already have enough money to do whatever they want in life. Now a parent or sister might panic and think they're losing their son or brother to a world they could never be a part of, a world where they would feel uncomfortable or unwanted. Instead of encouraging him to meet someone at Oxford, they remind him not to forget his roots or get entangled with a so called 'posh boy' because they're afraid of losing him. What is the son or brother supposed to do? Does he listen to his family, the only support network he's had for his whole life so far? Or does he throw that all away for a boy he falls in love with. The romantic side of me would say fuck what anybody else thinks."

"Mum! You're not supposed to swear." Zayn said smiling. 

"Harry is in an unfamiliar environment without his friends or family. He has nobody he can talk to about this so he's scared. He's torn between the approval of his family or you sunshine. What is he supposed to do?"

"He's supposed to pick me Mum, that's what he's supposed to do." Zayn said miserably. 

"In a bloody rom-com that's what he'd do and then his family would come round and everyone would live happily ever after. As much as I'd like to live in a world like that Zaynie sometimes we don't. Far from it. Don't give up on him love, fear can be crippling and it makes us all do things we regret. Do you think he still loves you?"

Zayn thought back to earlier and Harry sitting in the sofa across from him. "Yes."

"Then don't count him out yet. He could surprise you."

Zayn closed his eyes and really hoped his mum was right. 

****************

Harry ran out of Zayn's house and down the driveway to find Niall's car waiting for him. He opened the car door, got in, and promptly burst into tears. 

"Oh mate."

"I shouldn't have come, fuck Niall I've just made it worse. Can you take me home please?"

"Oxford home, or Holmes Chapel home?"

"Would I be taking the piss if I said Holmes Chapel?"

"It's fine, but I might have to kip on your floor because it's been a long drive and I'm knackered."

"Of course, you're more than welcome." 

Niall pulled away and they made the journey back to Harry's village. Niall didn't bother Harry during the drive back, and he discreetly ignored the sniffs he could hear every now and again coming from Harry. They eventually arrived Holmes Chapel in the early hours of the morning. Niall had text Louis to say he was taking Harry home and that he'd drop the car back in the morning, somehow Harry didn't think Louis would appreciate a text from him. 

"So this is my house."

"It's lovely Harry." Nail said, as he parked up outside Harry's house.

"It's small."

"Doesn't matter how big it is, what was it like growing up there."

"Wonderful." Harry said.

Niall smiled. "That's all that's matters then isn't it. A proper home is made up of the people who love and love in it."

Harry put his head in his hands. "My family doesn't know about Zayn."

"You haven't told them that you're fighting at the moment? Why do they think you're not staying at Zayn's for Easter holidays?" 

"Fuck." Harry knew he might as well tell Niall now. "They thought I was staying with you."

Niall looked puzzled. "I don't understand."

"When I said my family doesn't know know about Zayn, I mean they literally don't. They have no idea who he is and they definitely don't know he was my boyfriend."

"Was? Not is?" Niall said softly.

"Well I've pretty much fucked everything up there."

"Why didn't you tell them? Harry it's not because....."

"No of course not. I tried to explain to Zayn earlier but it all came out wrong and now he probably hates me and I've ruined everything and I just......" Harry looked up at Zayn with watery eyes. "I love him so much Niall." 

"Harry mate." Niall placed a reassuring hand on Harry's shoulder. "I think the first thing you need to do is tell your family about Zayn and then go from there." 

"I know." Harry said wiping his eyes. 

"Do you want to tell me the reason why you never told them??"

"It's going to sound stupid, but it made sense to me at the time. Now I wish I'd just told them." Harry sighed. "Getting a place at Oxford was huge and every time I spoke to Gem or my mum they'd always be really supportive, obviously."

"But?"

"Gem would always tease me about running off with a posh boy and forgetting about where I came from, or they'd both always ask about my posh friends as if it was a bad thing. Like I even told Gem about Joe and she was all brilliant he's a scholarship kid. I thought if I told them about Zayn they'd be...."

"Disapproving somehow?"

"Yeah."

"It's funny because I bet when Zayn took you home you were nervous about what his family would think of you, whether they'd approve of this scholarship kid dating their wealthy son."

"Just a bit. I was so scared I didn't know if I was going to actually go inside the first time I saw Zayn's house."

"Harry do you really think your family would have disapproved of you falling in love? Or do you think they would be happy that someone loved you and made you happy. Do you think that your family would have treated Zayn badly if you'd introduced him to them?"

"They're good people. Gem can be a bit much sometime and she'd would have ripped it out of me for dating a posh boy. But, I don't think they would have been rude to him." 

"Would they want you to be happy??"

"That's all they've ever wanted."

"Zayn does that yeah?" Niall said.

"So so much. I've fucked it though now." Harry said, full of despair.

"Maybe not Harry. Trust the Horan he'll sort it for you." Niall said before giving Harry a huge hug.


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for slight anxiety

Harry had snuck Niall up into his room managing not to wake anyone up in the process. He didn't want to have a conversation about Zayn with his family at 1.30am so he scrambled into his single bed and Niall took the floor. 

"Things might seem better in the morning mate."

"I doubt it, but thanks Niall for being a good friend."

"Anytime. Besides you and Zayn are perfect for each other and I want you both to be happy." 

"We'll see. Night Ni."

"Night Harry."

Truth be told Harry didn't get that much sleep between thinking about Zayn and about what he was going to tell his family. He woke Niall up around 7.30am and they made their way downstairs. Niall made them both tea, and Harry stood and bit his nails. Around eight he could hear movement upstairs and he took a deep breath. 

"You ready mate?"

"As I'll ever be." Harry took a long gulp of his tea before finally he could hear footsteps coming down the stairs. Anne stepped into the kitchen to see a miserable Harry and a blond haired boy she'd never seen before. 

"Harry?? 

"Hi mum."

"What on earth are you doing here? Why aren't you in class? Has something happened? Who is this with you??" 

"This is Niall."

"Oh how lovely. We've heard such a lot about you Niall, I'm Anne. It's a pleasure to meet you." Anne said, smiling widely at Niall.

"It's a pleasure to meet you too Anne." 

"What possessed the two of you to drive up here. I thought you were staying at Niall's house for Easter?"

"Is Gemma here?" Harry said, avoiding Anne's questions.

"Yes love she arrived yesterday morning."

"Do you think you could wake her up and get her to come down. I want to talk to you about something." Harry glanced at Niall who gave him a reassuring nod. 

"Harry you're not in trouble are you??" Anne said with a worried look on her face. 

"Promise I'm not."

"Ok I'll just get Gemma then. You can both make yourself comfortable in the front room." 

Anne left the kitchen and Harry walked into the front room and sat on the sofa. Niall followed him in and sat down close beside him. Niall looked around the room and saw lots of photos of Harry and Gemma growing up through the years. 

"You look like you're close to your sister."

"Yeah I am."

"It'll be alright Harry."

"Will it?"

"Do you want to be with Zayn?"

Harry looked pained. "Of course, more than anything I think." 

"Then you can do this."

"Baby Styles you better have a good reason for waking me up this early, you too Blondie."

Harry saw Niall's mouth drop open at the sight of Gemma in her pyjamas. Leaning in, Harry whispered in Niall's ear. "Sisters are off limits Horan."

"Fine." Niall huffed. 

Anne soon followed Gemma and sat on the armchair with Gemma perching on the arm. 

"Spill it then Hazza, what have you done." 

"Last week when you came to surprise me, do you remember Zayn?"

"We're hardly likely to forget him Harry, he was beautiful."

"He was the friend of the two of you is that right?" Anne asked. 

"Sort of." Harry said before glancing down at the carpet. 

"Go on Harry." Niall said. 

"What does sort of mean love?" 

Harry looked this mum. "It means he's more than a friend."

"Ooh Harry's got himself a posh rich boyfriend."

That was it for Harry. "Piss off Gemma."

"Harry don't talk to your sister like that." Anne said with disapproval in her voice. 

"Oh right but Gemma's allowed to take the piss out of me. This is how I got in this mess in the first place. Yes Gemma I do have a boyfriend and we've been together since November. I spent New Years with him and I was going to spend Easter with him and not Niall. Yes he is rich but that's not all he is. He's an artist and a friend and a brother and a son and he's the kindest most decent person I know. I'm very much in love with him, but I've ruined everything because I was so scared of what you all would think. He makes me so happy and I've thrown it all away because I was too scared you'd disapprove of him because he's rich." Harry's breath was beginning to come in gasps so Niall placed a comforting hand on his knee and squeezed. 

"He thought you knew all about him and he was so hurt when he found out you didn't know he existed. Now I don't know what to do because being without him hurts like nothing else, and so I'm sorry if I've disappointed you but I can't keep him a secret any longer. I know you didn't want me to meet a 'posh boy' but I couldn't help it because he's Zayn and he's just...." Harry buried his face in his hands and Niall pulled him into his embrace as Harry's sobs echoed around the room. It was Gemma who spoke first. 

"Niall do you think you could give us five minutes with Harry please."

"Haz is that alright?" Niall whispered.

Harry pulled away from Niall and simply nodded.

"I'll be in the kitchen mate." Niall placed a gentle kiss on the top of Harry's head and left the room. 

"Harry look at me. H please look at me." Gemma said. 

Harry looked up and wiped the tears away with the sleeve of his hoodie. Gemma and Anne both got up and came and sat either side of Harry. Anne nodded at Gemma for her to speak first. 

"I'm so sorry Harry for making you feel like you couldn't tell us about Zayn. I think maybe I was scared.....I mean shit Harry you got a scholarship for Oxford that's huge.... and erm....I was worried you might forget us and get caught up with Oxford with all your new posh mates and forget about little old Holmes Chapel. That's why I banged on about it so much. I realise that was wrong and if I've ruined your chance at happiness then I'll never forgive myself." 

"I should have been brave enough to tell you about him though. I'm not blameless in this Gem."

"Harry, all myself, Robin and Gemma want is for you to be happy and if Zayn makes you happy then that's good enough for us. I'm not going to lie, if you had told us we may have had some reservations because of how well off Zayn might be and the difficulties that might have caused. But, we would like to meet him and work through that. It's not too late is it?"

"I think it might be mum. He was so hurt and angry when he found out you didn't know who he was." 

"Oh love isn't there anything that we could do??"

Niall knocked on the front room door before stepping in. "Not that I was eavesdropping or anything but I think maybe Gemma might be able to help if she doesn't mind a road trip."


	29. Chapter 29

Zayn had spent most of the night in his studio working on his walls. Seeing Harry and speaking to his mum had let something loose in him. He'd just finished up a comic book version of Harry with big curls, overly green eyes and red lips who was reaching out for different comic versions of Zayn who were always slipping just out of reach. He locked his studio and flopped down on his bed. The exhaustion wiped him out straight away and for the first time in four days he slept for three hours straight. The sound of his phone ringing woke up him. He looked at the screen to see it was Niall. He pressed decline call, he knew Niall had driven Harry here and he wasn't really in the mood to chat just yet. The phone stopped only to start again thirty seconds later. Zayn knew Niall wouldn't give him any leave so he answered. "What Niall."

"Is that any way to answer your phone?"

"Really not in the mood." 

"That's why I'm phoning. I'm here to apologise. In person. Get out of bed and answer your door."

Zayn sat up in bed. "Are you serious? You're outside?"

"Yes and it's about to rain so if you could get a wriggle on that would be grand." Niall then hung up. 

"That little fucker." Zayn looked down at what he was wearing. Paint splattered shorts and a tshirt. It was only Niall so he wasn't bothered. Zayn got up from the bed and walked down the stairs muttering to himself all the way. He reached the front door and opened it to find a smiling Niall, a sad Harry, and surprisingly an apologetic Gemma. "No." Zayn said before slamming the door shut. 

Niall began knocking on the door. "Zayn please open the door, we just want to talk. All of us."

"It's no use he doesn't want to talk to me or see me. It's too late, can we please just go home Niall." Harry said. Zayn didn't miss how broken he sounded. 

The knocking began again, only this time it was followed by a female voice. "Erm hello Zayn? I'm Gemma Styles."

"He knows who you are Gem." Harry said wearily. 

"Alright I was just trying to start a conversation. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing Harry, I'm winging it here." He heard Gemma take a breath and then knock again. "Yeah so I'm Gemma, Harry's sister."

"Fucks sake Gemma, he knows alright, how many times have I got to say it." 

"Alright Styles siblings let's take it down a notch yeah and remember the reason we're here. Zayn open the door before they kill each other and you have to explain to your mum why there's a shitload of blood on your driveway."

Zayn sighed, he knew Niall was stubborn and wouldn't be going anywhere anytime soon so he opened the door.

"Thank fuck, now please can we come in."

Zayn held the door opened and beckoned them in. Niall bounded through the door all smiles as usual. Harry and Gemma trudged in looking like they had the weight of the world on their shoulders. "Let's go in the kitchen." 

Niall went on ahead and put the kettle on. "Make yourself at home mate." Zayn said sarcastically.

"I'm ignoring the sarcasm Zayn because you'll be thanking me later."

"Oh will I."

"Yep. Now I'm making tea for everyone while you all chat."

Niall busied himself grabbing cups out of the cupboard and getting the teapot ready. Zayn, Harry and Gemma stood awkwardly around the breakfast table before Zayn sighed, pulled a chair out and sat down. "You might as well both sit down too."

Harry and Gemma both sat down hesitantly, Harry pulling nervously on the sleeve of his hoodie, his leg moving up and down non-stop. 

"Harry, stop alright you look like you're about to pass out." Zayn said.

Harry put his head in his hands. "I'm so sorry." He looked up again trying to maintain his composure and not cry. "Do you mind if I use your bathroom quickly? I know you don't want me in your house so I'll be really quick, and then we can talk and stuff and I just erm....please Zayn?" 

Zayn could only nod his head at Harry, he knew if he spoke his voice would crack and he was trying his best to remain emotionless. Faced with an obviously distressed Harry it was proving very difficult. Harry couldn't get out of the room fast enough.

"Zayn, I'm going to go check on Harry. I'll leave you and Gemma to it." Niall made a swift escape to find Harry, leaving Zayn and Gemma in silence at the table. 

"It's nice to meet you Zayn, although I wish it was under better circumstances."

"Nice to meet me even though I'm a posh boy?" Zayn sneered.

"Ok getting right to it. I can appreciate that." Gemma said with respect in her voice. "Harry explained to Mum and me why he didn't tell us about you."

"By mention do you mean that I'm his boyfriend and we've been together since November." Zayn wasn't going to let Gemma off easy.

"Yeah. Niall had this idea that we'd drive down here and somehow I could fix things between you and Harry."

Zayn looked at her doubtfully.

"I wasn't convinced either, but Niall is very persuasive."

Zayn couldn't help but smile at that. "Yeah he is."

"I'm not really sure where to start and to be honest I don't know how much you know about what it was like for Harry growing up."

"He's told me everything." Zayn thought back to the long talks they'd have in bed when Harry stayed over. Both of them would talk about their families and the different experiences they'd had whilst growing up. 

"Oh right." Gemma looked surprised. "He's never told anyone everything before." 

"Neither had I till I met Harry. Then everything went to shit."

"I'm hoping I might be able to turn that around." Gemma chanced a smile at Zayn but he remained stony faced. "Right so I know you already know a lot of this but I'll try and explain growing up from my perspective. When my Dad left it was just me, mum, and Harry for a good few years before Robin came along. We looked out for each other because nobody else was going to and we made the best of what we had. Mum worked a couple of jobs and me and Harry looked after each other. For a while all we had was each other, and so I think maybe, no I know I became over protective of Harry." Gemma sighed. 

"Harry never hid who he was from anyone and for the most part nobody cared, despite the pre-conceived ideas people have about small villages. But, some children can be really cruel to anyone who is a bit different and so Harry got his fair share of teasing. I didn't handle that well. Harry mentioned on the drive down that you have sisters and one of them is older. I imagine she was pretty protective over you?" Gemma said hopefully, trying to establish some sort of rapport with Zayn.

Zayn didn't have to think hard about it. Doniya was like a lioness when it came to Zayn and his sisters. Woah betide anyone who fucked with them. Zayn smiled. "She was pretty fierce." 

"I imagine you're close to your sisters??"

"I'd do anything for them." Zayn said without hesitation. 

"Same here I'd do anything for Harry. When we found out he got into Oxford we were all so excited. I mean Harry is super clever so it wasn't a surprise, but we were so proud of him you know? He'd been awarded a scholarship for his academic ability and that was incredible. I think that's maybe when I started to worry. It sounds stupid I know but I just didn't want him to get hurt. I had this image in my head of Harry going to Oxford and people just taking advantage of him. He's such a good person, he always see the best in everyone no matter what and I thought that...."

"That some posh boy like me would break his heart." Zayn said.

"Yeah something like that. My perception of Oxford is possibly slightly skewed." Gemma said looking down at the table embarrassed.

"You think?"

"I was just worried for him. There's nothing worse than seeing one of your family hurt. So, I wanted to apologise because I feel responsible for Harry not telling us about you."

"He has his own mind Gemma."

"You're absolutely right, but I've been told on more than one occasion that I have a forceful personality and I know that Harry wouldn't have found it easy to tell us. I teased him a lot about not forgetting us and running off with someone posh. That was wrong of me. I let my own insecurities and fears overshadow Harry's experience and in the process hurt someone he is so obviously in love with. I don't know you Zayn, but I would really like the chance to get to do so. If you let me?" Gemma took a shakey breath and looked down at the table again.

"I think I should probably talk to Harry first." 

"Of course. Niall can keep me entertained in here if that's alright? He's quite amusing."

Zayn laughed. "He'll love that."

"What will I love Zayn?" Niall asked as he walked in the kitchen followed by a clearly upset Harry. 

"Gemma finds you amusing, so you can keep her entertained whilst Harry and I have a little chat." Harry's eyes lit up with a spark of hopefulness.

"Sure no worries mate, I'm good at entertaining the ladies.....ouch!" Niall shouted as Harry's arm shot out and punched him. "What was that for?"

"She's my sister, remember." Harry warned.

"Yeah alright, I know how to keep it in my pants."

"Er hello, your sister is over here and perfectly able to decide whether or not Niall keeps it in his pants or mine." Gemma said.

"Oh but you get a say on who keeps what in mine." Harry said angrily.

Gemma had the decency to look apologetic. "Yeah ok, fair point." Gemma muttered. 

Harry still looked upset and angry at the same time. Zayn stood up and walked toward Harry who immediately looked down at the kitchen floor. 

"Do you want to talk??"

Harry just nodded his head. 

"We can go in the front room."

"Yeah ok." Harry whispered. 

Zayn reached for Harry's hand out of habit, before immediately dropping his hand back down to his side. "Fuck." Zayn   
took a deep breath and left the room with Harry following close behind him. Neither of them said anything until they were both sitting down opposite each other. 

"May I please go first Zayn?" Harry said.

"Yeah ok."

"I wanted to apologise for just turning up unannounced on your doorstep again. Niall thought it would be a good idea."

"You didn't want to come then?" Zayn said the upset apparent on his voice. 

"Fuck of course I wanted to come Zayn. I've missed you so much, but I didn't want to upset you again." Harry took a deep breath. "Now I'm here I wanted to say that I'm so very sorry for what I said last time I was here. Of course I don't know what it's like to be you Zayn or the difficulties that you've faced growing up and I could never understand that. I didn't mean to diminish that in any way by what I said, and I don't think I'll ever be able to apologise enough." Harry paused for a minute. "I don't know what Gemma said to you, if any of it made sense. I take responsibility for my actions because I shouldn't have let them effect me like that. I've no right to ask Zayn....but if there's any like...if there's any chance that we could give it a another go I would really like that...or even just be friends...because I've missed that too, just hanging out with you and being stupid. It feels like I've lost my friend too Zayn." Harry wiped away a stray tear or too hoping that Zayn wouldn't notice. He did. 

"I've not been able to paint since we argued. I haven't slept properly, I can't eat, I'm fucking miserable Harry. Family is so important to me. My family and friends are all I have and so when I found out that your family didn't even know about me it hurt me so badly." 

"I'm so sorry Zayn I really am."

Zayn stood and moved sofas so that he was now sitting next to Harry. He heard Harry's breath hitch as he waited for Zayn to do something. "I don't understand what it was like for you to grow up in an environment where you struggle financially, but I do know what it's like to grow up being judged. I know you didn't do it on purpose Harry because you're just not that sort of person. You're good, and decent and kind and that's why I love you."

"Love not loved?" Harry said with a hint of hope in his voice. He let his eyes on the sofa for fear of seeing nothing in Zayn's eyes.

"Yes Harry, love. Can I show you something??"

"Yes."

Zayn stood and took Harry's hand in his. "Come with me for a minute yeah?" 

"Alright." Harry took Zayn's hand as they walked through the the hall to the bottom of the stairs. "I always thought you should have a fancy old school lift like they have in black and white films."

Zayn couldn't help smiling. He'd missed Harry so much. "You're an idiot. You've got enough stamina to make it up three flights of stairs."

"I've got enough stamina for a lot of things love." Harry whispered.

Zayn felt the familiar swoop in his stomach at the thought of Harry's stamina. He'd been on the receiving end of that on numerous occasions and it made him a bit breathless even thinking about it. 

"Zayn? Are you alright?"

"Erm yeah, sorry I zoned out for a bit there." 

Harry smirked because he knew exactly why Zayn had spaced out.

Zayn gently elbowed him. "Shut up."

"What? I didn't even say anything." Harry said smugly.

"You know what. You may not have said it out loud but you were thinking it."

"Oh you're a mind reader now, I hadn't realised. Tell me what I'm thinking now." Harry winked at Zayn.

"Something filthy I imagine. Come on stop dawdling I want to show you something." Zayn said pulling Harry gently up the stairs. They walked past the library and Harry stared sadly at it. Zayn stopped. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah I just....erm....I didn't think I was going to get to see your library again and so like.....god...sorry..."Harry said wiping away a stray tear. 

"Harry it's only a library."

"I know I know I'm sorry, I'm being stupid as usual."

"Hey, don't call yourself stupid that's not what I meant."

"It's just that the library and your studio are the places I associate with you and after everything that happened I didn't know if I'd get to see them again."

"Harry it's been a week."

"Yeah alright, so I'm a bit dramatic but it really has felt like the longest week of my life."

"All eighteen years of it."

"Zaaaayyynnn." Harry whined.

"Sorry babe, it's just you're too cute when I'm teasing you and you get all pouty." 

"Oh." Harry gasped.

"What?"

"Nothing, it's nothing. Sorry I'm alright."

"Did I say something wrong?" Zayn frowned.

"No." Harry beamed. "It's just you called me babe, and that was the first time since you know...."

It had just slipped out without Zayn realising, but Harry looked so delighted that he didn't want to burst his bubble. "Well you've seen the library and drooled over it so can I get on now with showing you what I actually wanted to?"

"Sorry." 

"Harry, you don't have to keep on saying it and don't now apologise for saying sorry. Let's just carry on up the stairs yeah?"

"Alright."

They carried on walking up the stairs and into Zayn's bedroom. "Ok so you know I haven't been able to paint properly since this all happened. Well I painted one of my blank walls, but it's absolute rubbish so don't like judge for me that. Anyway last night I started and I couldn't stop so I wanted you to see it." Zayn had locked his studio this morning so he grabbed the key from his not so secret hiding place and unlocked it. "You can go in."

Harry walked in and immediately saw what was once one of Zayn's blank walls painted in reds and blues. "Is erm...is the red because you were angry?"

"Yeah. I know it's really simplistic but like I was quite blocked and I just needed to get the anger out somehow and I figured this was the best way of doing it without punching something."

"I know what you mean, I just punched something." Harry said. "I mean I wasn't angry with you obviously, I was angry at myself."

"Wait, so you punched something?"

"It's alright, I used to box at the weekend in college sometimes so I popped out to the university gym a couple of times to get all my frustration out. "

"Hold on, why am I only now hearing about the boxing?"

"I only did it for a bit, I didn't think it was that interesting."

"Right yeah not interesting at all." Zayn tried not to imagine a sweaty and flushed Harry boxing, but it was proving difficult.

"Erm, what is the blue for?"

"It's a bit embarrassing because I was being literal. I was feeling blue over what happened so I used that. It's crap, but it helped I think."

"I'm sorry I made you sad Zayn."

"Hey what did I tell you about apologising."

"To stop it."

"So stop. The wall wasn't why I told you to come up. Well not that wall anyway. I wanted to show you this." Zayn stepped to the side to show him the wall with the comic book version of Harry chasing him. 

"Jesus Zayn it's amazing."

Zayn looked down at the floor."Thanks."

"Talented and beautiful." Harry murmured.

"I don't know about that."

"I do. I've always known it."

"Ever the smooth talker Styles." Zayn joked.

"I'm serious. Look." Harry slid his hand and pulled out his phone. "Call me."

"I'm standing right next to you, why would I call you."

"Please Zayn." Harry fluttered his eyelashes and pouted.

"You can't do that every time babe." Fuck Zayn thought.

"Just this once." Harry pleaded. 

"Fine." Zayn walked back into his room and grabbed his phone off the bed. He picked it up and scrolled down to dimples and pressed call. Harry's phone started blaring out Adele.

"Fuck fuck fuck."

Zayn smiled. "Haz why is Adele now your ringtone?" Zayn said as he walked back into the studio phone in hand.

"It reflected my mood at the time alright." Harry whined.

"So what am I looking at, or did you just want me to hear a bit of Adele."

Harry held up his phone to Zayn.

"Why does it say IBB calling? What does that mean? Am I IBB? Please can I hang up now."

"Shit sorry, yeah just hang up." There was silence as Adele finally stopped. "You are indeed IBB." Harry smirked.

"You're loving this aren't you."

"Maybe just a little."

"Are you going to tell me."

"When you gave me your number I put it in as Zayn, but I changed it when I got back to my room to IBB because it's the first thing I thought when I met you."

Zayn put his head in his hands before looking up. "Do I really want to know?"

Harry looked back at him excitedly, dimples on full display.

"I give in I'm never going to guess it."

"Ok drum roll please." Harry waited for Zayn but just silence. "Please."

Zayn tried to keep his smile inside before making a drum roll noise, well a muted drum.

"Worst drum roll I've ever heard, but you're not experienced like me so I'll let is slide."

Zayn loved Harry when he was like this. 

"So......I feel like I've maybe built this up way too much now and you're only going to be disappointed." Harry said.

"Jesus Harry drag it out why don't you. I promise I won't be disappointed, embarrassed maybe."

"Alright alright." Harry said before looking down at the ground and mumbling something that was unintelligible. 

"Harry. Come on now just say it."

"It means impossibly beautiful boy." Harry said looking right at Zayn before concentrating on his boots and blushing furiously. He was aware that Zayn had moved towards him and was now standing right in front of him. Neither of them moved. "Say something Zayn please, before I die of embarrassment." Harry said before holding his breath. 

Zayn took Harry's hand and brought it up to his lips, before gently placing a kiss along each knuckle. "Like you." 

Harry looked up to see Zayn's beautiful smile beaming at him. "Like you more."


	30. Chapter 30

Gemma and Niall had resorted to playing poker. Niall wanted strip, but Gemma told him he'd have to take her out for a Guiness first to which he readily agreed. "Your brother is going to kill me you know that right?"

"I'm totally worth it Nialler." Gemma said before leaning in and pecking him on the cheek. 

"Leave you alone for five minutes and you're already all over each other." Harry said with disgust in his voice. 

"Try two fucking hours mate."

Zayn smiled at Harry. "It's not been that long has it babe?"

"Felt like four. Harry you're not exactly quiet."

"What. Oh my god Gemma." Harry moaned. "You're so embarrassing."

"Uh excuse me baby Styles you're not the one who had to listen to their sibling having sex. It was horrifying."

"Yes Zayn there, fuck, harder, oh fuck, please Zayn, please." Niall screamed doing an uncannily spot on impression of Harry's deep voice. 

Harry blushed and turned his face into Zayn's neck. 

"Three floors and we still heard you. That's fucking impressive on both your parts. Or should I say impressive fucking." Niall was loving this. He'd already texted the double L's in preparation for when Zayn and Harry got back to Oxford. 

"I had to listen to Niall's shit playlist to drown out the noise." Gemma shuddered. 

"Alright you two you've had your fun, leave Harry alone." Zayn said in Harry's defence.

"Thank you." Harry whispered before placing a kiss on Zayn's collarbone, right where he'd sucked a massive love bite earlier. Zayn's breath hitched. 

"For fucks sake. Give it a rest you two, me and Gems don't need to see it as well as hear it."

Harry looked up at Niall. "Gems,you're calling my sister Gems now." 

"We've had two hours to get to know each other Harry. I've got so much shit on you now you wouldn't believe mate." Niall said excitedly.

"Gemma Styles you're supposed to be my sister."

"Sorry H, Niall just has this way of getting stuff out of you."

Harry just tutted. 

"In all seriousness Harry, erm you and Zayn so like things all good now??" Gemma said hopefully. 

Zayn smiled at Harry. "The best."

"So Zayn's coming back to Mum's with us for the rest of Easter holidays. I want him to meet Mum and Robin. Niall thank you so much for driving us down, Zayn is going to drive us back home if that's alright with you??"

Niall stood up, walked over to his friends and pulled them into a hug. "I'm so happy for you both."

"Cheers mate."

"Cheers Niall, still doesn't mean you can get it on with my sister." Harry joked. 

"Whose to say we haven't already got it on? We were alone for two hours after all." Gemma said. 

"For fucks sake." Harry said pushing Niall away as he began laughing. 

"She's joking mate." 

"She better be." Harry warned.

Zayn and Harry went to sit down at the kitchen table followed by Niall.

"Zayn. I just wanted to apologise again for what happened between you and Harry. I really hope that I can get to know you better over the next few days. Not least because I have the best baby pictures of Harry you'll ever see." Gemma said before ducking out of Harry's outstretched arm. 

"I'm looking forward to it." Zayn said. He was still a bit wary of Gemma, but he was going to spend the next week with Harry's family so he was going to make an effort. 

Gemma sighed with relief. "I'd never have forgiven myself if I ruined what the two of you have. Plus Harry sounds like he's getting the best sex of his life so you know."

"Next time you even entertain the idea of bringing a boy home I'm going to embarrass the fuck out of you Gemma." Harry said with a big fat smile on his face. 

"Yeah yeah you haven't got it in you."

"We'll see." Harry said smirking. 

"I'm going to go pack some stuff and ring my mum and let her know what's happening." Zayn said.

"Ok love." Harry pressed a kiss to Zayn's temple before Zayn got up to leave the kitchen. 

"Hang on I'll give you a hand Zayn, leave the Styles siblings to it." Niall followed Zayn out of the room practically jumping on his back as they left.

"You didn't mind me teasing did you H?"

"Nah it's what we do." Harry said easily. 

"I'm pleased you got everything sorted with Zayn. I can see you love him very much."

"God it's not embarrassingly obvious is it?"

"Doesn't matter if it is. You look good together. You look happy. I'm sorry I almost fucked it up for you." Gemma said quietly. 

"I've already told you I bear some responsibility Gem. But, thank you. I love him a lot, it's a bit scary at times if I'm honest."

"Love always is."

"Thanks oh wise one."

"Oi I was trying to be serious." Gemma hit Harry around the back of the head. 

"Ow." Harry said, rubbing the back of his head.

"Sorry."

"He's not what you imagined Gem. I know you had all these ideas of what a posh boy would be, but Zayn isn't like that nor is Niall or the double L's. They're good people. They're not cruel or mean, they've been nothing but lovely to me. I'm sure you'll meet the others at some point. Niall has this crazy idea of us all forming a band so if that happens you'll have to come down and see us play."

"Yeah Niall's already invited me."

"That little fucker." 

"As a friend Harry calm down."

"Yeah alright. Gem, do you think Mum will like Zayn?"

"What would you do if she didn't?"

Harry swallowed hard. "I've never disagreed with mum before, not really, not about important stuff. So if she didn't like him then it wouldn't matter because Zayn is going to be in my life come what may."

At that Gemma burst into song with Harry joining in. Gemma stopped and grabbed her phone, scrolling through until she could find the song. They got to the chorus and Harry began singing at the top of his lungs in his deep rasp. "Come what may, come what may." 

Before Harry could get the last line out, Zayn appeared in the doorway and interrupted. He looked straight at Harry, his over enthusiastic, loving, mesmerising, hot as fuck Harry and began to sing. "I will love you till my dying day."

Harry smiled the joy written all over his face. "I knew you liked that film."

"He's a keeper baby Styles." Gemma said. 

"I know Gem, I know." Harry said before walking over to Zayn and planting a soft kiss on his lips. 

****************

They saw Niall off half an hour later after Gemma had made him some sandwiches to take on the journey home. It was Zayn's house but Gemma made herself right at home in the kitchen. 

"She's freaking me out Zayn, she never does shit like this."

"Calm down babe. Maybe she's trying to impress me by getting on with one of my friends."

"Mmmmm it's weird." 

Niall finally left with a promise from Gemma to come see their band when they finally got together. "See you boys in a couple of weeks yeah. Be happy." Then he was gone leaving Gemma, Harry and Zayn. 

"Right we might as well head out." Zayn said picking up his bag. "All ready??"

"Yes Zayn." The Styles siblings chorused. 

They locked up and were finally on the way to Holmes Chapel. Once they arrived Zayn had insisted on stopping at a florists in the village before meeting Harry's mum. "I want to make a good impression. I promise it's the only thing I'll buy."

"All you need is yourself to make a good impression."

"I'm staying in your mums house the least I can do is bring her flowers."

"Fine my mum loves any sort of flowers so whatever you like will be fine."

Zayn spent ages in the florist trying to decide, dragging Harry around by the hand until the florist had made up a beautiful bouquet for him. "Thanks so much."

"It's a pleasure Anne will love them."

"Oh you know Anne?" Zayn said surprised. 

"It's a village my love everyone knows everyone and I recognised young Harry here."

"Hi Miss Dottie" Harry said with a big smile. "Miss Dottie used to come in every Saturday at the bakery for a Viennese Whirl and a cup of tea." 

"It was my wife's favourite, God rest her soul. I was simply carrying on the tradition. Harry here used to humour me sometimes by joining me for a chat."

"It was always a pleasure talking to you Miss D."

"So without sounding indelicate, would you be Harry's young man??"

Zayn couldn't help smiling. "Yes I'm Harry's. My name is Zayn, it's lovely to meet you Miss Dottie." Zayn held out his hand.

"Oh so well mannered." Dottie said, shaking Zayn's hand. "Any friend or should I say boyfriend of Harry's is a friend of mine. I'm guessing you met down at fancy Oxford."

"Yeah on Harry's first day." Zayn said squeezing Harry's hand. 

"We are so proud of Harry making it down to Oxford on a scholarship. He worked so hard to get in. How are your studies going Harry?"

"I've only got one term left now and I think it's going well."

"He's being modest Miss Dottie. He's doing amazingly. Top marks every time and on track for a First."

Harry could hear the proudness in Zayn's voice and it made him blush.

"He does all that with two jobs as well." Zayn said.

"He always was a hard worker. Are you home for the holidays Harry?"

"Yeah, Zayn is meeting mum for the first time." Zayn smiled because he knew Harry didn't count his first meeting with Zayn as an actual meeting. 

"Ah so that's why the flowers."

"I'm a bit nervous." Zayn admitted.

"Would you mind a bit of advice from someone who has been in your situation?"

"Of course."

"Hang on then. I'll pop the closed sign down for ten minutes and Harry you text Gemma and tell her we won't be long. I can see her stewing in the car from here. Never could sit still that one." Dottie walked over to the door leaving Zayn and Harry by the counter. 

"She's amazing."

"Miss Dottie coming into the shop was the highlight of my day sometimes." Harry text Gemma who simply responded with a two finger emoji. 

"Right boys. Harry can you pop out back and please get the spare chair for yourself while me and Zayn sit down."

"Sure no problem." Harry hurried off out the back leaving Dottie and Zayn alone. 

"He's a charmer that one, and not only that but he has the biggest heart. You hold on to him now, you hear."

"I don't intend to let him go anywhere." Zayn smiled just as Harry walked back in with another chair. 

"Whatever Miss Dottie is telling you about me don't listen. She's a menace."Harry joked.

"It's alright babe, she was only telling me good stuff."

"That's alright then." Harry said bopping Zayn on the nose.

"Goodness you two are quite adorable together."

Zayn and Harry held hands and just smiled. 

"You remind me of me and my Olive. I met my Olive when we were fourteen, I like to think fate played a part because believe me we wouldn't normally have mixed in the same circles. Olive was from the big houses up in Manchester and I was from here. We were on a school trip to the city and Olive happened to be there with her friends. We clicked straight away, and wrote to each other constantly, no fancy pants iphones back in my day." Dottie joked. "We were best friends and yet we hardly even saw each till we were sixteen. Olive invited me to her house for dinner, I'd never seen anything like it."

"I know that feeling." Harry said squeezing Zayn's hand.

"Olive's family were....well....not exactly welcoming would be the best way to describe it. They certainly didn't want Olive and I spending time with each other that's for sure. So we didn't."

This time it was Zayn who squeezed Harry's hand.

"We carried on writing to each to other, only I sent my letters to Olive to one of her city friends so her parents wouldn't know. As far as they were aware I didn't exist anymore. Then Olive turned eighteen and she left home, she just turned up at my house one day. I nearly passed out when I opened the front door."

"Oh it's so romantic." Harry cooed.

"At that point we were only friends, it took another three years of mutual pining for Olive to admit she was in love with me. Goodness she was so brave. I'm not sure I would ever have had the courage to tell her for fear of being made to look a fool." 

"I know what that feels like." Zayn said, smiling at Harry.

"So what happened next?"

"Nothing much changed really. Back then things weren't like they are now. Being in love with a girl wasn't really talked about. Olive carried on living with me and my parents, we both managed to get jobs which was a rarity and because we were living at home we managed to save up. We paid some board to my parents and helped out when we could. We didn't really go out that much and we never got bored of each others company. We saved a bit more that way until we managed to scrape enough money together for a deposit on a little flat to rent."

"Did Olive's parents not help?" Zayn asked.

"Olive was stubborn and proud and firm in her beliefs. She saw them once a month for tea for an hour, just her not me mind you, and so she refused to take any money from them. 'We're a package deal Dottie, love me love you. I will not ask for help from them.' So she never did. It was their loss really, because Olive was wonderful and they missed out on that. I'm veering off track anyway. We moved into our little flat and I got a job here at the florists working for old Mr Dempsey."

"We weren't 'out' as you young ones like to call it, but we didn't hide it either. In those days most people just assumed we were best friends who lived together and neither of us disabused anyone of that notion. Mr White knew though, he knew everything and he didn't have any children so he treated me and Olive like we were his own. He left me the business when he passed and Olive started working with me and we built it up into the palace you see hear today."

"People came all the way from Manchester for Miss Dottie and Miss Olive's flowers."

"I bet they did, the window display is stunning." Zayn said admiring it once again. 

"Thank you Zayn."

"Olive was better than me at it, but she taught me a few things over the years in more ways than one. She made up all the flowers for our wedding. It was beautiful."

"When did you get married?"

"Two weeks after it became legal. It felt like we'd waited our whole life for that day so we had the whole works."

"Everyone in the village loves Dottie and Olive so there was a big party in the town square that everyone chipped in for. It was amazing." Harry sniffed.

"I've rambled on for far too long about my life without even saying what I wanted to. I've known Anne for a long time and she is nothing like Olive's parents. Yes she might have reservations because you come from a different world like my Olive, as did my parents for a little bit. But, she's good people just like Harry so she'll welcome you with open arms. I promise you have nothing to worry about."

"Thanks Miss Dottie." Zayn said.

"Pleasure love, and both of you feel free to pop in for a chat the next time you're home." 

"If I'm invited back." Zayn said jokingly. Harry looked at him with a hurt expression on his face.

"I'm going to pop out back for a minute and see if i can't fancy up the flowers a bit more." Miss Dottie said, before making a hasty retreat.

"Harry."

Harry sighed and looked down at the floor.

"Babe, look at me for a minute."

Harry didn't look up.

"Ok, look I didn't mean that. I was trying to be funny and make light of the situation and I realise now that was wrong and it's still a really sensitive subject. Fuck. I don't want us to be those people in a relationship who bring up stuff that should be left in the past."

"Zayn it's alright I'm not cross with you, you have every right to think that about my family. I'm sorry."

"Fuck Harry, I didn't want to make you upset. No apologising remember and I don't think that's what going to happen. Right." Zayn took Harrys' hand in his and tilted his chin so Harry was forced to look at him. "We leave all this behind yeah. It happened and now it's sorted. My family love you, a bit too much in my opinion." Harry giggled. "I hope your family love me just as much, although I think Gemma would be hard pressed to like me as much as she likes Niall." Zayn said with a straight face before he started laughing.

"Ugh you're mean." Harry pouted.

"You love me anyway." Zayn said with absolute confidence.

"I absolutely do." Harry leant in and let his lips brush Zayn's.

"I see you boys have sorted everything out. Zayn your flowers are all ready now, and Harry please give your love to my Mum."

"I will do Miss Dottie. It was lovely to see you." Harry stood up and moved round the other side of the counter to hug Dottie.

"Don't be a stranger my love, I want to know all about how you and Zayn are getting on. The shop is on Facebook now so you can send me a message through there when you're back at Oxford."

"Look at you getting with the times, Miss Olive would have been proud." Harry squeezed a bit tighter before stepping back next to Zayn and holding his hand.

"Good luck my loves, even though I have every faith you won't need it. You look at each other like me and my Olive did so I know you'll be alright. Be happy and never go to bed on a cross word no matter how tough that may be."

Zayn turned away and coughed and discreetly wiped away a small tear, before turning back around and stepping closer to Harry, virtually snuggling into him. Harry turned to him. "Everything alright love?" Zayn just nodded. "Thanks once again for such lovely flowers, and Zayn and I will message you soon."

"Bye my loves." Dottie moved from behind the counter and saw them to the door, giving Gemma a quick wave as she opened the door for them. Zayn and Harry stepped outside before turning around and giving Miss Dottie a hug each. "Bye" Both of them said, before walking down the street towards the car. 

Before they got there Harry stopped. "Are you alright? You got a bit quiet at the end and I thought maybe you were upset?" Harry asked as he gently ran his hand down Zayn's arm.

"It's just....fuck...like I don't want to freak you out." Zayn said pulling back slightly from Harry. 

"Hey." Harry said as he pulled Zayn back towards him. "Please don't do that. What's wrong? You can tell me, I promise I won't freak out." Harry's concern for Zayn was written all across his face. 

"Miss Olive and Miss Dottie they were together for always, and like my parents have been together for ever and that's what I want Harry. I want a forever person. Maybe that's unrealistic in the world we live in, but I want it so bad. I want a family. I want to be happy. I want to love someone for the rest of my life and know that whatever shit gets thrown us and whatever difficulties we face we'll get through it. I realise this must be scaring the shit out of you and I'm not expecting anything from you but I just, I want it all." Zayn took a deep breath. "That's what I'm hoping we'll have eventually, because even now I can't ever see myself loving anyone else but you."

Harry threw his arms around Zayn's neck. "I want it all too Zayn. I know it's early, but I feel the same." 

Zayn felt the relief coursing through him. He placed a tender kiss on Harry's mouth before they were interrupted by Gemma beeping the car horn.

"Get a move on you two, we've not got all day."

"Fucking Gemma." Harry grumbled, whilst Zayn laughed. "Right, you ready to meet the rest of my family."

"Can't wait." Zayn said smiling.


	31. Chapter 31

In the end Zayn had no need to be nervous at all. Anne and Robin loved him and welcomed him into the family. Zayn discovered that Anne was just as nervous to meet him as he was her. That helped both of them overcome their nerves. 

Harry spent some of the Easter holidays showing Zayn around Holmes Chapel. He took him to the bakery where Zayn met Barbara who pretty much fell in love with him at first sight. Zayn got a glimpse of Harry's school and they went for a drink with some of Harry's old school friends who were a bit wary of Zayn at first, but by the end of the evening they'd come round to the idea of them dating. 

They also took Miss Dottie out for tea and afterwards Zayn drove her to the graveyard where Zayn was introduced to Miss Olive for the first time. All in all Zayn's first visit was a success with promised of return visits aplenty. Zayn had even managed to extract a promise from Anne that the whole family would come down to Zayn's family house in Bradford for an extended weekend before Harry and Zayn's new term began in September. Trisha was most excited to meet Anne and she'd already made Zayn give her Anne's mobile number so they could start chatting. 

The morning they were leaving Gemma had drawn Zayn aside and taken him into the garden. "My mum loves you."

"Anne is lovely, you can see where Harry gets his wonderful nature from." 

"Not me then." Gemma laughed.

"You've got some admirable qualities." Zayn smiled. 

"Yeah yeah you charmer. Look, I just wanted to say I've never seen my brother look happier, and that means a lot to me so thank you."

"Gemma you don't have to thank me."

"Yeah I do. Just....like be kind to him. I mean I know you will, but like he deserves to be loved, so break his heart and I'll break you." Gemma said with a broad smile on her face. 

"I won't break his heart. Promise Gemma." He pulled Gemma into a hug. "I love him and that won't change. I could never hurt him."

Gemma and Zayn stood hugging as Harry sauntered into the garden. "Should I be worried here?" Harry joked. 

Zayn looked up to see Harry smirking. Zayn's stepped out of Gemma's arms and made his way over to Harry. "Never babe." Zayn leant in and brushed Harry's cheek with his lips. "I was just saying bye to Gemma, are you all ready to go?"

"Yeah, Robin just helped me with the bags and stuff. I was thinking before we head back to Oxford we could pop in for lunch at yours and say hi to everyone. I feel a bit guilty for dragging you away from them for the holiday."

"Nothing to feel guilty about. I'm so happy I got to meet your family Harry, I've had the best time so thank you."

"Even Gemma?" Harry joked. 

Zayn turned to look at Gemma and smiled. "Yeah even Gemma." Zayn took Harry's hand and they walked into the house and out the front to Zayn's car where Anne and Robin were waiting. Robin shook Zayn's hand and said what a pleasure it had been to meet him. Harry hugged his mum, Robin and then Gemma before getting in the car. Gemma and Robin stepped back giving Zayn a few minutes with Anne. 

"It was a real treat to meet you Zayn. Thank you once again for the beautiful flowers."

"Thank you for having in me your home, it's lovely."

"Well it's not what you used to too, but we like it."

"A home is not about bricks and mortar or how many rooms it has. It's about how much love you can feel inside. Your home has that in abundance."

"Thank you for loving my son Zayn."

"Thank you for letting me." Zayn said before Anne pulled him into her arms. 

"Don't be a stranger, you're welcome anytime."

"As are you all at mine."

"Look after him for me in Oxford."

"I will do Anne, and I'll see you in a few months."

Zayn pulled away and got into his car. Robin came and stood beside Anne and wrapped his arm around her waist. Gemma stood beside Anne as they waited to wave the boys off. Harry wound down his window and started waving frantically as Zayn pulled away from the kerb.

"Bye love you all." Harry shouted."

"Love you too Harry. Bye Zayn." Anne said as the boys finally became a speck in the distance.

Harry turned to Zayn as they made their way home to Zayn's. "Oh my God my family love you."

"Just like mine love you babe."

"So I guess that means the summer rail trip is on?" Harry asked hopefully.

"I couldn't think of anything better than spending my summer with you. Love you." Zayn said 

"Love you too Zayn." 

As they drove back to Oxford they looked forward to spending many more summers together.


	32. EPILOGUE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally I hear you shout, the epilogue! For those of you who made it this far thanks so much for reading. Maybe one day I'll learn to edit and get rid of unnecessary bits. 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed, if not then that's alright too :-)

"After all the shit she gave me I cannot believe this day is happening." Harry grumbled as he sat in the front row next to Zayn. "Seriously Zayn, all that stuff about posh boys and now look at her." 

Zayn squeezed Harry's hand and gazed at him fondly. "I know babe."

"You're humouring me aren't you?" Harry said.

"Zayn smiled. "Yes babe."

"Zaaayyyn. You're supposed to be on my side."

"I am always on your side, you know that."

"Doesn't it bother you?" Harry said grumpily.

"Niall is one of my best mates and he is marrying Gemma, the woman who is now my sister-in-law. I've never seen Niall happier than he is now, and having come to know Gemma quite well these past few years I've also never seen her happier. Agreed?"

"Yes." Harry mumbled.

"Don't you want to see Gemma and Niall happy?"

"Of course I do, I just.....like I remember sometimes when we were back at Oxford and everything that happened between us in the first year and we were apart."

"Babe, we were apart for about a week and then it was all sorted."

Harry looked down at the floor. "I know, but it was like the longest week ever."

"Haz look at me." Harry looked up at Zayn. "It was for me too, but look at us now. We've never been happier. Gemma and Niall are getting married. Our life is good."

"I know.

Zayn ran his thumb gently over Harry's lips. Before he could take it any further they were disturbed by a loud shout at the back of the church.

"For fuck's sake, who left that there. Fuck. Fuck." Luckily the only occupants of the church at the moment were Harry and Zayn so Louis was not on the end of any disapproving glances or words. Harry and Zayn turned around to see Louis sprawled on the floor amongst the ruins of a broken flower display. "Fuck me, Gemma is going to kill me."

"Uncle Lou Lou will you please stop saying bad words. Daddies tell me off if I do, so you are not allowed to either." 

"I'm sorry Hope, but some inconsiderate person left this flower display right in the doorway and now I'm going to face the wrath of Gemma. Sometimes a bad word is necessary, but don't tell anyone I told you that." Louis said before winking at Hope.

"What does wrath mean?" Hope said looking puzzled.

"Have you seen Aunty Gem when she gets cross, she makes that funny face?" 

"Yes, she is scary."

"That's wrath my darling." Louis managed to scramble to his feet whilst brushing the flower remnants from his trousers. "Now I really need to hide the evidence of my flower mishap so would you like to help me, we can make it a game and see who can hide it the best."

"Yes yes yes yes, you're the best." Hope said before flinging herself at Louis.

"If we're quick we can do it before anyone sees us."

"I think that boat has sailed Lou." Said a familiar voice.

Louis screamed, well he would deny it was a scream but even Hope thought he screamed. 

"No screaming." Hope said. "Don't you know we are in a church Uncle Lou Lou."

It was all Zayn and Harry could do to keep from laughing. "Yes Uncle Lou Lou this is church, have some respect." Harry said with a huge smirk on his face.

"Yes thank you Harold, your daughter has already made me aware. Also that was not a scream."

"I think it was Lou Lou." Hope whispered loudly.

"Fine, it was perhaps a slight scream. Who cares about the scream, more importantly why are you two skulking about in the church." 

"Gemma was getting a bit high strung so Zayn and I made ourselves scarce for a bit. We're going back in about fifteen minutes, and don't worry about the flowers because Miss Dottie always bring some extra just in case of accidents."

"Thanks fu....goodness for that." Louis said.

"No bad words in front of our daughter Lou." Zayn said trying to keep a straight face. 

"Alright alright." Louis huffed. "So, are you going to help me and Hope here clean up?"

"Pleaseeeeeeee help us. I'm too little to do it all by myself." Hope said."

"Hey you, I'm going to be helping too." Louis said.

Hope started giggling. "Don't be silly Lou Lou. You never help, you just sit there and erm....oh..Daddy what word did you use, it was super.....?"

"Supervise Hope. I said Uncle Lou Lou sits there and supervises." Harry said whilst Zayn burst out laughing.

"Oh is that what Daddy said Hope. Did I ever tell you about the time....."

"Hope doesn't need to hear any stories today Lou." 

"You're not cross with my Daddies are you Lou Lou??"

"Course not darling."

"Good because they also said they're glad you're my uncle."

Louis looked smug. "Oh did they now."

"Yep. Isn't that right?" Hope said.

"There may be an element of truth in that." Zayn said reluctantly. 

"Did they say anything else??" Louis enquired.

"That they love you very much." Hope said, placing a kiss on Louis' cheek.

"Oh." Louis said, swallowing down the lump in his throat.

"We really do Lou, we couldn't wish for a better godparent for Hope than you." Zayn said sincerely.

Louis sniffed and Hope gazed at him frowning.

"No tears Lou Lou, this is a happy day. Aunty Gemma and Ni are getting wedded."

"Married, love they're getting married." Harry said as he stroked Hopes's hair. 

"They're happy tears darling, because you're my Hope and I love you."

Hope nuzzled into Louis and kissed his cheek again before squirming to be let down. "Down Lou Lou please."

Louis gently deposited Hope back on the ground whereby she instantly ran to Zayn. "Hug Daddy please." Zayn picked her up and hugged her, Hope then turned to Harry and called him over. "Big hug now."

Harry walked over to Zayn and Hope and wrapped his arms around them both.

"Now you Lou Lou." Hope said in a quiet voice.

Louis joined them all in a four way hug before an Irish voice rang out in the church.

"What the fuck is this mess in here?"

Hope's head popped out from behind the boys and scowled at Niall. "Uncle Ni, must I always say this. No bad words in church." 

"Sorry Hopester, what happened? Why are there flowers on the floor?"

"Lou Lou." Hope said quickly.

"I should have know." Niall laughed.

"In my defence Niall, they were literally in the doorway. We were just about to clear them up though."

"You were about to? Yeah right." Niall snorted.

"I was, isn't that right Hope." Louis said smugly.

"Yes Uncle Ni, Lou Lou was going to super....super..."

"Vise." Zayn whispered in Hope's ear.

'Supervise!!" Hope yelled. 

"That sounds more like it. Well we'd better get on with it, because I overheard Liam saying Gemma was heading this way to make sure the church was ready."

"Gemma is on her way here?" Harry asked.

"Yep."

"Right." Harry said clapping his hands together. "Let's get this shit cleared up then."

"Daddy!!!!"

Zayn, Louis and Niall all burst out laughing.

****************

They managed to clear all the flowers away before Gemma got there, and from then on the wedding passed without a hitch. Hope was a flower girl and she loved every minute of it with all the guests cooing as she walked down the aisle throwing petals in front of her. When she got to the altar she spun around and declared "Look Daddies I'm like a princess." Cue more oohs and aww's from the guests. Hope knew how to work a crowd already which terrified Zayn and Harry. Zayn was convinced she got her charm from Harry, he could talk anyone into anything with those dimples and smile much the same as Hope. He watched as Hope curtsied before coming to take her place in between Harry and Zayn. "Did I do it right Daddy?" Hope said gazing eagerly up at Zayn. 

"You were perfect Hope, wasn't she babe."

"Just like a princess love."

Hope preened and held out her hands for both Harry and Zayn to take. The rest of the wedding passed smoothly. Both Harry and Zayn shed a little tear. Despite Harry's grumblings before the ceremony he'd only ever wanted Gemma to be happy, and he was certain Niall was the man for that. 

Two hours later everyone was in the marquee for the reception. Gemma and Niall had already had their first dance and now Niall was threatening to get the rest of the boys up on stage to play a couple of songs. Zayn had finally convinced him that they'd wait until nearer the end of the night to give it a go and Niall readily agreed. 

Zayn left Niall in the capable hands of his now wife and walked back to where Harry was keeping Hope entertained during a dance break. 

"Is Niall alright?"

"Yeah he wants us boys to get on stage and do a couple of songs."

"What did you say?"

"I said we'd sing at the end."

"Smart move love because you know Niall will have forgotten all about it by then. Not just a pretty face are you?" Harry said leaning in to kiss Zayn. 

"My daddies do have pretty faces" Hope said, poking her fingers in Zayn and Harry's cheeks. "You sing later too, promised Uncle Ni so have to now."

"Later baby." Zayn said. 

"Yes!!!!!!!!" Hope turned round and shouted "My daddies are singing later." 

Zayn put his head in his hands. Harry simply rubbed his back. 

****************

Hope was now up dancing with some of the other little ones. She was in her element, showing them all what to do. 

"Guess those dance lessons are really paying off babe." 

"She certainly didn't get her dance skills from me that's for sure." Harry laughed. 

Zayn took Harry hands and squeezed. "I happen to love your dancing. You look hot when you dance."

Harry laughed. "You've never told me that before."

"Didn't want to give you a big head."

"What was hot about it?"

"How you never give a shit what you look like. You just throw yourself into the music, arms and those long fucking legs everywhere. Then obviously your hair babe, you know how I feel about that." 

Harry ran his hands through his hair and smiled at Zayn. "Like that yeah?"

"Harry, we're at a wedding reception."

"So. Remember what we did at our wedding reception when we slipped away for a bit." Harry's eyes sparkled as he bit on his bottom lip. 

Zayn could feel his cock getting hard at the mere thought of what they'd done at their own wedding. Harry saw Zayn's eyes darken and he placed his hand on Zayn's upper thigh and squeezed gently. 

"Hope is with her Aunty Gemma, what say you and I sneak off for a bit?" Harry leant in to Zayn and let his lips brush Zayn's cheek. "Want you to pull my hair love whilst I'm sucking you off." Harry's hand moved further up Zayn's thigh and began to press gently on Zayn's cock. "So hard for me already Zayn. Want you in my mouth so bad, we've got time love. I'll swallow you down.....I'll"

Harry didn't finish his sentence as Zayn grabbed his hand and and began pulling him out of the marquee. The wedding was being held in the grounds of Niall's family home. Currently all the guests were either inside the marquee or out in the garden. Zayn pulled Harry towards the main house and slipped in the side door through the kitchen and up to the first floor bathroom. "If we use Niall's bedroom he'll kill us so the bathroom will do." 

Harry locked the bathroom door and pushed Zayn up against it. Without any hesitation Harry dropped to his knees and unzipped Zayn's trousers. He pulled Zayn's trousers and boxers down in one swift movement and watched as Zayn's hard cock slapped back against his stomach. "Never get tired of your cock love. So pretty, almost as beautiful as you, but not quite." Harry wrapped his hand around Zayn's cock and began to stroke watching as some pre-cum slipped out. Harry wasted no time in licking it up.

"Harry please."

"You want all of my mouth? Say it Zayn."

"Yes yes yes."

Harry instantly took Zayn into his mouth and began working him over in the way only Harry knew how to. Harry tugged on Zayn's hand and he immediately began to pull on Harry's hair. Harry moaned around Zayn's cock and Zayn tried his hardest not to thrust forward further into Harry's mouth. If anyone walked by the bathroom they'd be able to hear the unmistakeable noise of two people getting off. Zayn didn't hold back when it come to how loud he was and Harry loved it. He wanted to hear Zayn shouting his name, he wanted to hear Zayn's accent broaden the closer he got to the edge. Zayn wrapped his hands in Harry's curls and began pulling harder, letting him know he was about to come. Harry increased his steady pace until he could feel Zayn's legs trembling. 

"Harreh!"

Zayn finally let go in Harrys mouth and Harry eagerly swallowed. He gave Zayn's cock a final few licks before pulling off Zayn and licking his lips. "Always taste so good love." 

Zayn took two deep breaths before pulling Harry to his feet. He kissed the taste of himself out of Harry's mouth, before pushing his hand down Harry's trousers and finally getting his hand on Harry's cock. "So big babe. I can just about get my hand round it."

"Zayn please."

"So hard, is this just from sucking my cock? That get you this hard Harry? Having your lips around my cock. Swallowing me down. Making me shout your name so everyone knows what we're doing." Zayn's hand got faster as Harry's breath begin to hitch and his eyes dilated even more. "Making sure everyone knows I'm yours. Well I am. You're mine and I'm yours. Always Harry."

Harry was on the verge and Zayn knew it would only take three words to tip him over the edge. 

"Like you babe."

"Fuck." Harry slumped into Zayn's arms as he came hard. "I really hope I didn't make a mess of my trousers." Harry drawled. 

Zayn smiled and pulled his hand out of Harry's trousers. He held it up for Harry to see and began slowly licking Harry off the palm of his hand. "No mess now babe." Zayn smirked. 

"You're filthy." 

"You wouldn't have me any other way."

"No I wouldn't." Harry said before pulling Zayn in for a quick kiss. "We should probably go back before someone realises we're missing." 

"Think we might need to make sure we're presentable first babe." They looked at themselves in the mirror and it was obvious what they'd been doing. Harry was flushed and his lips looked even more swollen than usual. Zayn's eyes were heavy lidded and his suit looked a bit rumpled. 

"No point. I don't care if everyone knows."

Zayn pulled Harry in once more for a bruising kiss, before letting go. They made sure they looked a bit decent before sneaking out the bathroom, down the stairs, and through the kitchen door. They slowly wandered back to the reception hand in hand.

****************

The rest of the evening passed in a flash, until somehow Zayn and Harry found themselves being dragged on stage. 

The party was winding down and Zayn thought he'd managed to escape singing. Hope was asleep in Harry's arms so he thought he was safe. Until Niall got on the microphone. 

"Harry!! Harry Malik-Styles where are you? Come on I need you up here to sing with me. Narry reunited." 

"For fucks sake it's not just you who sang with him." Zayn grumbled. 

"Oh I see. Now there's a chance of Narry getting back together you're interested in singing." Harry laughed. 

"Don't laugh at me." Zayn whined. 

"Niall has just married my sister you dick."

"I know Harry I was there." 

"I like when you're a bit jealous. Gets me hot." Harry whispered. 

"Stop it." Zayn smiled. "Right I don't suppose we've got much choice then do we. You better wake Hope up, she'll be proper pissed if you let her sleep through the singing. I'll go get Louis and Liam and I'll meet you at the stage." 

Zayn stood up and kissed to the top of Harry's head before leaving to find the Louis and Liam. 

Harry stroked Hope's hair and gently began waking her up. "Hope, time to wake up." Nothing. Not a flicker. "Hope, your Daddies are going to sing now." Still nothing. "Just like Zayn." Harry laughed. "Hope Amala Malik-Styles, sing sing time." Finally a flicker as Hope yawned. 

"Mmmmm sleepy Daddy. Too much dancing." Hope said. 

"I know baby, but do you want to hear your daddies, Uncle Ni, Lou Lou and Li Li sing?"

Hope's eyes immediately shot open. "Yes!!!!"

"Come on then love, you can sit with Aunty Gem and watch us."

"Oh my goodness daddy I'm so excited." Hope squealed. 

Harry stood up holding Hope securely in his arms. Hope wound her fingers in Harry's curls. "What are you going to sing Daddy?"

"I have no idea, I'm sure Uncle Ni has got something planned." 

Harry made his way through tables and chairs as Hope chatted away to him, not requiring any response from Harry. Finally he reached Gemma. 

"Baby Styles, and is that my beautiful niece Gemma??"

"Aunty Gemma!! Did you know Daddies, Uncle Ni, Lou Lou and Li Li are going to be singing. I'm so excited I could burst."

"Will you watch her while I go do this."

"Of course Haz. Hope you want to sit on my lap or do you want your own chair?"

Hope gave Gemma what would on day be considered a withering look. "Aunty Gemma I'm four now I can use a chair, thank you very much."

"Mmmm been spending a lot of time with Uncle Lou have you?" Gemma said. 

"Love Lou Lou, we're going to get wedded like you and Uncle Ni when I'm a big girl." Hope said smiling. "Uncle Li Li is just looking after him for a while until I can." 

Gemma and Harry both smiled. "Does Uncle Lou know about this?" Harry said. 

"It's a surprise Daddy. Don't tell him."

"My lips are sealed baby. Right I have to go sing now." Harry sat Hope on the chair beside Gemma and kissed her on the cheek. "Promise to clap for us Hope."

"I'll be shouting for you all Daddy!"

"Ok, see you both in a bit. Love you. Bye."

"Bye Daddy, love you too."

"See you Haz."

Harry walked up to where the band had been playing to find the boys all ready to go.

"Harry!" Niall said. "Yes Narry are ready to rock." 

Harry was the only one who noticed Zayn muttering under his breath. "You ready then Niall?" 

"Let's sing the shit out of this." Niall shouted.

Fifteen minutes later they were done. Despite Zayn's initial reservations he'd had a blast. He'd also somehow forgotten how fucking hot Harry was on stage. He performed like they were at Wembley Stadium, not in a marquee in a garden. Fuck that was his husband. Sometimes the reality of being married to Harry was overwhelming. 

Hope hadn't stopped cheering the entire time they were singing. She'd even run to the front of the dance floor at one point and sang her little heart out. She was now back with Gemma waiting for the boys to come back to the table. Hope crawled into Gemma's lap and within two minutes was fast asleep. Gemma quickly waved Anne over so she could take her sleeping granddaughter for a bit. "Cheers mum."

"You don't have to thank me love, any opportunity to spend time with this angel even if she is asleep. God she's so like Harry when he was that age. But then she'll say something and it's like Zayn is in the room with you." 

Since Anne had first met Zayn they'd became close friends. She couldn't have wished for a better husband for Harry and she was thankful every day that Zayn had come into Harry's life. Trisha and Anne were also particularly close and they'd often travel to each other houses for a visit. 

"Will you let Harry and Zayn know I've taken Hope back to the hotel with me. Tell them she can sleep in mine and Robin's room tonight."

"Ok will do."

"You look so beautiful Gemma. It's been a wonderful day, I'm so happy for you and Niall." 

"Thanks mum. We'll see you in the morning before we head off. Love you."

"Love you too Gemma." 

Anne headed off with Hope while Gemma waited for her husband to make his way back to the table. She didn't have to wait long before he was back with Harry, Zayn and the double L's.

"Gemma, my angel, love of my life and my beautiful wife. I have returned to take you home to our marital bed for the night." 

"Niall my love, my super hot husband. Your performance was amazing and now you really do need to take me home. I'm all hot and bothered, and I need you to get me out of this dress and into our bed."

"I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit." Harry whispered to Zayn. "I really don't need to hear this." Zayn just laughed. 

"Niall, Gemma. It's been an absolute pleasure to have been at your wedding. I love you both very much and I wish you nothing but happiness." Zayn pulled Niall in for a hug and then leant down and hugged Gemma. 

"Cheers mate. Love you too. I couldn't wish for a better brother-in-law."

"Thanks Niall." Zayn said. 

"Well apart from Harry obviously. Narry for life and all that." Niall said. 

"Stop teasing my husband Niall." Harry said. 

"He makes it too easy though." Niall laughed. 

"Haz, mum has taken Hope back with her and Robin and they said they'll take her for the night." 

Zayn glanced at Harry who simply raised his eyebrows. He felt a shiver go down his spine. 

"Thanks Gemma. It was a beautiful wedding, I'm so very happy for you both. Love you." Now it was Harry's turn to pull Gemma and Niall into a hug. 

Liam and Louis repeated the sentiment and soon Gemma and Niall were saying goodbye to everyone and heading back up to Niall's family house. 

By now most of the other guests were heading home so it was just Louis, Liam, Harry and Zayn left round the table. "Well who'd have thought Nialler would end up marrying your sister Harold. I'm pleased though, they genuinely look happy together."

"I think Niall was smitten from the start. It took Gem a little longer to get on board with it, but you can see how much they love each other. It's been such a beautiful day." Harry said. 

"Hope seemed to be enjoying herself. She dragged me up to dance with her at one point." Liam laughed. "I'm knackered now. I think I'm going to head back to the hotel, shall I call us a taxi Lou?"

"Yes please love, I'll come meet you at the bottom of the drive in about ten minutes." 

Liam leant in and kissed Louis goodbye before heading off off to sort out a taxi for them both. 

"You too are adorable together, you know that right?" Zayn teased Lou.

"Fuck you Malik." Louis growled.

"Who'd have thought when you were fucking each other into the mattresses on the casual, that the two of you would be in a loving secure relationship." Zayn said jokingly.

"Alright laugh it up you dick." Louis said.

"I'm sorry babe, you know I'm only teasing. Harry and I are so happy that you and Liam managed to sort your shit out. You're great together. Seriously. " Zayn leant over and pulled Louis into a hug.

"Thanks."

"Although, Liam might have some competition for you." Harry said, trying to contain his glee.

"Harold I've told you already, this arse belongs to Liam now." Louis said, with a straight a face as he could possibly manage.

"Shut up Lou, I was obviously talking about Hope."

"What do you mean?" Louis said. 

"Have I missed something babe?" Zayn asked.

"It was while you were rounding up the boys to go on stage. You cannot mention this to Hope, either of you. She let slip that she was planning on marrying Lou Lou when she was older and that Liam was just looking after him for her. She was proper serious."

"Good taste that child." Louis said smugly.

"Hardly." Zayn said eyeing Louis.

"Hey you named me godfather."

"Best thing we ever did Lou." Zayn said with sincerity in his voice. 

"I agree and so does Hope which is the most important thing." Harry said.

"Right. As it's a wedding and I'm a bit drunk, I'm going to tell you both something and we shall never mention it again." Louis took a deep breath. "As best man at your wedding I said a lot of nice things anyway so all that still counts obviously. Harold."

"Louis." Harry said with a smirk on his face.

"You coming to Oxford is the best thing that ever happened to Zayn. I'm not including Hope in that obviously, because she is the best that that has happened for both of you. As his best mate, I wasn't sure anyone was ever going to be good enough for Zayn, but you proved me wrong. Thank you for loving him and for looking after him in a way I can't. Let's never speak of this again, and if you'll excuse me I need to go fuck my boyfriend into the mattress like we are still at college."

Louis stood up and both Harry and Zayn as one pulled him into a threeway hug. "Love you Lou." They both said.

"Love you both too. Now let me go see my Liam. Sunday dinner at yours yeah?" Louis said.

"Of course, see you then babe."

They all said their goodbyes again and then it was just Harry and Zayn left in the marquee. "I suppose we better head off now. A whole night to ourselves, what shall we do, what shall we do?" Harry joked.

"Finish off what we started in the bathroom earlier?" Zayn said pulling Harry into his arms.

"Let's go." Harry said quickly.

Zayn got their suit jackets and met Harry outside the marquee. He took Harry's hand and they began walking down the moonlit driveway.

"Thank you Zayn." 

"For what babe?"

"I wanted to say thanks for everything really. " Harry said squeezing Zayn's hand.

"I'm going to stop you right there babe. If this is going to be some speech where you go on about how lucky you were to meet me, how you can't believe someone like me could love someone like you then I don't want to hear it." 

"But Zayn...." Harry pouted.

"No Harry. We're equal in this relationship. You deserve my love and I deserve yours. I have never loved someone as much as I love you. You are everything to me for reasons too numerous to mention. We make each other better people." Zayn stopped walking and they stood in the middle of the path with the moon shining bright behind them. Zayn let go of Harry's hand, reached out and cradled his face between his hands, before leaning in and placing a tender kiss on his mouth. 

"I never thought that one day I'd be this happy. I mean I hoped obviously, everyone does. Look at us now babe. Married, own home we bought together, cat and a dog and friends we love. Then we've got Hope, our beautiful daughter who is so like you it's ridiculous with her big curls and dimples. I think we both love her more each day. I wouldn't have any of this without you. I wouldn't want any of this without you." Zayn gently brushed away the tears from Harry's cheeks. "You're it for me my darling."

"Zayn." Harry sniffed. "You're always so eloquent."

"I do have an English degree you know." Zayn said, in the haughtiest voice he could manage. Harry burst out laughing. 

"I love you so much Zayn, you're it for me too love. I think you always have been, from the first moment I saw you. My impossibly beautiful boy." Harry took his wedding ring off and brought his ring finger up to his lips. He softly kissed the tattoo that was usually hidden beneath the ring. In simple black script it said Zayn. If Zayn was to take his ring off a similar script could be found, except his said Harry. "Like you."

"Like you more babe." Zayn eased Harry's wedding ring back on, took Harry's hand in his and they began strolling back to the hotel secure in the knowledge they had everything they ever wanted. A home, a beautiful daughter and each other.


End file.
